Welcome to the Foot Locker House of Hoops.
Today we're going to install a fire prevention system.
Hey, Alan, how's it coming?
All fire systems go, Nora.
Well, let's give it a test, shall we?
Cool.
Boy, Alan, sure is hot.
Just like this Nike Air Diversity Up Tempo,
which you can only get at Foot Locker.
Well, that's all for the House of Hoops.
Out of room! Out of room! Out of room, please! I want fire!
So far, over 5 million people have come face to face
with their final destination.
Now, it's your turn.
We will die.
Roger Ebert and the movies give Final Destination two thumbs up.
I'm not gonna let it happen, okay?
It's like Scream, but better.
The L.A. Times calls it swift and scary.
Clear!
The superior thriller.
Terrifyingly real.
Get out!
Get back!
Final Destination.
Rated R.
You can do something about overcrowded schools.
Fill out your census.
It helps determine public funding for schools.
This is your future. Don't leave it blank.
Fox Totally Twisted Tuesday continues.
I come bearing a gift.
It's in my diaper and it's not a toaster.
An all-new Family Guy tonight at 930, 830 Central.
For the latest news, traffic and weather,
watch Good Day New York.
Weekday morning starting at 7 a.m. on Fox 5.
Sunday, get your tailgate party ready for Fox's homecoming game.
Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?
The real might have died of loneliness.
The Simpsons. Then, the thrill.
Here they come!
The wonder.
Do we at least get to see any flaming bricks?
It's about the building of man and machine.
Racks are just sort of a bonus.
The paper.
What happened?
Spend a day at the races.
These are the worst kids I have ever encountered in my life.
And I worked the state fair.
An all-new Malcolm in the Middle.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Sunday.
Party of five will not be seen tonight,
but will return next Tuesday with the first of six all-new episodes.
Now, Totally Twisted Tuesday continues with a classic That 70s show.
Give me your brandies!
Whoa!
Followed by another all-new Family Guy.
All starting right now on Fox.
Can Sprite make you a more extreme mountain biker?
Not if you don't stay on your bike.
All Sprite does is quench your thirst.
Maybe those sharp, porny rocks will stop him.
Oh!
Nope.
Grape Nuts O is even surprised at folks here at Post.
Oh, a taste that's light and toasty with a touch of brown sugar.
From Grape Nuts?
Oh!
We had the same reaction.
Grape Nuts O is cereal.
A whole new spin on Grape Nuts.
A flawless makeup or incredible skin improvement?
Nutrigena Healthy Skin Makeup is both.
Clean, light, dermatologist developed.
Clinically proven to improve skin every time you wear it for flawless fit.
Fabulous skin. Healthy skin makeup.
Beautiful, beneficial, Nutrigena.
It could happen to anyone.
Get off of me!
What would you do if it happened to you?
He can't get away with it.
Get real all new tomorrow at 9 on FOX.
In the battle to prevent the gum disease gingivitis,
floss goes a long way.
Because floss removes plaque between teeth.
But for many, that might not be enough.
To kill the germs brushing and flossing may miss,
use Listerine.
Listerine is the one brand, the only brand
clinically proven to flow into the tiny spaces between teeth.
To kill germs and help prevent the gum disease gingivitis,
stand up to gum disease.
Get in here and fight.
With Listerine, don't let a good mouth go bad.
Mascara. Love the look.
Hate the stiff, brittle lashes.
New full and soft mascara from Maybelline.
The soft wax formula keeps lashes soft.
Not dried out or brittle.
New full and soft mascara.
Introducing the biggest, boldest player in the Colonel's Sandwich line-up.
A spicy, triple-crunch singer.
Not one, not two, but three big strips of white meat chicken.
Plus the Colonel's spicy singer sauce.
Try one today for just $1.99.
Boo-ya!
The world's funniest game show moments.
What is the one thing he forbids you to put on his wiener?
Onions.
Pancake.
Tomorrow at 8, 7 Central on Fox.
He doesn't care that Hyundai has America's best warranty.
The warranty that means you don't have to worry about your car for 10 years.
But you care.
You're different.
You're a lot more intelligent.
Freedom, freedom.
The new Elantra from Hyundai.
With the freedom of America's best warranty.
Freedom, freedom.
You can work up quite an appetite saving the planet from certain disaster.
So what do you give a superhero for dinner?
The same thing you give a superhero's dad.
Cheddar cheese melt from Hamburger Helper.
With a mouth-watering cheddar cheese sauce.
And lots of hearty pasta that'll make the whole family happy.
Now who's the hero?
Hamburger Helper from Betty Crocker.
What a great idea.
So what are you going to do for dinner tonight?
The answer's as easy as KFC.
Introducing the Colonel's Double Matt Mega Meal.
For a very short time only, the Colonel's piling on the food and lowering the price.
Woo!
Colonel's gonna double up on the mashed potatoes.
Get eight pieces of the Colonel's chicken.
Two large mashed potatoes with gravy.
Another large side.
Four freshly baked biscuits.
And a double chocolate chip cake.
All for just $15.99.
Want a new chicken, right?
At a right good price?
Come see me.
Tonight at 10.
Rip-off.
They have the cheapest gas prices around.
But wait till you see what happens when you try to fuel up.
Plus, wake up call.
A surprising new study may have you changing your sleep habits.
Find out why on the Fox 5 10 o'clock news tonight after Family Guy.
Fox Totally Twisted Tuesday continues.
I come bearing a gift.
It's in my diaper and it's not a toaster.
It's an all-new Family Guy.
Stay tuned for scenes from the next That 70s Show.
Followed by an all-new Family Guy.
I miss you so much.
Ready?
Oh, wait, wait.
New clean and clear oil absorbing sheets.
Instantly remove oil and shine.
Wow.
Without smudging your makeup.
New oil absorbing sheets.
Clean and clear and under control.
Friday.
I know what you did.
The secret is out.
Joshua Jackson.
Somebody help me.
Paul Walker.
No.
Leslie Biv.
What are you going to do?
Calls may be 13.
Start Friday.
Your clothes may be designed for the gentle cycle, but many regular detergents are not.
Gentle Cycle Woolite is designed for the washing machine and there's no shrinking, stretching or fading.
Trust Woolite.
Gentle by design.
Long day?
Try these.
Have a burst of fruit juice and this is just what you need.
Starburst Heart Candy.
Hey.
Cable Dive.
The World Broadcast Premier.
Fox Thursday.
True Carry.
Weeknights at 7 p.m. on Fox 5.
Sunday.
Get your tailgate party ready for Fox's homecoming game.
Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?
The real might have died of loneliness.
The Simpsons.
Then the thrill.
Here they come.
The wonder.
Do we at least get to see any flaming racks?
It's about the melding of man and machine.
The racks are just sort of a bonus.
The danger.
What happened?
Spend a day at the races.
These are the worst kids I have ever encountered in my life and I worked a state fair.
An all new Malcolm in the Middle.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Sunday.
Now Totally Twisted Tuesday continues with another new family guy on Fox.
Last year billions of dollars were spent on emergency equipment.
Unfortunately some communities missed out on this money.
Fill out your census.
It helps determine public funding for emergency equipment.
This is your future.
Don't leave it blank.
Busy morning?
We've got you covered.
Burger King has delicious new pancake minis.
Light buttermilk silver dollar pancakes with rich syrup so you can dip them and eat them on the go.
Just 99 cents for a limited time.
Only at Burger King.
Mmm.
Hot bod.
Fine bod.
I want your bod.
Bod Man Fragrance Brace by Body Fantasies.
Presenting Docker's Stretch.
Sunday get your tailgate party ready for the Fox Homer coming game.
Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?
The view might have died of loneliness.
The Simpsons.
Then how much trouble can you get into at a racetrack?
These are the worst kids I have ever encountered in my life and I worked a state fair.
An all new Malcolm in the Middle.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central Fox Sunday.
On college campuses across America, one secret society has the power to instantly change your life.
You are a skull.
Destroy it.
I want to know the truth.
I may never let him out.
Imagine that.
Joshua Jackson.
They're watching you, they're watching me.
Paul Walker.
You're gonna dig your own grave.
Leslie Bader.
What are you gonna do?
None of us are safe.
The Skulls, rated PG-13, starts Friday in theaters everywhere.
Cable Guy?
He'll hook you up.
Oh, Billy.
Then he'll take you down.
Gin Carrey.
Garland of the land.
And Matthew Broderick.
The world broadcast premiere, The Cable Guy, the Fox Thursday movie at 8, 7 Central.
The GMC Jimmie has a full length steel frame.
A 190 horsepower Vortec engine.
And tows up to 5,600 pounds.
Just what the road needs.
Lease a 2000 Jimmie four wheel drive SLE for as low as $299 a month.
Residency restrictions apply.
Call for lease details.
We've got this online game going.
Speed means survival.
I've got InfoSpeed DSL high speed internet access.
I can get the web on my wireless.
Skinner, we meet again.
Hello, Dr. Swift.
Goodbye.
In a hundredth of a second, you can go from being a winner to...
Come on!
Bell Atlantic custom select combinations.
What you want and only what you want.
In every Kraft single, filled with such fun, the Dairy Fairy puts the yum in calcium.
Two out of three kids don't get the recommended amount of calcium.
Happily, Kraft singles provide calcium kids love.
For the happiest children, trust the Dairy Fairy so fine, who makes every Kraft single utterly divine.
Kraft singles, magic every single time.
Peek-a. Peek-a. Peek-a-choo.
Stay tuned for scenes from the next Family Guy on Fox.
Next at 10, New York's ambulance wars.
Are they putting lives at risk?
Did you hear what the public advocate wants to do to the mayor?
Plus, the gator in the sewer and Ranger fans a big shake up.
What news is next?
With 1-800-Collect, you save a buck or two.
So why doesn't everyone use it?
It's so simple.
You use 1-800-Collect to make that call, right?
Oh, I forgot.
Forgot? You forgot?
1-800-Collect, collect call is so simple.
Well, I've been up all night studying, man.
We were just studying all night.
It's like the number is 1-800-Collect, okay? Right at that.
It'll save you big bucks.
You heard of paper?
Uh, yeah.
1-800-Collect, save a buck or two.
Busy morning? We've got you covered.
Burger King has delicious new pancake minis.
Light buttermilk silver dollar pancakes with rich syrup
so you can dip them and eat them on the go.
Just 99 cents for a limited time.
Only at Burger King.
A good pair of shorts is hard to find unless you know where to look.
All-terrain shorts at Old Navy.
I'm in the mood for good looking.
And while I'm at it, strong, relaxed, rugged.
With built-in bungees and a cargo pocket.
Really, just my type.
Old Navy all-terrain shorts for men and boys.
What's not to love?
Eyes on cameras and sticky film.
New from Polaroid.
Next Tuesday.
So I pulled a little bib and now people think I'm God.
Those fanatics are building a golden idol of one alone.
Wow, I look like a freaking Emmy.
Experience.
Puberty hit you like a ton of wrecks.
The wrath.
They're just like boils.
The plagues. God visited upon Egypt.
Of God.
The water, it turns all red and goopy.
How delightful. It's as if someone stabbed Mr. Bubble.
An epic new family guy.
God is ticked.
830, 730 Central, next Tuesday.
It's 10 p.m.
Do you know where your children are?
Tonight, Tuesday.
Stay tuned for scenes from the next That 70s Show.
Followed by an all-new family guy.
Have you noticed Ms. Clark's bike cuspids?
Talk about white teeth.
I'm too distracted by her sparkling canines.
What about those incisors?
Radiant.
Luminous.
Blinding.
Colgate Whitening toothpaste with tartar control has extra whiteners
for teeth so white, they'll get talked about.
I bet she has really white molars.
For whiter teeth, Colgate Whitening.
Are you ready for some shopping?
Big Kmart dollar days are here.
Get a Samsung microwave, $49.
White Westinghouse appliances, just $8 each.
Unigine cordless phone, $27.
Turbo cycle bikes, $35.
Pokemon T-shirts, wow, $5.
Changing for the better gives us more.
Dollar days at Big K. We shop, we score.
Change, change, change, yeah, for the better.
15 years ago, I gave John his start.
I ordered the first Papa John's pizza.
No, it was me.
I said, John, this pizza's got great stuff on it.
Join our celebration.
Get two large one-topping Papa John's pizzas for just $12.99.
Get it straight, it was me.
I said, this sauce is special.
Me, me, me, me, me.
Hey, wasn't it you that ordered the first pizza?
Well, I am your mom.
Get two large one-topping Papa John's pizzas for only $12.99.
It's our way of thanking all our loyal customers.
For six years, you were there for every triumph and tragedy.
Now be there when the Salingers say goodbye forever.
I'm gonna let you go.
Countdown to the series finale of Party of Five.
If I felt the way you did, I would marry that girl in a heartbeat.
The first of six all-new episodes tonight at 9, 8 Central on Fox.
The Simpsons, weeknights at 7.30 on Fox 5.
Fox Monday.
There's a right way to play poker.
Then there's Jackie's way.
Do you want any cards?
Yeah, can I have two fives, please?
That's 70's show.
Then it's the hit comedy that's darkly funny.
I don't deserve this kind of happiness.
How can I destroy it?
Want some pies?
Okay.
An all-new Titus.
You slept with her?
She said, you want some pie?
I didn't know it was a metaphor.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Monday.
Now, an epic all-new Family Guy on Fox.
Hey, Brandon.
Whoa!
Hey, Brandon.
Hello, Tina.
Hey, Brandon.
The critics declare black and white is one of a kind.
I had a dream about you.
Oh, God!
Electrified, intense, edgy.
Why don't you get back down?
Everybody shut up!
It will blow you away.
Stay right there!
Black and White, Rated R, opens everywhere tomorrow.
Eyes on camera since sticky film.
No from Polaroid.
Hey, neighbor.
Can I borrow some ice?
Yeah, sure.
Hold this.
Yep.
Thanks.
Got any sugar?
Toothbrush?
Air dryer?
With more barbecue and cheddar flavor you can see, more you can taste on every chip and every bite.
New Ruffles Flavor Rush Potato Chips keep you coming back for more.
White Sunlight before day, take with food.
A good pair of shorts is hard to find unless you know where to look.
All-terrain shorts at Old Navy.
I'm in the mood for good looking.
And while I'm at it, strong, relaxed, rugged.
With built-in bungees and a cargo pocket.
Really just my type.
Old Navy All-Terrain Shorts for men and boys.
What's not to love?
All your favorite stars, join Halle Berry, Denzel Washington, and Diana Ross for the Image Awards, Fox Thursday.
And after the show, log on to Fox.com for your chance to win.
Where you going?
Going south.
All right.
Going south.
All right.
It's that time of year again, spring break, and to celebrate, McDonald's Cajun McChicken Sandwich is back.
And it's just a buck.
Food, I need food.
Starting Friday, that spicy Cajun taste you've been missing is as close as the nearest Mickey D's.
Oh, man, we got to eat.
Where are you going to get a great tasting Cajun chicken sandwich for just a buck?
Mickey D's.
Right there, right there.
Two miles.
Did somebody say McDonald's?
Offer ends April 20th.
Not mine.
Nope.
Not mine.
Not me.
That's not me.
Not here.
That's not me.
Hello?
Starting today, everyone can go wireless.
Getting off.
Introducing AT&T National Prepaid Wireless.
With no contracts, no roaming or long distance charges, and even no monthly bill.
You just pay as you go.
Mine.
Not mine.
AT&T National Prepaid Wireless.
Now we can all go wireless.
Perhaps you've noticed, but it seems all across the country, people are discovering a new type of game.
A game that's free, takes around 30 seconds, and lets you win a million dollars.
What's more, it's a game that's fair.
Because the most anyone can play is once a day.
So everyone's odds are even.
And everyone's heads are fuller.
Not so much with dreams of it, but rather, dreams of when.
LuckySurf.com.
For a million fair and square.
Of all the supermarkets in America, there's one that's grown up with more babies than any other.
That's rocked with more moms, enrolled with more strollers, warmed up more bottles, and welcomed more hugs.
That's kissed more cheeks, dried more wet eyes, and patted more bottoms, too.
And from the first step into life to the last step out of babyhood, what we've looked forward to most is being there every step along the way.
A&P. For our family and yours, the best is yet to be.
Just six all-new episodes until Party of Five says goodbye forever.
The countdown to the final farewell coming up next on Fox.
Nintendo 64 six new colors are so amazing, choosing a favorite might be somewhat of a struggle.
Billy?
Which one?
Billy?
Eyes on cameras and sticky film.
New from Polaroid.
Buenos nachos.
Gordy, I didn't know you spoke Spanish.
Are you fluent?
No.
I feel fine.
Meet Gordy and Sean.
People always said I'll never amount to anything.
Hit me, baby, one more time.
Now two dreamers are headed for the big time.
Woof, woof, woof.
Face first.
Sing it.
You chicks rock.
Ready to rumble.
Ready at PG-13.
Starts this Friday at a theater near you.
You are cordially invited to take the Pepsi Challenge.
This summer, we're inviting everyone in America to step up to the plate and take the Pepsi Challenge.
I'm tired.
Are we done yet?
Come on, Junior, I'm just down one duck.
So take the Pepsi Challenge and let your taste decide.
Tonight, it's East against West when the Yankees take on the Anaheim Angels.
Catch the action Yankee Baseball tonight at 10 p.m. on Fox 5.
Fox Sunday, witness a miracle.
Can Homer help Barney stop drinking?
My name is Barney.
I'm an alcoholic.
You want A.A.
This is AAA.
My name is Homer and I'm planning a trip to St. Louis.
And all new Simpsons.
Then, when Mom takes the day off, can the family survive?
It's anarchy, baby.
Before all heck breaks loose.
I was just wondering if you could wash your shirt for me.
Yeah, yeah, I'll wash.
All new Malcolm in the Middle.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Sunday.
Now, the countdown to the series Simpsons on Fox.
Nintendo 64, 6 new colors are so amazing, choosing a favorite might be somewhat of a struggle.
Billy?
Which one?
Billy?
Eyes on cameras and sticky film, new from Polaroid.
Buenos nachos.
Gordy, I didn't know you spoke Spanish.
Are you fluent?
No.
I feel fine.
Meet Gordy and Sean.
People always said I'll never amount to anything.
Hit me, baby, one more time.
Now, two dreamers are headed for the big time.
Woof, woof, woof.
Face first.
Sing it.
E-mail, E-mail.
You chicks rock.
Ready to rumble.
Ready at PG-13.
Starts this Friday at a theater near you.
You are cordially invited to take the Pepsi Challenge.
This summer, we're inviting everyone in America to step up to the plate and take the Pepsi Challenge.
I'm tired.
Are we done yet?
Come on, Junior, I'm just getting warmed up.
So take the Pepsi Challenge and let your taste decide.
Tonight, it's East against West when the Yankees take on the Anaheim Angels.
Catch the action, Yankee Baseball, tonight at 10 p.m. on Fox 5.
Fox Sunday, witness a miracle.
Can Homer help Barney stop drinking?
My name is Barney.
I'm an alcoholic.
You want A.A. This is AAA.
My name is Homer and I'm planning a trip to St. Louis.
And all new Simpsons.
Then, when Mom takes the day off, can the family survive?
It's anarchy, baby.
Before all heck breaks loose?
I was just wondering if you could wash your shirt for me.
Here you go. I'll wash.
All new Malcolm in the Middle.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Sunday.
Now the countdown to the series.
Simpsons on Fox.
The Simpsons is brought to you by 1-800-Collect.
The easy way to say.
Mmm, hot bod.
Fine bod.
I want your bod.
Bod Man Fragrance Brace by Body Fantasies.
When Peter runs for office, will his shocking past be revealed?
Remember when I first noticed girls starting to develop?
All new Family Guy, 830, 730 Central, Fox Tuesday.
Taco Bell introduces wild chalupas and wild gorditas.
Ay caramba.
It's your favorite chalupas and gorditas
covered with our hot and spicy wild sauce.
Caliente.
This is my Puerto Rico.
Come, discover it.
Experience the sounds of 500 years of history.
Feel the sound of adventure.
Enjoy the sound of our beautiful deep ocean.
And the most exciting nightlife in the Caribbean.
Only Puerto Rico sounds like this.
Only Puerto Rico puts it all within your reach.
Good evening, I'm Harry Martin.
Tonight on the 10 o'clock news, it's April,
but it looked a lot like January with all the snow.
Joe Moreno will tell us how long it's going to stick around.
Plus, the Big Apple's real estate market is red hot.
So why are banks giving minorities the cold shoulder when it comes to mortgages?
Love those stories and more tonight at 10.
When mom takes the day off...
I want to take a bubble bath.
Can the family survive?
It's anarchy, baby.
Before all heck breaks loose.
Things have changed, Jack.
What do you mean?
You never laugh anymore.
Of course we laugh.
Oh, Jack.
Do you ever laugh?
Fox Monday.
There's a right way to play poker.
Then there's Jackie's way.
Do you want any cards?
Yeah, can I have two pies, please?
That's 70's show.
Then it's the hit comedy that's darkly funny.
I don't deserve this kind of happiness.
How can I destroy it?
Want some pies?
Okay.
And all new Titus.
You slept with her?
She said, you want some pie?
I didn't know it was a metaphor.
It all starts at 8, 7 Central tomorrow on Fox.
Now the comedy everyone's talking about.
An all new Malcolm on Fox.
I'll say...
But, I mean, you've never really had a steady girlfriend, so...
What's that all about?
I'll tell you what that's all about, Foreman.
My mind is pure, man.
I don't fall victim to the female race.
I'm here.
Sans girlfriend.
Help you guys out.
Then I have a question.
How much masturbation is too much?
No such thing as too much, Fizz.
Yes.
Stay tuned for scenes from the next That 70's Show,
followed by an all new Family Guy.
Fifteen years ago, I gave John his star.
I ordered the first Papa John's Pizza.
No, it was me.
I said, John, this pizza's got great stuff on it.
Join our celebration.
Get two large, one topping Papa John's pizzas for just $12.99.
Get it straight, it was me.
I said, this sauce is special.
Me, me, me, me, me.
Hey, wasn't it you that ordered the first pizza?
Well, I am your mom.
Get two large, one topping Papa John's pizzas for only $12.99.
It's our way of thanking all our loyal customers.
How's this gossip?
We spread it around like they went ahead and had sex.
Well, the party was still going on.
Oh, did you tell somebody that something happened?
Absolutely not.
If you were bragging about it...
I don't need to lie about sex.
Whatever it is that you think I did, I don't know why you think that.
Get out!
He's a murderer.
I didn't do it.
It can turn you on or turn on you.
You're not gonna get away with it this time.
I heard.
Stop.
Gossip, rated R.
Starts Friday, April 21st at a theater near you.
An eight-speaker stereo, just one of over 40 features, now standard on the Volkswagen Golf.
Thank you very much, oh, Mr. Roboto,
for helping me escape when I needed to.
Thank you.
Mascara. Love the look. Hate the stiff, brittle lashes.
New full and soft mascara from Maybelline.
The soft wax formula keeps lashes soft.
Not dried out or brittle.
New full and soft mascara.
Maybelline.
A good pair of shorts is hard to find, unless you know where to look.
All-terrain shorts at Old Navy.
I'm in the mood for good-looking.
And while I'm at it, strong, relaxed, rugged.
With built-in bungees and a cargo pocket.
Really, just my type.
Old Navy all-terrain shorts for men and boys.
What's not to love?
When Peter runs for office, will a shocking past be revealed?
Remember when I first noticed girls starting to develop?
All-new Belly Button.
All-new Family Guy, coming up next on Fox.
Drew Carey, weeknights at 6.30 p.m. on Fox 5.
Fox Monday.
Take the how to please your man quiz.
I didn't get number three because I'm a nurse and number three is icky.
That's 70 Show. Then...
It'll keep the aliens from stealing your thoughts.
It's an all-new Titus.
Geez, Juanita, he looks like a space Jew.
Then, meet the firm's new addition.
This is Mark Albert. He starts today. Let's all give him a warm welcome.
An all-new Allie McBeal. It all starts at 8, 7 Central, Fox Monday.
Now the race is on between Peter and Lois, a new Family Guy on Fox.
Hey, look at this. What is it?
Check this out.
Get the flashlight. Get the flashlight.
Never has so much power gone into our battery.
Duracell Ultra.
The most powerful alkaline battery in the world.
Are you ready for real fear?
Final Destination.
Really terrifying.
Intense.
Shocking.
I'm still shaking.
Final Destination.
Really hard.
Introducing, Docker's recodes.
Buy it Tuesday on video.
Stewart.
The mouse is in the house.
Mom, Dad, I'm home.
Stewart Little.
Wanna be friends?
Talk to the butt.
That's funny.
Buy it on video and DVD, April 18.
Fox Sunday. How do you score a tropical dream vacation?
Join a leopard colony.
Electric needle room.
The Simpsons.
Then, Father's Fear. The Talk.
There's a certain thing that happens between normal people.
No, that doesn't happen. Except maybe the first time.
New Malcolm after the Simpsons.
Starting at 8 Fox Sunday.
I don't wanna scare you.
So I'm going to do this very slowly.
This is an extreme double cheeseburger.
Two flame broiled quarter pound burgers
smothered with two kinds of melted cheese.
Plus a cheese sauce with a very discernible kick.
Not ready to take on this much burger?
That's okay.
It doesn't make you any less of a man.
Got the urge?
Touchstone Pictures' mission to Mars brings you closer to the secrets of the universe.
And Dr. Pepper's got your chance to rocket right out of this world.
Look behind the label of specially marked 20 ounce or 2 liter bottles
or inside 12 packs of Dr. Pepper.
To win the ultimate adventure, the Edge of Space.
Or win any one of thousands of instant prizes including Kawasaki ATVs.
So blast off to the limits of space with Mission to Mars.
Only in theaters. Dr. Pepper makes the world taste better.
You love different strokes. Now the true story.
I'm still a virgin and I'm sick and tired of it.
TV guides truth behind the sitcoms at 8, 7 Central tomorrow on Fox.
Mouth to mouth
She's perfect.
Cheek to cheek
She wants me.
He likes to be touched.
She.
He.
Baby you're my friend.
She's mine.
He's mine.
Sexuality.
Emporia, Omani, the two new fragrances.
Get together.
These gift sets for him and for her.
Available at Macy's.
Where you going?
Going south.
Alright.
Going south.
Alright.
It's that time of year again. Spring break.
And to celebrate, McDonald's Cajun McChicken Sandwich is back.
And it's just a buck.
Food, I need food.
Right now that spicy Cajun taste you've been missing is as close to the nearest Mickey D's.
Oh man, we gotta eat.
Where you gonna get a great tasting Cajun chicken sandwich for just a buck?
Mickey D's!
Right there, right there.
Smile.
Did somebody say McDonald's?
Operand's April 20th.
What happens when someone wins a million bucks?
Do you understand your best man?
Oh really?
On luckysurf.com.
Reginald, that suitcase we have in the vault, it appears as though they need it.
In America.
Lucky Surf is free, takes around 30 seconds.
And because the most you can play is once a day, everyone's odds are even.
So what's in the case?
One million dollars.
Yeah right.
Luckysurf.com.
Great.
For a million, fair and square.
Here at the Bell Atlantic University of 411, our operators are immersed in the art of directory assistance.
In Dallas, stands Meats.
2-1-4, 5-2-2, 1-2-3.
Whenever you need a number, local or national, just dial 411 and let our operators do the rest.
Remember, no two numbers are the same.
She suffered his abuse.
Now, Julia Salinger is about to get even.
You did what?
Just five episodes left.
Party of five, next on Fox.
It's time to fall in love.
With me or my old Navy capris.
So it's a Futurama and King of the Hill.
Then it's The Simpsons and a new Malcolm in the Middle.
Followed by a mysterious new episode of The X-Files.
It all starts right now on Fox.
A good pair of shorts is hard to find, unless you know where to look.
All-terrain shorts at Old Navy.
I'm in the mood for good looking.
And while I'm at it, strong, relaxed, rugged.
With built-in bungees and...
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Eternity for men, Calvin Klein.
Your gift with any $32 eternity for men purchase at Macy's.
Cole's biggest grand opening event ever just got even bigger.
Because we've just opened 14 more stores in New York and Connecticut.
And to celebrate, all Cole's department stores in the tri-state area are having a grand opening sale.
Save 20 to 50% in every department.
Save on all of our most popular brand names for everyone in the family.
Plus get bonus buys through Monday.
During Cole's grand opening sale going on right now.
Don't miss it.
That's more like it.
Cole.
Bobby takes his act on the road.
It's crucial to end on a big joke.
Yeah.
All new King of the Hill.
Coming up next on Fox.
It's 7 a.m. on Fox 5.
All right.
Fox Sunday.
How do you score a tropical dream vacation?
Join a leper colony.
Electric needle room.
The Simpsons.
Then some boys will do anything to win their dream girl.
You look different.
I took a shower.
I knew it.
Son, are you on drugs?
But before love comes the talk.
There's a certain thing that happens between normal healthy people.
No, that doesn't happen.
Except maybe the first time.
New Malcolm after The Simpsons starting tonight at 8 on Fox.
Now the propane comedy stylings of Bobby Hill.
A new King of the Hill on Fox.
They're going to be starting early tomorrow.
They look ready.
People don't like surprises.
That's why they put the prices right up front.
Goodrinch Goodtime savings means great deals like lube oil and filter for only $24.99 or less.
It's a good time to see your select GM Goodrinch dealer.
Me?
I always have a good time around here.
I sent you for toothpaste and light bulbs.
And you come back with this.
And that.
And you got this where?
He got the Kodak digital camera at Big K Mart with color LCD screen, wide angle optical zoom lens, and PC and Mac connectivity.
Plus Sylvania's 13 inch color TV with on screen menu and front AV jacks.
Big values, Big K Mart.
It's how we're changing for the better.
You got this for me.
Would you want an NBA player operating on you?
Handling a nuclear reactor.
Or flying your airplane.
Would you want an NBA player disarming a bomb for you?
Then why do you want one telling you what to drink?
Mascara. Love the look.
Hey, the stiff, brittle lashes that can come with it.
Well, get a feel of this.
New full and soft mascara from Maybelline.
It's more of those lashes we love.
Unbelievably soft.
Maybelline's exclusive soft wax formula keeps lashes soft so they're not dried out or brittle.
It's like I've got a billion lashes.
All outrageously full and soft.
New full and soft mascara from Maybelline.
Maybe she's born with it.
Maybe it's Maybelline.
Fox Thursday.
The smash hit America couldn't stop talking about.
It's racy.
It's provocative.
How far will they go?
We're going for the full mountain.
How much will Fox show?
The world broadcast premiere of the full mountain.
The Fox Thursday movie at 8, 7 Central.
Drew Carey weeknights at 6.30 p.m. on Fox 5.
Easter Sunday, Fox presents the greatest stories ever told.
I need a miracle.
From powerful rulers.
All hail the new captain.
To stories of feast and famine.
So full.
Belly button moving from inny to outy.
Witness the evolution of mankind.
Futurama, King of the Hill, The Simpsons, Malcolm in the Middle, and The X-Files.
The greatest stories ever told start at 7, 6 Central, Fox Sunday.
Now the Griffins take Manhattan.
And all new Family Guy on Fox.
What are you doing?
Get your own Passat.
Right now, get a great lease on a Passat GLS at your local Volkswagen dealer.
And the best part is, you can get a free pass at the local dealer.
And you can get a free pass at the local dealer.
Get a great pass at the local dealer.
Attention, game show fans. Greed has given away over 10 million dollars. And we're just
getting started. This week, these people compete for the richest guaranteed jackpot on network
TV.
Still in need for Greed.
Two million dollars. It's time to get in the game and play along with Greed. All new
at 9-8 Central Fox Friday.
With 1-800-COLLECT, you save a buck or two. So why doesn't everyone use it?
It's so simple.
You use 1-800-COLLECT to make that call, right?
Oh, I forgot.
Forgot? You forgot?
1-800-COLLECT. COLLECT call is so simple.
Well, I've been up all night studying, man.
I've been studying all night.
It's like the number is 1-800-COLLECT. Okay, write it down. It'll save you big bucks.
Have you heard of paper?
Uh, yeah.
1-800-COLLECT. Save a buck or two.
Hey, look at this.
What is it?
Get your flash drive on it.
Huh?
No, but there is one in the country.
You look so mean.
Tления will be the queen.
She'll be the queen.
She will be the queen.
Now, what are you doing here?
Don't do this, you serious?
Seeing little ladyids do something.
Don't look at em.
They'll get mad.
Little lady would be with you.
Watch out.
Watch out, you again.
That's the way to talk.
You have to look to turn them all around.
You should always have one.
They say that it's a mother and daughter shot.
This is a girl cat.
The real deal is solなたin.
Oh.
the Academy Award winner that goes all the way.
But how much will Fox show?
The world broadcast premiere of The Full Monty,
the Fox Thursday movie at eight, seven central.
Where you going?
Going south.
All right.
Going south.
All right.
It's that time of year again, spring break,
and to celebrate McDonald's Cajun McChicken Sandwiches back,
and it's just a buck.
Food, I need food.
Right now that spicy Cajun taste you've been missing
is as close to the nearest Mickey D's.
Oh, man, we got to eat.
You'll get a lot for your money.
Where you going to get a great tasting Cajun
chicken sandwich for just a buck?
Mickey D's.
Mickey.
Right there.
You're mild.
Somebody say McDonald's.
Offer ends April 20th.
Hi, this is Jeff, and this is my review
of Alta Ski Resort, home of Utah's finest snow.
Unfortunately, I'll never know,
because they don't allow snowboarding.
Hey.
I'm sorry, sir, we don't allow snowboarders here.
These are skis.
Please take yourself and your snowboard and get out of here.
Get back.
Snowboarders are not out of control.
Snowboarders are not ruining the snow for anyone,
and snowboarders certainly aren't all punks.
Easy.
What happens when someone wins a million bucks?
You just send your best man.
Oh, really?
On luckysurf.com.
Reginald, that suitcase we have in the vault,
it appears as though they need it in America.
Lucky Surf is free, takes around 30 seconds,
and because the most you can play is once a day,
everyone's odds are even.
So what's in the case?
One million dollars.
You're right.
luckysurf.com.
Brit.
For a million, fair and square.
Where's everybody?
London from 149 to 174 dollars.
Offer ends midnight Thursday.
Call your travel agent or visit Britishairways.com.
They lost their parents.
They lost their innocence.
But the hardest thing they'll ever do is say goodbye.
Next, the countdown to the final farewell continues.
Then tomorrow, catch another Party of Five on its new night.
Just four episodes left.
Party of Five tonight and tomorrow on Fox.
A good pair of shorts is hard to find,
unless you know where to look.
All-terrain shorts at Old Navy.
I'm in the mood for good looking.
And while I'm at it, strong, relaxed, rugged.
With built-in bungees and a cargo pocket.
Really, just my type.
Old Navy all-terrain shorts for men and boys.
What's not to love?
Family Guy is brought to you by Pepsi.
The joy of cola.
Taxi! Taxi!
59th Street video, please.
Oh, you got to get the episode one video.
When tyrants rule by force and men battle to entertain a nation.
One man.
Brothers, stay with me.
Need a reason for a special Tuesday greed?
How about two million of them?
Someone is already spent.
And only greed, next on Fox.
At any given second, in here, it's always Friday.
Boom, boom, boom, boom.
Bang, bang, bang, bang.
Boom, boom, boom, boom.
How, how, how, how.
Right this second, Friday's famous Jack Rill entrees on Fox.
Futurama is brought to you by Burger King.
Got the urge?
This preview contains four slices of hot melted cheese.
A cheese sauce with a real racy kick.
Plus two thick, juicy quarter pound burgers.
That's a lot of meat for national television.
Late pro Malcolm will learn from the best.
His dad?
In street hockey, not clown school.
Malcolm after the Simpsons.
All new starting at 8 tonight on Fox.
Have you ever seen one?
If you think you know fear.
If you think you face pain.
If you think you've seen evil.
Get rolling, Fox.
It's down, it's down, it's way down.
It's falling, sir.
Drop it like a stone.
Down, way down.
Oh, it's down.
Oh, it's way down.
Sometimes down is good.
Presenting Mercada, the new way to shop where prices go down while you watch.
The more people who buy, the lower the price.
Jack, you gotta get in on this deal.
Jack, Jack.
Where's Jack?
Jack?
Drive prices down at Mercada.com.
There's a car out there people are talking about.
World class engineering, contemporary styling, superbly equipped.
It has a fully integrated vehicle response system to help make it behave exactly the way you want it to.
What is this car that gives you such power and control?
It's the new 2000 Seville with the North Star system.
And now Seville comes with an impressive lease.
Call for important lease details.
The 2000 Seville, the power of and, the fusion of design and technology.
Cadillac.
All the world over so easy to see.
People everywhere just wanna be free.
Bell Atlantic Mobile has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
All the world over so easy to see.
People everywhere just wanna be free.
Bell Atlantic Mobile has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
It's the scandal of the year.
Nancy betrays her lover by sleeping with her husband.
Oh my God.
All new King of the Hill.
Coming up next on Fox.
Stay tuned for scenes from the next all new Futurama.
Followed by a new King of the Hill on Fox.
Hey man, check it out.
On Fox 5.
Next Sunday, new buckets of nuggets are sweeping the galaxy.
What's their secret?
Mama.
Can you say vocal chords?
A finger lickin' new Futurama.
Now it's the scandal of the year.
Nancy betrays her lover by sleeping with her husband.
Oh my God.
On an all new King of the Hill.
Coming up next.
Then the Simpsons turn spring break on a beer.
Then to become a roller blade pro, Malcolm will learn from the best.
His dad?
In street hockey, not clown school.
Malcolm in the Middle.
All starting next on Fox.
You've got it, Keatier.
Preteen Sex on the Fox 5 10 o'clock news tomorrow.
Log on to TheSimpsons.com for all your Simpsons global Fan Fest fun.
That would entertain me briefly.
Now, Kid Rock guest stars on an all new Simpsons on Fox.
The 2000 Mars to the outer.
You've got it.
It's waiting.
Okay, Pepsi One with its breakthrough sweetener may not taste exactly like regular cola.
Huh, Pepsi One.
I gotta try that.
But it's close.
Too good to be one calorie, but it is.
What if Hollywood put an X-File on the silver screen?
Who do you see playing you in the movie?
How about Richard Gere?
With Gary Shandley as Mulder and Taya Leone as Scully.
Mulder!
Written and directed by David Duchovny.
You cigarette smoking mackerel snapper.
The X-Files all new at 9, 8 Central tonight on Fox.
Caesar is proud to give you alien stuff.
This Friday, the stage is set.
The lines are drawn.
The battle begins.
At my signal, unleash hell.
From director Ridley Scott.
Gladiator rated R starts this Friday.
All the world over so easy to see People everywhere just wanna be free
Bell Atlantic Mobile has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
All the world over so easy to see People everywhere just wanna be free
Bell Atlantic Mobile has become Verizon Wireless.
Good evening, I'm Harry Martin.
Coming up tonight at 10, a wild shootout and a police chase in the Bronx.
An innocent bystander is wounded, but who fired the bullet that hit him?
Plus a roaring brush fire derails New Jersey transit.
Full service be up and running by morning.
And another delivery driver is shot, but he lived to tell the story.
All that and more tonight at 10.
A lifetime of memories and a last goodbye.
We stayed together so much longer than most families.
Party of five's final farewell, 8, 7 Central, Fox Wednesday.
We widen the stance and tighten the turning radius.
The all-new Yukon is an unusually...
The Simpsons, weeknights at 7.30 on Fox 5.
Thousands of Americans for all your Simpsons global FanFest Fund.
Now, Homer gets laser eye surgery on New Simpsons on Fox.
Has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
All the world over so easy to see People everywhere just wanna be free
Bell Atlantic Motel has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
Tonight at 10, a deadly mystery on Long Island.
A family is found dead inside their home.
Now investigators are trying to find out how it happened.
Plus the calendar says spring, but the thermometer definitely reads summer.
How long will this heat wave last?
And the heat didn't stop people who wanted to say goodbye to the Cardinal.
We'll have those stories and more at 10.
Does this look like the face of a sex offender?
I had computer sex with a 16-year-old.
Was it a big computer or a little Palm Pilot?
All-new Alley, 9-8 Central, tomorrow on Fox.
On the mother of all Fox Sundays.
Is the new nanny stealing Marge's family?
She's going to seduce your husband.
Or is it Verizon Wireless?
Join in.
All the world over so easy to see People everywhere just wanna be free
Bell Atlantic Motel has become Verizon Wireless.
Join in.
Premium cut lumber.
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Other lumber doesn't stack up.
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I used to think you cared about me.
I keep thinking about us before Keen.com.
But now I don't even know who you are anymore.
And don't think I don't hear those calls.
You browsing, clicking, talking live over the phone.
Getting personal advice or answers to computer problems.
I wish you had more computer problems.
Keen.com.
Don't.
Goodbye.
Tonight it's the mother of all Sundays.
All-new episodes of Futurama.
King of the Hill, The Simpsons and Malcolm in the Middle.
Then a mysterious new episode of The X-Files all starting right now on Fox.
Fresh does better, mental's fresh and full of life.
Be cool, be smart.
Yeah, fresh does better, mental's fresh and full of life.
Mentos, the fresh maker.
New 240 horsepower Nissan Pathfinder.
I got to get a new roommate.
Presenting Docker Stretch for Women.
Hey Jen, we're counting on you.
Last weekend in the Army Reserve, I had to refuel six Apache helicopters in 30 minutes.
That got me ready to do battle on Monday.
Hey, not too shabby.
As little as one weekend a month, two weeks a year.
Army Reserve.
Say goodbye.
The final 90210, Fox Wednesday.
Alright suckers, ears up, minds open.
Message from Mrs. Jones.
What if your loved one only said I love you once every four years?
What if you had to fly overseas just to find people who knew you?
That wouldn't be too cool.
Yet that's how y'all treat Michael, Marion and Maurice.
The world's fastest humans.
Our track stars need more love.
The more, the better.
Can you dig it?
I'll dial zero if I were you stranger.
Dial 1-800-T-A-L-L-A-T-T.
For the same low rate every minute everywhere.
Dial 1-800-CALL-A-T-T for clear calls.
Spree!
Tangy, fruity, chewy, spree.
It's a kick in the mouth.
A new hero is coming to Fox Kids.
Action Man this Saturday morning at 930 Eastern, 830 Central and Pacific for one extreme hour.
Connect with yourself.
Achieve new balance.
Remember how simple it used to be to show Mom how much you loved her?
This Mother's Day Verizon Wireless offers a special package to make it easy again.
Get Mom an Audiobox 4000 digital phone for just $39.99.
And for just $29.99 a month, get 100 bonus minutes each month for a total of 300 minutes every month for two years.
Making it one surprisingly sweet Mother's Day.
Visit a Verizon Wireless communication store or call 1-800-775-0045.
Verizon Wireless, join in.
My mother taught me many things.
Life should be savored.
That's my mother.
Love should be forever.
And gifts should always be from the heart.
Now that I'm a mother, I try to teach my sons the same thing.
Hundreds of stores, thousands of possibilities.
The Mother's Day Gift Box from giftcertificates.com.
Boys, are you listening?
Make all your thoughts come true.
Tonight on the Mother of All Sundays, Peggy bears all on the Internet.
Peggy's seat dot com.
All new King of the Hill, next on Fox.
Stay tuned for scenes from the season finale of Futurama, followed by an all new King of the Hill on Fox.
Crazy! Cool! Crazy! Go!
Just play it cool, boy. Real cool.
What if instead of the Trojan horse, it had been the Trojan armadillo?
Would the citizens of Troy still have rolled it into the sand?
Or would they have taken just one look at it and said, what the?
Introducing the all new Mitsubishi Montero.
Nicely equipped at 31,000.
Big, beautiful, room for seven.
All new Mitsubishi Montero. Nicely equipped at 31,000. Big, beautiful, room for seven.
Go!
Fox 5 puts the newest fat-reducing fad to the test.
How does it weigh in? Find out. Watch Fat Busters on the Fox 5 Ten O'Clock News tomorrow.
The universe is being destroyed. Who you gonna call? I'm Al Gore.
There goes the neighborhood.
On the Futurama season finale next Sunday.
Now Peggy bears all on the internet.
Welcome to Peggy's Feed.com.
And all new King of the Hill.
Then on the Mother of All Fox Sundays. Is the nanny stealing Marge's family?
I'm not insane. Run Marge! Run!
A new Simpsons. All starting right now on Fox.