from the gorgeous Hollywood Hills in beautiful sunny Southern California
it's the late late show of Greg Gilberts
ladies and gentlemen, Greg Gilberts
thank you, thank you, welcome, welcome to your late late show
my name is Treggers and tonight on your show, on your late late show
the man who played Jesus tonight on CBS, Jeremy Sisto is here
from Los Angeles, California from K-Rock FM DJ Kevin and Bean are here
and the music of a very talented woman and a very attractive woman, Leona Ness
this is kind of embarrassing, it happened to me last night while I was in bed with my lady making the love
you know that old faux pas of yelling out another woman's name
well it happened to me and honey if you're watching I just want to say
who the hell is Jennifer?
she just yelled Jennifer
it's been reported that the new multi-billion dollar NASA space station is losing altitude
and could crash into the earth up there, the NASA thing
and good news, there's a one in a billion chance it'll crash into NASA right down here
it could stall off the problem
happy birthday to the actor Dennis Hopper, star of Easy Rider
he turned 64 today or 25 in years he actually remembers, you see
you guys like the stamp? you guys like the stamp?
there's a new commemorative stamp coming out featuring Pope John Paul II
one warning, if you lick it you'll go to hell
wait I got one more, I'll give you one more
beginning next fall NBC plans to extend the Today Show by one hour
okay one hour, on the Today Show Extra, supposedly the extra 60 minutes
will be filled with a new segment called What Al Roker Had For Breakfast
oh you're going to hell, here you go
by the way tomorrow, tomorrow on your Lately Show from Road Trip, Tom Green
very excited about that, tonight time permitting
Jeremy Sisto who's Jesus and Kevin and Bean, the DJs who are all dressed up by the way
looks very stupid, thanks buddy
time permitting those two, Jeremy Sisto and then Kevin and Bean, Kevin and Bean knows there's two people
Kevin and Bean, those people will play Yambo
that was lame, okay
you know this miniseries Jesus came on Sunday and tonight and it kicked some buttocks against the competition
but I, over the seven and a half years we've been doing this Lately Show
I've, I have auditioned for the Bull the Beautiful and I got it
I auditioned for Marshall Law, the great Marshall Law show that's no longer here
and I got that and I'm not auditioning tonight, I'm just performing
okay but I want to perform against this guy Jeremy Sisto or with him, he's a great actor
I want to perform with Jesus so let me just try something and let's see how it works
okay this is a performance me and Jeremy Sisto Jesus
music
get your Jesus hats over here, get your Jesus hats
this mother's house is a house of prayer, not a house of praise
Jesus over there, Jesus yeah, alright
not helping me selling hats Jesus, not helping me selling hats
look if it's about your percentage I'm going to give you 30% come on that's fair, come on
alright there we go, I don't know if that made any sense
alright I hope that worked, let's check the news, here we go
in the news is what you buy, Palm Co-Pilot, the personal digital assistant that just sit there
and our top story last night, the New York Democratic Party officially nominated Hillary Clinton to be their candidate for US Senate
I am deeply honored and humbled to accept the nomination of the New York Democratic Party for the United States Senate
and while her probable opponent Rudy Giuliani has been endorsed by the New York Times, Hillary has received the endorsement of Mrs. Giuliani
this marks the only time a first lady has been nominated for public office if you don't count Betty Ford's tenure as the mayor of Muzulvania
Hillary's supporters came out in droves including such luminaries as Christie Brinkley
I love Hillary
Christie went on to say she also likes ponies and shiny metal objects
as soon as the first lady accepted the nomination Rudy Giuliani immediately released this negative campaign ad
Hillary Clinton accepted her nomination for Senate yesterday, don't you think that's a little bit greedy?
next thing you know she'll be accepting wheelchairs from old people and accepting the fur from baby seals
Hillary Clinton, she steals things and hides them in her fat ankles, pay for by friends if you drop to the army
well you'll excuse me for a second I need to make a quick entry into my diary I'll be right back
Dear Giuliani, it's not easy being a 15 year old girl on TV
all of the boys in the audience keep staring at my boobies
in surreal news, terrorist Osama bin Laden has signed a five year $50 million deal with the Pittsburgh Steelers and the White House has turned into a giant canned ham, that was surreal news
and finally rockstar Prince has changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol seven years ago has now changed it back to Prince
I think I speak for everyone when I say I've been calling you Prince the whole time anyway
you know you've been jerked around when suddenly it seems normal to call a guy Prince
in related news George Michael has changed his name to Mrs. Ricky Martin
the news has divided the music industry concerning Prince the one thing they agree on is this Prince plays the best music to get your freak on to
where's your bill? we'll be right back with James O'Curney
go baby go
more cheerleaders
I give you advancing the science of science
can you believe this 77 year old grandmother is out to the ancient killer? betraying her with his first mistake
48 hours Thursday
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can you get calcium without excess fat? find out after this
this reminder is brought to you by Providence Health System in central Washington
calcium helps build strong bones for anyone on a diet the good news is that low and non-fat dairy products do have as much calcium as their high fat versions
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with the Revlon Yeltsin Trag
hi I'm Ron and I'm Todd morning's on 94.5 cat we know you're sick of that commercial so we decided to get rid of it once and for all
still we invite you to tune in we're giving away stacks of cats and a Harley plus classic rock that really rocks
besides if you don't listen this kid's gonna do our commercial
Ron and Todd in the morning non-stop rock all day long 94.5 cat
Friday on your late late show funny man and male chauvinist that says here Adam Carolla is on the show
don't forget in addition tomorrow to Tom Green I believe Carl Lewis will be here Carl Lewis the one that's at gold medal and the music of Shelby Lynn we're very excited
the music of Shelby Lynn we're very excited about Shelby Lynn will be here tonight we're gonna meet Jesus in a moment Jeremy Sistel and let me forewarn you he looks nothing like he did in the miniseries is what they're telling me
and also Kevin and being from K rocker coming up and those good they're gonna play very excited and again they look exactly like they sound
but they're gonna be playing yambo later
I don't know if we have time for this but I'm just gonna go ahead and do it we're gonna come and try another little one of these little audition type performances with Jesus
that's the carpenter he knows everything about fish are those are those fish I'm scared of fish
I'm also scared of boats
there we go there it is the little performance
I love performing
I love performing okay what can I say about my first guest simply put he is Jesus
in the CBS miniseries please welcome Jeremy Sistel
I want that mug I want that mug we'll get it we'll get it how about the hat you don't want the hat no I don't want the hat I just want the mug
what's the other side of the hat I want the hat
congratulations you beat millionaire on Sunday night
it was like the age old battle between wealth now or wealth later
that's a little too deep for this show
that's a little too deep for me actually
what the critics what did they say about it about your performance there was a lot that really like I was very relieved a lot of them really liked it they were very happy
what did Robert Bianco from USA Today say you know oh I don't know Jesus Christ super stud muffin
he called you a hunk a young hunk that's what I said in the audition I said I want to make this Jesus a stud muffin
Michelle Bearden from Tampa Tribune says Jeremy Sistel who had the toughest role of all is a delight sure he's got the looks but his Jesus has a temper loves to laugh and tell a few jokes as well
so you were you were funny in this miniseries well we tried to make him human and then and you know he tried to make him enjoy his friends his disciples if you will
does it bother does it bother people I guess I should ask them you don't look like you did in the miniseries how come
let's see the little flip screen and this is you yeah yeah and then there's me yeah I still think you're still you're still a decent a decent looking man in person without the beard I still think a stud muffin may be going a little too far
I said the same my mother though she liked it are you are you are you a religious guy no no in real life you're not religious you I can't don't you have to be a Christian here to play Jesus or not
I didn't lie in the audition no I mean I was not I was never I mean my father he was raised Catholic but no he was more of a Buddhist and I was I myself have never
Buddhism is funny the miniseries is over by the way right it was just too how many nights is it tonight right but this air is after you think this is air is late I knew there was something like that yeah you did miss it
yeah but they all watched it but I think we can give away then that you're not a Christian because it'll be the way that I died yeah we can give away a lot of these things
I just throw people off
well after after playing after playing the role of Jesus right I mean what do you what do you do next you're gonna like play a cop I play a wife beater no yeah and Jennifer Lopez movie called Angel Eyes with Jim Caviezeal, Luis Mendoca yeah great great great great
I don't care you say Lopez Jennifer Lopez did you already see this I've started I haven't finished she's a great girl I really like her tell me about her tell me about Lopez take a rest because there's a whole I love her she's a sweet we really connected right away she's a great well I think we come from a similar place and then she's just
what kind of similar place you come from what does that mean a similar place in our lives like we grew up in a similar type of situation you know recently in a shootout or something
no here's the thing and we get around whenever you're on the show we get around okay but I want to ask you a serious question did you did you get a good look at it what is it like in person what is it like in person if you have the hips are there and what does it get in the way of filming
I grew up in theater here's the focus and still I was distracted yeah no it's a nice it's a nice fact did she flaunt it or did she cover it up no she's a very real real person she does not flaunt it in any way but still you're distracted what can you do are we done with that part of the interview
let's move on good I hear and I'm excited because you're going to perform you're somewhat of a musician oh no I said yes I care did you get that no what are you going to play well I played Jesus and I wrote this song a little while ago they also sent me over to meet the pope I'm very nervous about this I never played in person
I played Jesus isn't that weird I never thought I would I also met the pope isn't that weird I never thought I would he was really short
it looked like he needed to take a nap isn't that weird I was in the Vatican with Leanne Rhimes isn't that weird I never thought I would
come on everybody what's the first line of that part isn't that weird I played Jesus no it's not that yeah that's it that's my manager Luis
I know you know the story but I hope you walked it anyway come on everybody it's on TBSMA
yeah yeah yeah I like that Jeremy Sisto very nice we'll be right back with five questions right after this let me get something else to ask
Hi, can I help you? I'm a Zyka brother my friends and I were just looking for a place to party
Road Trip
The critics agree Road Trip is hilarious
What the?
If this year says something about marriage
I had sex last night
With a girl
Road Trip
We're all going to see it sooner or later
Let's start this Friday
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Hazard in Hollywood, CBS Friday
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We have him on for the first part, right?
Look, he took off his glasses
My glasses?
He looks more like the Lord now, doesn't he?
Time for 5 questions
Geography, I'm getting punched in the face by a Dodger at Wrigley Field, where am I?
What city am I in? I'm getting punched in the face by a Dodger at Wrigley Field, where am I?
Chicago!
That is correct, Chicago
Boy, I don't know if this is science or anatomy or what this is
What is an abnormal sack-like growth on the body in which matter is retained?
Jeremy, cyst though
Suck, cyst?
Yes, cyst!
No, that was from your managers, I hear them at Wrigley
What are the ingredients in a deviled egg?
Oh, it's like egg and mayonnaise and mustard
Mustard, that's the one, yeah, salt, pepper, mayonnaise, very good
Who is Vigor?
You or Mark McGann, the guy who played John Lennon in the John and Yoko TV movie?
Who is Vigor, you or the guy who played John Lennon?
Wow, that's tough
You played Vigor because that has a lot to do with things
I don't read, I didn't see it
But I'm curious too
Does that work?
Are you saying he's Vigor?
No
Well, who's Vigor?
He's big!
You're Vigor, we can't accept that, you're bigger than he is
You played Jesus
I lose all the way, I lose
I get the humility points, alright?
You've got three out of four, man
Finally, finish this religious song lyric
Okay
You'd better watch out for dinner not to cry
Santa Claus is gonna go bye bye?
No, he's gonna give you a pie?
Better watch out, you'd better not cry
Santa Claus, is it Santa Claus, right?
He's gonna do something, he's gonna get high?
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is coming to town, we can't accept that, but thanks for playing
I thought you grew up, I'm sorry
I could have sworn Santa Claus was gonna get high
Yeah, I thought you grew up in America
So I didn't...
Well, you're gonna come back for Yambo, right?
Yeah!
Big hand for Jeremy Simpson right back with Kevin and Vane!
Good boy, Simon
When your dog is the star of a syndicated comic strip, you get lots of fan mail
Okay, Simon gets most of it
When we ran the strip where Simon snubbed his food, people sent all kinds of dog food
I read the labels and in every bag of Purina One brand beef and rice formula, beef is the number one ingredient
In lots of designer dog foods, it's corn, so...
So, I let Simon try Purina One
I'd say it went over pretty well
Purina One, second to none
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Nice shot
Join Theresa Russell and Stone Cold Steve Austin
At Bridges-Jones-Vegas to see the finale CDF Friday
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When Walker finally says
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Our goal at KIMA News
Is to get the local stories first
Watch KIMA News at 6
With PJ Close and Tara Thomas
Along with the latest in local weather and sports
With Stu Seibel and Alan Sillim
The KIMA News team at 6
Experience you can trust
Next Hollywood Squares
It's easier for a camel to go through the eye of the needle
Than for a rich man
To what?
To date a woman his own age
Watch Memory Manhive
You ask
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers' Keishon Johnson
You know what I'm talking about
And Laura Sangiotomo
You know, she's got a keishon
Hey, don't shoot me
Just watch the next Hollywood Squares
Thursday evening at 6.30
Welcome back
Welcome back, thank you
Millions and millions and millions of Angelinos
Wake up with my next guest every morning
They are the morning guys on K-Rock out here in Los Angeles
Please welcome Kevin and Bane
There they are
It's just our luck
We finally make it on Network TV, we gotta follow Jesus
Thanks Craig, that's rough
Thanks a lot for that
Well, I'm happy you dressed up
You know, we were in the green room and we have never been asked more
We got asked 25 times if we were wearing underwear
Your entire staff, everybody on your staff checked to see if we were wearing underwear
26, are you guys wearing underwear?
Uh, yeah
Let me tell the audience, Dan, you Craig, because we're in the green room with Leona Ness who's coming out here
I love Girls with Decars, first of all
Very attractive, woman wearing a Catholic high school girl outfit
Yes, she is
At least for 20 more minutes
She was back there with Jesus and Jesus was turned on by her, I could tell
And Jesus said, I love that Catholic school girl outfit, you really look sexy
Are you religious, are you Catholic? And she said, no, I'm an atheist
And he said, that's even sexier
Wow, that's like the best possible answer
Jesus is telling her to be an atheist
It sounds like you guys are having fun backstage
We want to come back every day, that's what we're saying, Craig
That sounds good
Which one is Kevin, which one is Vane?
I'm Kevin, this is Vane, V for MTV, lots of samples here
Do you guys wear shorts to work?
Yeah, again, it's the beautiful thing about radio is no one knows
We can't believe how many people are involved in putting on your television show with us
You turn on a microphone and you wing it, you got actual staff
I know, I know
I got an easy job
Very comfortable being on the radio, yeah
And what time do you guys, I think you have a great life, except when I hear what time you get up in the morning
Do you go on air at 6?
5
5?
Yeah, we get up about 3.30 and that does suck, but that's the only part of our life
These guys get up at 3.30 in the morning, Monday through Friday, so what time do you have to force yourself to bed?
4, 4 PM
No, we have a, our traffic person, Lisa May, gets up earlier so that she can watch TV
She tapes stuff from the night before, she gets up at like 1 to watch, you know, West Wing from the night before
When do you guys watch this show, I guess is the key question
Live, we set our lives
Live, I did live
Yeah, yeah, we watch it as it is, you have to do it
Alright, alright
How is your radio show doing in LA?
You know what, surprisingly we are immense, I can't explain it either
It's like, what is it?
It's very popular
I love this answer, tell me what it is
The truth is, among English speaking folks, we're number two
What does that mean?
Number two
There are 12 fairness stations that beat us
Well not 12, not 12, not 12 necessarily, but there are about four stations
Among English speaking you're number two, which is great
Behind Rick D, unfortunately
The disco duck, yeah I know
I didn't know Rick was still with us
He's not, but his show is still doing well
But the English speaking, so, do you guys speak any Spanish?
No
Okay
And that answer works in either language, which is what you prefer
Exactly, now here is the weirdest thing
But we work at a big time rock and roll radio station, that's the cool thing
That's why it's so much fun
K-Rock
Yeah, K-Rock is the real deal
It's a solid station and it's a blast
I am stuck in the 80s
I used to live out here in the 80s, I used to listen to K-Rock
And it was New Order, it was Echo and the Bunny Man, the Smith
We had a DJ that played that music, his name was Richard Blay, but we killed him
Richard Blay
Where do you guys
I wanted to ask you about, one of you lives outside of Los Angeles, which is unheard of
That's true
Kevin lives and works here in Southern California
I moved last year to Seattle with my lovely wife Donna
And we live on a little farm up there
And a lot of people say, well you know, why would you move away if you've got this job in LA?
I work from up there, still do the radio show to be heard each morning here
The state of California didn't understand our kind of love, Craig, and they asked me to move on
Really?
Yeah, essentially it's what it was
I tell you, it ruins, I picture you guys sitting next to each other in the morning or in each other's laps
We used to cuddle
It throws me off
Well, people are often surprised to find out that we dated in the early 90s
We broke up, and for the love of the show, we put that behind us and we still entertain
Tell me, tell me the, we've got to hustle, but tell me the Ray Romano story on, who wants to be a millionaire?
I don't know that we have time for that story
I live near Ray Romano, and he said he was going to be on the celebrity who wants to be a millionaire
So I said, Ray, my partner, Bean, has a computer for a mic, you have to use him for a lifeline
If you get to that point in the show where you've got to call somebody, this is your man
You know everything
I think you all see where this is headed
Yeah
Actually, I think we brought a clip, did we not bring a clip up for your attendance?
This is Ray Romano on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire
What is the capital of the College of Georgia? Let's call this radio guy
He's a friend of mine, he has a radio station, called the Kevin and Bean Show, his name is Bean Baxter
You know, I know this guy
You know?
Bean's on the line
Supposedly smart, supposedly he's smart
Alright, AC&T, get us the Bean Man
What is the capital of the Republic of Georgia?
Sophia Milneus Tbilisi Halim
Yeah, Tia Freed just will accept Atlanta
Wow, wow
So, I went from I'm the guy who's going to look smart on national TV to the man who let America down
Now here's the point, he's at $125,000
He answers that correctly, he gets $250,000, a charity thing for the D.A.R.E. program in New York
So basically my friend Bean here not only upset my friend, but he also took $125,000 away from the kids
That is it, I might as well be a pusher the way it looks now, you know what I'm saying?
Get right out of there
A pusher, I like this
Stick around, when we come back, this is very exciting, Jesus is coming back, you guys are taking on Jesus in the Ambo
We're going to kick some ass
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There's business in the air
The Big Kahuna confirms Kevin Spacey as a great American movie star
Danny DeVito gives the best performance of his career
Surprise!
The Big Kahuna, made it R, starts Friday
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Only one show, that goes right to biggest questions
You don't think you should yadda yadda
What?
Are you still master of your domain?
Am I so sane that you just blew your mind?
I'm here with some funniest questions from the funniest show on television, five times a week
We're going to have Kevin and Bean play against Jesus Jeremy Sisto in the very popular game, if you're ready, it is called Yambo
It's time for Yambo, the brain-feeding game of skill and intelligence where Craig gets, Jeremy Sisto and Kevin and Bean will face off against each other and against the clock
When the music stops, each player will have three seconds to answer Craig's question
Get three wrong and you lose, three right and you win
Get ready, it's Yambo time
Incorrect
Who is the mayor of McDonald land?
Mayor McKeith
That's correct
What Beatles first name had two syllables?
What?
Beatles first name had two syllables
Ringo
That's correct
What's longer, a mile or a kilometer?
Mile
That is correct
Who invented the telephone?
John
Incorrect
What is the capital of the Republic of Georgia?
When you accept Atlanta
What? Atlanta?
No
Wow, this is tough
What is the meaning of life?
Craig
Ben
Jerry
It's simple, the meaning of life is to love others as you love yourself
Love myself by the way
Are you kidding Jeremy? I'm a bundle of self-loathing, I could never love myself
Sorry, my fault
Let me try another
Do good, that's it, just do good
What are you guys thinking?
That's bullshit man
Okay, here's one that's easy to relate to for y'all
The meaning of life is anaconda cover in a white dress
Sorry, did I say a white dress?
Yes
I'm at the red dress
You're the winner, that is correct right there
We have a winner, Jeremy Sisto is the winner of tonight's Yombo
Congratulations Jeremy, you are one of life's winners
We'll be right back
This summer, anything is possible
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I'm thankful, I'm thankful
The Discover Card gives you a yearly cash back bonus award
When it arrives, people seem to really appreciate it
Lady please
Cash, there's always something more to discover
On Wednesday, May 31st
Let's do it
We're stranding 16 real people on a remote island
They've been given two minutes to salvage whatever they can off this boat
They'll compete for one million dollars
And once a week, vote to see who's safe and who goes
Who will be the ultimate survivor coming to CBS May 31st
Music
Welcome back
Here to perform Charm Attack from the album, Pulmatize
It's your network television debut
This is Leona Ness
Music
Come join the fun and excitement of the 28th annual Ellensburg National Art Show and Auction
In the heart of the beautiful Kittitas Valley
The Western Art Association invites you to their annual show with over 75 artists exhibits
Everything from western to wildlife and many at affordable prices
A favorite for years, plan to attend the Ellensburg National Art Show and Auction
The 19th, 20th and 21st
Free admission to the exhibits for all
Hope to see you there
Yakima Neighborhood Health Services has grown
Now offering more doctors and more appointments
Our staff are full time physicians including one of the valleys largest group of pediatricians
Provides for all ages, children, renal, family practice and dental care
We welcome those on Medicare, Medicaid and most insurances
And offer discounts to those without insurance
Hours include evenings and Saturdays
Call Yakima Neighborhood Health Services today
Our staff speaks your language
The new owners of the Zilla Cherry Patch invite you out to the new remodeled store during the grand opening
They have assorted Tessie cubes for only $5.98 plus 32 ounce Tessie fountain drinks for only $0.49
While you're there fill up your tank with 76 decimals and try the Cherry Patch burger
Don't forget to register for the prize giveaways including a mountain bike, color TV,
certificates of wisdom, jack lot and not a drawing for a free tank of gas
And on Saturday May 20th there will be a race car on site plus free hot dogs and Tessie
Don't miss the grand opening at the Zilla Cherry Patch
I'm Dave Edler, pastor of Yakima Forest Fork Church
God has been transforming men, women and families for centuries
He's still doing it today
Almost daily I hear incredible stories of how God is working in the lives of everyday ordinary people
Doing incredible awesome things
Giving them hope and promise and purpose
Come and join us on Saturday night or Sunday morning at Yakima Fork Fork Church
A place where we love men, train and send
That's our show for the night
Join us tomorrow night
Olympic gold medalist Carl Lewis will be here
The music of Shelby Lynn and Mr. Tom Green tomorrow night
Good night everybody