You
You
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Hey
All right Floyd, that's it I've had enough
Boy that's funny
Oh come Floyd here you remember me I used to have my own horror show on TV
Well, you say what's count Floyd doing?
Vlogging a funny home video. Well, I'll tell you you can't make a buck doing those horror shows on TV anymore
You can't get them away
But you know the count I've always got my finger on the pulse of the nation and what's cleaning up now
Are those shows where you send in your videos and then you win big prizes?
Yeah, really big ones. Oh boy. That makes the counts blood just race and so it's a public service
I'm gonna teach you how you can do your own funny home videos. That's right
I'm gonna give you tips on comedy camera angles special effects, maybe even a few stunts
So you can make your own very funny home videos right in your own backyard
So now let's go in my backyard and start the show. Oh
Boy, that's a strong son. Oh boy. You need a sunscreen for that
You know you humans need about a 15 or 30, but the count put on
1900 this morning. That's right. Otherwise, I'd go poop. Well, let's take some video, huh?
Hey, there we go. Hey, yes. Oh, there's the spread not bad, huh? Yeah should be nice
it cost me a bundle and
Listen, maybe you could tell your friends to help out the count by buying these tape. Hey, hey this there's my pride and joy
Come junior
Hey, junior
junior
Oh, what's he doing over there? He can't hear me must have those earphones on again, junior
Junior I'm doing this this video the junior do something funny for the folks
Come on dad. Can't you get a real job?
He's he's funny right off the bat a chip off the old count boy if you want to see real funny though
Wait till he tries to hit me up for his next allowance. Oh
That was a surprise I
Surprise that's my first tip. If you want to make your own funny home video always use the element of surprise
now
Get that barbecue clay that's mrs. Floyd. Hey, let's go inside and surprise her
I'm hiding in the closet to illustrate the element of surprise now any second mrs. Floyd is gonna be opening the closet. I
hear something
Don't you just hate when that happens
Right funky 30 40. Thanks, junior. Oh
I can hardly walk. Oh
Well, junior is gonna help me show you a safe trick to surprise your audience now
It's called a jump cut
We call it that in the business because you're you're jumping from one bit of action to another bit of action
But remember the key is to always have your camera locked off on the tripod so it doesn't move
All right now junior, I want you to sit down
Please
Action
Well
Pretty dumb trick, huh?
Well, hey, let's see what happens if we stop the camcorder and start it up again
That's called editing in the camera boy, I'll tell you there's no entity amount of surprises you can pull with that drink
Oh boy, am I embarrassed I better make myself disappear
And you can make things reappear
Boy, I sure could go for a nice cold beer right now
You know what go with this a nice good smoke
Ah
And to top it all off mmm a couple of gorgeous babes
Oh
Alright you better get out of here quick
I've got to pick up sissy's birthday present. Please get the barbecue clean. The party starts at six o'clock
Yes, dear clean the barbecue. Yeah
Cleaning barbecues. Oh boy. I'll tell you there's no yucks in that
But you know what cracks the count up?
Babies, that's right. Babies, especially babies like baby Floyd
Say hello to the people out there in video then baby Floyd
Hello everyone in video land. I want you to make sure to tell all your friends to buy this video so that you can send me to college
College boy, I'll tell you that's some smart baby, but you know, we want to make him one funny, baby
So, let's see what we can do. Let's improvise, huh?
All right, we'll start by putting him in this waiting pool
There we are. Oh
Look at that
All right
Well, I'm not in stitches yet. But how about if we lower the angle and I'll just
Put it right down on the ground here and then maybe get in a little bit closer
There we are
Now, how about if we put a shark in the pool?
And then then then then then then then then then then then then then then get a music
Boy that's scary stuff too, huh and funny
Oh boy, I'll tell you I love this baby. And you know, what's funnier than a baby two babies
Hey, look at the way that babe is drooling over me over you get your eyes examined pal
Oh, yeah. Well, what's this? Hey gorgeous. What are you doing at the nap time?
Yeah, well same to you. Yeah, she wasn't my type. Anyway
All right, so it wasn't side-splitting hilarity, but it was cute
I'll tell you that trick saved John Travolta's career and it could work for you, too
Boy, I'm telling you, it's not funny at all. It's not funny at all
And it could work for you, too boy. I'm telling you there's a million funny things you can do with babies, right?
I would go sell here with a grudge match of the century in there
You saw it the blonde bomber is taking on the armed lady and he's wrapped her up like a pancake
There and she retaliates. I can't take this anymore. They ought to pay. This is too violent
Yeah, boy kids are funny and they're great to improvise with too
Now look, you've got all sorts of funny props lying around the house. So use them
I'll show you what I mean. Let's see. All right here. What's this? Uh, a simple squeezed mustard bottle watch
Now floyd, what do you think of mommy's cooking, huh?
Oh boy, there's got to be an easier way of making a buck
Oh
Well now
What do we learn so far? Well
Surprise is funny and babies are funny
But remember comedy in the hands of an amateur can be a dangerous weapon
Now i'm going to share with you some of the tips we professional video makers use
First i'm going to tell you about the different types of shots
This is a pan
This is a dolly
Oh, sorry about that
Boy, my neighbor's gonna be cheesed off at me
anyway
If you want to make good funny videos, you've got to know your camera basics
Not very funny, huh? Why because it's a wide shot
But now let's zoom in for a close-up
Oh, that's a lot better see close-up is much better for a reaction shot. Look at the look on that guy's kisser
Ha ha ha or we could do what we call a reveal take your time revealing what's funny now watch this
Ha ha see now that's funny
Ha ha ha. Oh, this is a perfect time to show you the effective use of handheld camera
Gotta get out of here
Junior hit it your old man's in real trouble this time. Come on. Let me get on that wagon
Oh boy, this is I love these exciting chase scenes
Which brings us back to another video technique the dolly shot and this is a real dolly too
You know as a cameraman
It's nice to be able to relax doing the often arduous shooting of these hilarious home videos
Whoa
Oh, i'm gonna get some good shots this time
Boy, but you're scared for a second, huh? You thought the count bought the farm
Well, no, I was just demonstrating how you can get a big laugh from a really cheap effect
Dummies, that's right
A cheap dummy can get you a huge laugh
Oh and speaking of cheap dummies, I gotta get back to the house and get that barbecue ready for my daughter's birthday party
Floyd cut the ow and clean the barbecue
Oh, well, maybe I can kill two birds with one stone
I'll make mrs. Floyd happy and at the same time demonstrate how a simple everyday object can be made funny
I don't think that thing's gonna be too funny. What's the count gonna do?
What's the count gonna do? Hey
It's it's duke the count's canine companion
Come on, duke. Come on here. Come to your master. Come on, boy
Come come
Doki, come on. I'm not gonna bite you. Get over here. Come on
Oh boy this
Come on duke do some tricks get him laughing get him rolling in the owls haven't begging for more
Begging for more. All right, maybe it's not that funny, but watch what I can do by changing the camera angle
Well, even if he's just sitting there you can make your dog hilarious yeah, i'm not hilarious but but watch this
Cujo
Well kujo down kujo. Well if it worked for stephen king it could work for the count
Fasten your seatbelts ladies and gentlemen, we can have a little turbulence
Smooth we vulcans find humor illogical captain kirk
Oh
Boy i'm telling you you can't lose with pets dogs cats gerbils fish even horses
Oh, look at that. Mr. Red guy all he needed was one cheap idea and a stable full of riders
stable full of riders
But you say count. Oh, that's a high budget show and how can I do this in my backyard? Well, it's simple watch
Hey duke have a jujube
Me hey folks i'm duke the dog and I want to make sure you tell all your friends
To buy this video so the count can make a real killing and send me to obedience school
Boy boy that jujube trick is sure so doggone funny. It's
Doggone funny
I can't believe I said that
All right
Now the count wants to introduce you to a new
New revolutionary video concept. Oh, this is a good one. It's called juxtaposition
Oh, that's right
juxtaposition
Now what is that?
Well, that's when you take two things that don't normally go together and you put them side by side like well
Um dogs and cats
All right, what juxtaposition is this beauty and the beast and no cracks about which is which
Hello is anybody listening is anybody there
I'm here to tell my husband count floyd that i've gone to pick up sissy and her friends and that he better have everything ready
When I get back that includes the barbecue and the decorations. Do I make myself clear?
Oh
I love that hot scandinavian blood, but I think she means business
Boy, I better get cooking. Hey cooking cooking with the count. Yeah, well, we can make a million. Don't you think hadouk?
Hey
It just struck me. Everybody loves sports and everybody loves sports videos
It's count floyd's video
Love sports and everybody loves sports videos. It's count floyd's rockum sockum basketball highlight video
junior
Get the camera and catch your old man in action. Wait a second. That wasn't you
Oh, yes, it was no it wasn't. Yeah, it was me. All right was not was too was not was too wasn't you don't believe me
Watch this
Yeah
Oh wait is that he's out cold and mom's home
Oh, give me that camera i've got work to do come on. Oh boy
Well, looks like the count is done for the count
Count down for the key get it
Oh boy mrs floyd and my daughter sissy are expecting a big birthday barbecue. What am I gonna do?
Hey, wait a minute
Boy don't be a chicken keep your cape on count a chicken cape on
Why do I do these jokes? Anyway
Boy, I know what I can do. This is my video. I can do anything I want
I'll use some of the tricks I showed you earlier
Oh, don't worry, my neighbor won't mind my borrowing his barbecue. We're old army buddies
Hehehe besides he's got a great sense of humor, but the count's not finished yet
Watch this
Come on, this is my daughter. We're talking about never our real cake
That's more like it
Oh, oh surprise princess come to the count
That's what I like to see green
Oh
Junior come on over here. Give your old man a hand. Come on. Take the camera
There we are
Now it's time for the grand finale
Yes, the count's gonna give you some tips on how to shoot the big event like uh, well weddings birthday parties bar mitzvahs
Even divorces which the count almost got himself today, but he didn't because of the magic of video
Now remember video has no limits when you use the magic of your imagination
Now before you begin you're going to need a scenario or in simpler terms a plan
Now remember you're telling a story in pictures and this story is of a birthday party
So first you want to establish the scene
in a wide shot
We professionals call it an establishing shot
Now next you should introduce your cast move in closer. So you get a good look at their beautiful excited young faces
Well
So far we've introduced the scenario and the cast but if you ask me, it's
Pretty boring not a lot of yucks there
Now all the great directors from oh capra to coppola to the count understand that
Conflict is the catalyst of every great story. So watch as I turn this
Ordinary home video
Into a belly-busting laugh riot with just two words. That's right two
Immortal words that change the face of comedy forever
Food fight
Okay kids time to clean up everyone into the pool
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh boy i'm telling you
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Come on you little brat
Junior
Junior I forgot about the most important. Look kids. Get out of here. Beat it. Just beat it. Take a walk
I forgot about the most important part of any movie the stunt now. Come on get up
I'm gonna teach you how to stage a stunt fight safely so that nobody gets hurt. Okay. All right now make a fist
That's it. Now stretch your arm out to about my nose
Okay. Now what i'm gonna do is back up about four inches now. You're gonna take a swing at me
Okay, i'm gonna jerk my head back. So aim right here. Go ahead now. Give it a shot
Oh, did you see that was great. Oh boy. Now there's an even better angle for that. Mrs. Floyd
You want to come around behind him? That's it. This is called an over the shoulder shot. We call it that in the business
Okay, so same thing. I want you to take a swing at me. Go ahead. Try one style
Boy perfect. You really tagged me that time junior boy an excellent angle, but there's an even better one. Mrs
Floyd, we're gonna do a reverse over the shoulder shot. So you come around here. Come on. That's it. Oh, by the way
A stunt is a collaboration. It's a work of art between the stunt man myself and the cameraman
So you've got to work in collaboration. Okay junior. I want you to give me a good shot right in the kisser
Give it a try. Go ahead. Oh
Well, I think that's enough video tips for today
So until the count sees you next time in his funniest summer vacation video
Which is a good one a lot better than this
Oh, that's a wrap
Yeah, yeah
Well, look max you tell plofsky if he wants the merchandising rights and a two-year option
He's got the belly up with a lot more cash than that
Yeah, I tell you the count's gonna be hot stuff once his video hits the streets. It's
Hey
Turn it off
No, no, no pictures. No pictures
So
So
So
You
You