Something's coming. Something evil.
Consider the consequences if it came from the same planet that enslaved my people.
Alienation, Monday on FOX.
Confusing, isn't it? Making sense of all these nutritional fads.
Seems like a new one comes along every day. Who wants to guess about nutrition?
And that's where the Surgeon General of the United States comes in, with seven guidelines for nutritious eating.
And Whole Wheat Total meets all seven. Every. Single. One.
Whole wheat total. As far as I'm concerned, total takes the guesswork out of nutrition.
Maytags are built to last longer and need fewer repairs, which may explain why in an independent survey,
when asked to name the washer they wanted most, more Americans said Maytag than any other brand.
And when asked to name the dryer they wanted most, more Americans said Maytag again, which makes all of us at Maytag very happy.
Well, almost all of us. It's slow and look at the top.
Maytag, the dependability people. There is a place that fish lovers know where all the fish is hand-selected.
Good evening. May I tell you about our fresh catch?
Tonight we have shrimp, crab, sardines, and a very nice macro. Why don't I bring you a selection we can all have a taste?
Introducing fresh catch. Real seafood, hand-selected, just for cats.
If you were a cat, you'd never want anything but fresh catch.
Have you heard somebody implying they're a thicker sauce than ragu? Well, the truth always comes crashing down.
Ragu Thick and Hearty Spaghetti Sauce. If you want thick, rich taste, it's the thickest you can buy. And that's the truth.
When your skin gets this dry, now there's new, improved Vaseline Intensive Care. It heals rough, dry skin fast.
New, improved Vaseline Intensive Care lotion, now with more healing ingredients.
Jezebel will continue after these few messages.
The prestigious New England Journal of Medicine reports that subjects receiving recombinant HGH experienced a significant decrease in body fat.
Our exclusive HGH 3X formula helps work with our body to release hormones that dissolve fat away.
It's amazing because I never really thought losing weight can be that easy without being hungry.
When I started HGH, within a month, 20 pounds went off.
I like waking up in the morning and seeing that extra pound, pound and a half off. For me, I saw results that quick.
This product, since it is taken at night, will burn the fat while you sleep.
Because HGH has the three essential amino acids, these amino acids have a direct effect on the metabolism of fat.
We call it lipolysis in the medical profession. It means literally burning fat.
HGH 3X is backed with an unconditional 30-day money-back guarantee.
If for any reason you're not satisfied with the results, you get your money back.
No questions asked. It's that simple. Call now to order your 50-day supply. Only $39.95.
There aren't any drugs in it, and there are no side effects.
I've tried others, and they make you hyper, or they have side effects. This doesn't.
I don't feel drug out through the day like other diets do.
It makes a person feel good to know that there is actually something out on the market that's not going to cost you arm and leg,
and you'll lose weight, and you'll feel better, you'll look better, and you'll have more confidence in yourself.
You can take advantage of this quick, easy, and natural weight loss program by calling now.
HGH 3X is produced exclusively for Nutrition Science Institute and is only available in your market through this offer. Call now.
The HGH has been for me nothing short of miraculous.
I feel great. My energy levels up, and my self-esteem. It's nice to have a waist again. I'm not a blimp anymore.
Come on in to a light, sunny freshness from Downey.
Come on in to sun rinse fresh. It's like hanging your wash in the sunshine. Sun rinse Downey with the fluffiest softness. You can see Downey softens best.
Come on in, smell the sunshine. Light and sunny, sun rinse fresh. Downey, April Fresh, and light sun rinse fresh, too.
Come on in to the sunshine.
The Keebler Elves, now in oatmeal, too.
Why is grapefruit juice like the Florida sun? Well, grapefruit juice isn't a red-hot fireball in the sky, but it will brighten up your day and put a sparkle in your eye.
And while it's true that Florida grapefruit juice won't give you a tan on the outside, its cool, refreshing taste will make you glow on the inside.
So, for the perfect refreshment anytime, let the sun go down, and be sure to stock up on the delicious taste of 100% pure Florida grapefruit juice.
Jezebel will continue after these few messages.
If you're in a collision and it's the other guy's fault, dealing with the other guy's insurance company might not be so easy.
Well, sir, after reviewing your case, it appears we owe you exactly half, since you are, of course, half at fault. Well, if you just stayed home, this never would have happened.
If you're in a collision, what are you entitled to? At Kaiser & Douglas, we primarily limit our practice to helping victims of injuries on or off the job.
Your first visit is free, and there's no obligation. Kaiser & Douglas, we're here to help.
Introducing the TummySizer Direct from Switzerland. It's the world's first precision technology that actually flattens your stomach without strenuous exercise.
Simply put on the TummySizer, gently extend your abdominal muscles, and immediately feel firm and soothing pressure.
Adjust the degree of tension you require as your upper and lower abdominals quickly firm and flatten. Comes complete with automatic ventilator.
Use the TummySizer absolutely anywhere. See results in minutes a day.
The TummySizer is available for the first time in the United States at the incredible introductory offer of only $19.95.
If it worked for me, it will work for you. Yeah, I'd recommend it. Do what I did. Order now.
Have the tummy of your dreams with no strenuous exercise or fear of back injury.
Operators are standing by. Order the Swiss Precision TummySizer now.
To order your own Swiss Precision TummySizer on your Visa or MasterCard, just call toll-free 1-800-327-9202.
Or send just $19.95 plus $4 postage and handling to TummySizer, PO Box 2503, Mission, Kansas 66201.
This special offer is not sold in stores and comes with a 30-day money-back guarantee. Just call toll-free 1-800-327-9202.
Are you tired of people screaming at you about sales? The bigger the sale, the louder they scream.
Well, Spas and Saunas of Yakima is having a rest and relaxation sale.
Buy a 1990 Pacific Marquis Spa on sale today, and they'll give you absolutely free your choice of a Soma flotation mattress,
Interspring mattress set, or an ozinator for your new spa.
Now that's big, and we're not screaming. The rest and relaxation sale going on today at Spas and Saunas of Yakima, 201 South First Street.
I like the taste of milk.
As a matter of fact, I use it every morning on my cereal.
When it comes to my coffee, I like this even better. Coffee Mate makes my coffee taste rich, smooth, and creamy.
That's the fact.
Milk in my cereal, Coffee Mate in my coffee. Make sense to me?
Coffee Mate from Carnation. What you put in coffee, even when there's milk around.
Just give me honest work at honest pay. Honest sweat from a hard earned day, and when I'm through, that's when I'll say.
I want my clean as real as ivory. It's gotta be 99.44. I want my clean as real as ivory. Nothing less, nothing more.
No deodorants, no heavy perfumes. That's a real clean. That's ivory.
It's gotta be pure, that's for sure. I want my clean as real as ivory.
What's the secret to Pop Secret microwave popcorn?
Perfect popcorn popped under perfect conditions. Pop Secret leaves very few on popcorns.
Pop Secret from Betty Crocker. It's the only way to pop.
Now, Pop Secret knows the secret to winning great prizes instantly.
Prizes like Hawaiian Tropic Sun Care products, a cruise on Carnival, or $25,000.
The Pop to Win game is on every bag, so to win.
Treat yourself like you should. Treat yourself oh so good.
With chocolate kudos, granola snack. There's pleasure so big and light.
You'll love the whole great crunch and nuts in every bite.
Crudo mid-chocolate, everything it should. So treat yourself oh so good.
Jezebel will continue after these few messages.
Baby, you just ain't changed into nothing yet.
The hottest new album of the decade is burning up the airwaves.
This is Guitar Rock, a giant four-record set.
Float on the water. Hot blooded jacket to see.
Smoking in the boardroom. Sweet home, now I'm home.
In the sunshine of your mind.
Wake up, Maggie, I think I got something to say to you.
Come on, step on my brain.
You're not breaking a love.
American woman, stay away from me.
Guitar Rock is like no other collection on four LPs or two double-link cassettes, 1999.
Two compact discs, $24.99.
Nothing rocks harder or louder.
Have your credit card ready. Here's how to order.
Call 1-800-825-0612 or send 1999 for four records or two cassettes or $24.99 for two compact discs.
Plus $4 shipping and handling to Guitar Rock, PO Box 5155, Department 851, FDR Station, New York, New York.