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So my wife says, honey, I've got to go shopping. You'll have to feed the boys.
Good thing we had some Chef Boyardee. It's 95% fat free and no preservatives.
So I say, Jack, you have got this together. Thank goodness for Chef Boyardee.
Today's Duracell battery lasts up to 30% longer than the one from a few years back.
Duracell. You can't top the copper tip.
Tonight's Peg's birthday, and Al's got something special planned.
You're taking me bowling on my birthday?
It's your birthday!
A romantic all-new married with children tonight.
Eddie Farrell was a small-time con artist.
Bob Marley likes your utility.
My name is Tucker Luff.
Until he stumbled into...
Hi, I'm off to India. Be gone for a few months.
...high society.
Yeah, well, this one right here. That is the address of the wine distributor.
Now he has a plan that could change his life.
See Dana Carvey in Opportunity Knot.
American-made. Good for the economy.
Rated PG-13. Starts Friday at a theater near you.
You ever run up against a tough sign that's cold?
As tough as it gets, Maximum Strength Dristan is tougher.
It will sweep away congestion, pressure, and pain.
And it will make you drowsy.
When you can't call in sick, call on Dristan.
This 1990 Dodge Shadow will sneak up on you in a not-so-subtle way.
But watch out. With $1,000 in guaranteed rebates,
it'll be gone before you know it.
1990 Dodge Daytonas boast an all-new cockpit
and guaranteed rebates up to $1,500.
We suggest you use the cash for flight school.
At Kentucky Fried Chicken...
We do chicken right.
All they have is all they need. Each other.
This is a decent home environment. It's just messy.
The Outsiders series premiere tonight.
This is the kind of food that some diet programs make you eat.
Little boxes for breakfast, little boxes for lunch,
and just when you're bored to death, another little box for dinner.
Forget it. Sure, you might lose weight on this stuff,
but you can't live on it forever, because no one I know
could stick with a diet like this. No one.
Get serious. Call Diet Center.
Call your local diet center today.
I figured he'd be a dweeb, so I asked when he'd accidentally bump into us.
Come on! You're crazy!
I wore slinky black, in case he wasn't a dweeb.
So Wendy goes... And you all have had... kind of all gate.
She hands me these Tampax tampons. She was right.
Boy, what a difference. I feel like great.
Then he turned out to be such a babe, that when Wendy showed up,
I pretended not to know her.
For the comfort, for the confidence, more women trust their bodies to Tampax.
It is estimated that more than 20 million people will come down with colds this year.
It's time for a powerful weapon.
More than 10 million work days will be lost.
It's time for a powerful weapon.
More than 20 million school days lost.
It's time for Benadryl Plus Cold Formula, with the strength of Benadryl,
plus a maximum strength nasal decongestant, plus a maximum strength fever and pain reliever.
Fight back with Benadryl Plus Cold Formula, a powerful weapon in the Cold War.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Did you hear the one about the four lumberjacks who fit in a Dodge Dakota pickup?
Or are we stretching our...
...Dodas S.E. Club Cab, now available in your neck of the woods.
Get up to $2,000 cash back on selected trucks guaranteed. Advantage Dodge.
Homer's never been known as a ladies man.
Hello, wayo!
But when Bart sneaks into a bachelor party, he'll give his dad a reputation.
Why you little...
Why you big...
I'm outta here.
You won't believe.
How does he do it, Smithers?
He's a love machine, sir.
And all-new Simpsons, next.
Oh, mama!
Diet programs that make you eat packaged food like this sound okay for a week or two,
but think about eating it for eight weeks.
Imagine how expensive it would get.
That's why I prefer Diet Center.
You can choose from great food like this and still lose weight fast, 20 pounds, 40 pounds or more.
Can you imagine staying on a diet program like this long enough to lose 40 pounds?
Get serious. Call Diet Center.
Call your local Diet Center today.
Everything the busy working woman of the 90s needs, together under one roof.
The Working Women's Expo, presented by K-Lite 96 FM.
They all come together for one night, Wednesday, March 28th, from 49 p.m.
at the Shiloh Motor Inn in Richland. Health and dental care, music, travel, insurance, fitness, diet, and personal transportation.
Absolutely everything the working woman can never seem to find enough time for.
Join K-Lite 96 FM for the Working Women's Expo.
Mark Twain takes a European vacation, and American enthusiasm is let loose on the continent.
The Innocents Abroad.
Monday afternoon at 1 on your Fox station.
The Innocents Abroad.