Guys, lunch is almost ready! Check this out! We've got low-salt snacks, low-sugar jelly. What a mom! Hey, I worry about giving them too much salt and sugar. Yeah, I know what you mean. I'd love to try a peanut butter with less. Oh, that tastes really good. Right, here's one. Simply GIF? Mm-hmm, it's new. Introducing Simply GIF, with 50% less added sugar and salt. 50% less than any leading regular brand. And a whole lot of fresh roasted peanut taste. Mmm, I had no idea this could taste so good. Hey, it's from GIF. Yeah, you know, I feel really good about this. Sort of it? It tastes great, Mom. They're good, sweetie. New Simply GIF, another wholesome choice for choosy moms. The power of intelligent engineering is routinely put to the test at Oldsmobile. And here's the result. Of all the Cutlassieras ever sold in the last 10 years, we can say... 96% are still on the road. Safely say, Oldsmobile, the power of intelligent engineering. Leave it to me. A whole crowd of people. And who ends up wearing the mess? Wherever I go, if there's food, bullseye. It's like a magnet for stains. You get a lot of messy stains, you need a high-priced detergent, right? Wrong. A low-priced new dash with a stain-seeking system that gets in there and gets out some of the toughest stains. Because after all, life can be messy for anyone. Get new dash and clean a mess for less with less. The Black & Decker Dust Buster Cordless Vac. The easiest way to zip up little pickups. The Dust Buster Vac from Black & Decker put us to work for you. Prince and the Pulver will continue after these few messages. A week of great music and great movies continues with Funny Girl. No one believes you'd ever be a star. You don't look like the other girls. You've got skinny legs, you stick out. But she never believed anything else. Omar Sharif and Barbara Streisand. Hello, gorgeous. In the movie debut that earned her an Academy Award. Funny Girl, 8.05 Eastern, Thursday night on TBS. My mom got me this ornament from Homer because I started taking violin lessons this year. And she said I sound just like a whining puppy dog behind our garage. Mommy said I could keep them, only if I feed them worms. That's what my dad did on our fishing trip. If you want to keep your big ones, you go ahead and put them there. Four years old. Bring back your favorite memories each Christmas with unforgettable keepsake ornaments from Hallmark. Next only when we're four-five on it. See you at Hallmark. When you work in a doctor's office during cold season, you're going to get a cold. And I've got a butte. Hard to tell? That's because I took this. Advil Cold and Sinus. From the makers of Advil. It's tough on colds, like Advil is on pain. Gets you through congestion, fever, or bad sore throat. Believe me. I know. Advil Cold and Sinus. Advanced formula for the cold season. You, my friend, can use some fun. Big fun. Las Vegas, Atlantic City, cruise ships. But you got to take this along. The Player's Club Card. It's going to save you a lot of money. 25 to 50% off fabulous resort hotels, 25% off meals and drinks, up to 50% off shows and entertainment. Come on. Call Player's Club for much more information free. You're too smart to pay full price. New members get two free nights in Las Vegas or Atlantic City when the club books their flights. Call toll free now. Some Hallmark Christmas cards this year. This one's for my teacher, Mrs. Logel. And this one's for the two people who let me do everything my parents don't let me do. And this is for my special friend, Wendy Peters. Without her, I wouldn't be where I am today. If you're looking to send a special one-of-a-kind Christmas greeting this holiday, see you at Hallmark. This one's for my brother. I'm nice to him this time of year. Fortunately, the bathroom on the right has Northern Big Roll. And toilet paper. With 50% more sheets than regular Northern. Can someone please give me a roll of toilet paper? New Northern Big Roll. Alka-Seltzer's Laws of Indigestion. Law number five. The more sensitive your stomach is to pepperoni pizza, the more you will crave it. For a heartburn with headache, you need Alka-Seltzer because there's no law against fast relief. As usual, my brother found a way to get me in trouble. And by the time I got out, our bus was gone. And so was he. That's when I started running. Because no way was I going to let him beat me home. At AT&T, we know every great athlete has been inspired by someone. As a proud sponsor of the U.S. Olympic team, we salute them all. My brother. He still gets a kick out of seeing me run. Brent and the pauper will continue after these few messages. Jane, you ignorant slut! Live from New York, it's Saturday night! Right you are, Chevy. Every night can be Saturday night with this all-new home video collection packed with the funniest moments from each year of Saturday Night Live. A collection you can only get from Timeline Video. You'll see all those classic characters. Leave us alone! Whoa, whoa, whoa! I am Belgar. Well, it's not special. We are! Two-Wilid Printer Guys! Your collection starts with the 1975 season, starring the original Mount Rainey for Primetime players in their first year at the exceptionally low price of just $9.99. That's $10 off. Other videos will follow, one about every six weeks. Buy only the ones you want. So no matter who you are... I'm gonna be them. Or what you are... The killer bee! Call toll free now to get your first video for half price, just $9.99. The call is free. Hello! It's the Best of Saturday Night Live and it's time to laugh again with another ready for Primetime players. So call now! Your favorite! Call on everybody! To order call 1-800-626-7700 or send 999 plus 323 shipping and handling to Best of Saturday Night Live PO Box 1880, Department 1, Alexandria, Virginia. So, prior to the Friends and Family program, I thought that AT&T and MCI would be pretty close as far as what they were offering. But to hear that they're giving an additional MCI, giving an additional 20%, and that's when I felt that AT&T couldn't hold a candle to it then. I think it's really great to be able to offer an additional 20% on top of what we're already getting in the way of discounts already. There's no doubt in my mind that a lot more people will eventually go online with it. It can't be, it's great. The phases is cut out to let his belly button heal. For infants. Lindsay had awful messy leaks. This unique pocket back here helps hold them in. For crawlers. Now that Annie's learning to crawl, she needs diapers that won't droop. Phases fit better thanks to extra wide tapes and a stretchable system that helps stop gaps and leaks. And finally, walkers. These new diapers make walking easy for Chip. They're the only ones cut extra narrow between the legs. But they also help stop leaks better overall. Fampers Phases for newborns, infants, crawlers, and walkers. The first developmental diapers designed to help your baby grow up dry and happy every step of the way. It's just what my baby needs, just when he needs it. Cleaning shouldn't involve weightlifting. That's why there's the Dustbuster Corded Vac from Black & Decker. Perfect when you need an easy to handle vac and hard to clean spots. The attachments are a snap so it cleans every nook, cranny, and crevice. Lighten up with the Dustbuster Corded Vac from Black & Decker. Put us to work for you. This Christmas, get outstanding performance with the Tandy 2500SX20 Computer at Radio Shack. With 85-meg hard drive store volumes of information, the superfast 386SX microprocessor operates at 20 megahertz. With America Online, Prodigy, MS-DOS 5.0, Deskmate, and built-in modem. It's our most powerful PC for the home. Great for the office, too. Tandy quality and value for just $12.99. Radio Shack America's Technology Store. Brents and the pauper will continue after these few messages. A week of great music and great movies continues with... Sign here, madam. Your boy was born to play the cornet. A musical con man. Your son's little finger is perfectly situated to operate the spit bow on a B-flat floogle horn. A sell-out crowd. Along comes this fly-by-night salesman and you're all taking in. This is one song and dance you're gonna love. Robert Preston, Shirley Jones, and Ron Howard in The Music Man. This is Radio 5 Eastern, Friday night on PBS. Man, last week my cold was so bad. I was coughing, my head pounded, my nose ran. I'm sure I even had a fever. My cough medicine just couldn't handle that kind of cold. They had this in the infirmary, Vicks Formula 44M, M for multi-symptom. You know, it's better than the leading brand because it's complete cold care and a cough medicine. Pretty soon my body was telling me, hey, slacker, get back to work. That's some medicine. Vicks Formula 44, a better type of relief. Cleaning shouldn't involve weightlifting. That's why there's the Dust Buster Corded Vac from Black and Decker. Perfect when you need an easy-to-handle vac and hard-to-clean spots. The attachments are a snap, so it cleans every nook, cranny, and crevice. Lighten up with the Dust Buster Corded Vac from Black and Decker. Put us to work for you. This holiday season... Robin! There he is! Set your sights on the gift that's right on target. Kevin Costner is Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves, at an affordable low price wherever video is sold. This Christmas you can send a beautiful gift without ever having to leave home. FTD Seasons Greetings Bouquet. It's highly recommended by the one big guy who should know. It's as easy as FTD. Virginia, Oklahoma, top 20 collision at the 1991 Gator Bowl. Live Sunday night, December 29th, exclusively on TBS.