Get prepared for the most outrageous, controversial videotape in America, and be sure to stay tuned at the end of the program to find out how to get your very own 100% hardcore backyard wrestling merchandise. And there you have it. They got some hoes. Whoo! Whoo! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Look at that. Oh! Here we go! What's up? What's up? These guys are weird. Well, these guys are weird. Well, these are PWAs. Woo! Other man! Looks like it's time to kick some ass. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome. We got a shitload of matches. We got some quality violence. I'm gonna kick some ass. I'm gonna kick some ass. This isn't wrestling anymore. This is a pure fight. Bob said it once. I've said it 80 billion times. I'm back, motherfucker. I'm back. See, I'm a mortal, man. You don't kill me. Often imitated, but never duplicated. Melvin was the champion. This motherfucker. I was shot up in the fight. We have a great show planned for you. It's all about to get to the real fight. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. We're gonna get you. And that question is, are each and every one of you prepared for some knockdown, drag out, non-recurse, wall to wall, rock'em, sock'em, chair mashing, table mashing, big splitting, punch ripping, extreme hardcore kick ass wrestling. Let's hear it! Yeah! Oh! What are you looking at? Yeah! Oh! No more! Guys, they don't know wrestling like I do. So go ahead, camp man, tape me until the motherfuckers wife comes out, because all eyes are going to be on me anyway. Where's the bell? Oh! Oh! Oh! That had to be about the way. Wait a minute. Oh! Oh, he did a back. That's a bad hurricane clodice. Hurricane clodice. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Light it up. Light it for me. Mike's hardcore. Mike's hardcore. Oh! Oh shit! Oh man. Hurry up. Hurry up. Oh! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! Finish your ass. One, two, three. Oh God! Oh God! Oh! Oh! Oh! Yeah! Holy shit! One, two, three. Holy shit! Holy shit! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh damn! You got an asshole right in the butt. Goddy, coming into play now. Come on. Nothing for you. What if he's a right-handed attack? Oh! Oh! No! Fuck that dude off! Oh my Lord, he's going up! He's going up! What? What the hell? The referee? He's got the referee. Piss! Oh my God! Oh my God! TWA! TWA! TWA! Oh my, oh me, oh my. Not again! Oh my, he's going up! He is going up and then he's going down. What do you think of this? Exactly. Watch those fires. Stay on that thing. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Someone better call the meat wagon. He just expectorated. I got no fucking idea. Fuck him up! No, no, no, no! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! Scotty! 3-1 Scotty! Beat it! Beat it! TWA! Welcome to TWA, motherfucker! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! TWA! Oh, shit! Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck! Oh, shit! Oh! Hell yeah! What the fuck I'm talking about? Can't not keep me down in this motherfucker. It's what the fuck I'm talking about, motherfucker. OG, Hogan, D! Oh, shit! It's the funniest shit I've ever seen. Oh, what's this, huh? You got Quad Marrows bitches up in here? Come here, man. Talk about dogs. We're gonna do this shit doggy style, boy. Come on, Cordell. Beat his ass! Beat his ass, Cordell! These flowers are fitting for your throat. Come on, Nightmare! Go, Nightmare! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! He wracked himself. Get him! One, two, three! Oh, shit! Oh! Oh, God! Cordell, the Porter Piper! Oh, no! On the top! Oh, shit! Did anybody just fell through? Beat his ass! Oh, shit! It's the funniest shit I've ever seen. No! Flush his ass! Get him! Oh, shit! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, fuck! Oh, shit! Holy shit, poor monster. What's your theory on this mag? Tell me it's the devil! Who the hell is this guy? This is Geno! Geno, it's hardcore! Geno! No freaks, boy! Geno! Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, I almost got dropped by Geno. Oh, it's this. Oh, Pile Driver! Geno might have broken his neck. The thumbtacks are out. We know Geno doesn't like that. Oh, Geno. He's screaming his pants flat right here. Oh, he's over in the wood. Oh, he's spanking him. Oh, poor monster's busted open. He is slain profusely. Oh, he's out. Poor monster's trying to get his wits about him. Oh, my dad! Did Corn Monster tap out? I guess not. It's not over until Geno says it's over. Holy shit, Corn Monster. What's your theory on this match? Is this match over? Oh, no! He's going for the death match title. Chaos! Yeah, Chaos! Next coming to the ring, the death match champion, Carnage. Accompanied by his tag team partner, Pax, and together, the tag team champion of the world. This match is underway. He's up top. This trouble. Oh, fisherman suplex onto the barbed wire bricks. He's throwing a lot of stuff. He's throwing the barbed wire bricks. He's throwing... Chaos is waiting for him. He walked right into the light tube. Oh, no. He's taking them all out. He is in trouble. He is busted open. Because you're my friend. Oh, Japanese arm drag. Oh, no. On his head. I can't believe this. He caught him out of nowhere. Carnage is a bloody mess. That doesn't work. Oh, ow. I think Carnage is going to be feeling that in the morning. Oh, no. And I guess all there's left to do is burn someone. These guys have done so much to each other. He's sticking it in his head. Carnage is a bloody mess. How do these guys take this and keep going? They must want that death match title back. What? On his lower back there. They are in his back there. You can see that in the arm there. Holy shit! Holy shit! Oh! Both guys. Chaos bleeding from the head there. Both men a bloody mess. They keep on fighting. He relights it. He wants the fans to have it actually burning. Unlike some feds. Put that man out. I can't believe the death. Oh, shit! One, two, three. The winner is Carnage. He retains his death match title. They did that for the people. Oh, my God! Good God, Big Ben! I have not seen such greatness as this explosion of the Indian. What? What? What? What? What the fuck I'm talking about? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? You know you want them. Come and get them. Now available at backyardwrestling.com. The official backyard babes are busting out behind the scenes. And we've kept our cameras rolling on all the naughty non-stop action. This sizzling hot tape is available for a limited time only exclusively at backyardwrestling.com. Now is your chance to raid our secret archives of never-before-seen footage with the wildest, raunchiest, most gorgeous backyard babes in the world. We'll take you on a perverted joyride from the hot tub to the dressing room and everywhere in between. Don't wait another mind-blowing minute to get up close and personal with Tylene Buck and the backyard babes behind the scenes uncensored. Also now available at backyardwrestling.com, get all your hardcore gear and merchandise, including the official backyard wrestling t-shirt. There's a man who lives three blocks down. He lets us play in his backyard. We think his name is Jesus, but he prints it off Jesus and pans it out on a business card. Tread alongside someone, baby, someone to walk with me. Tread alongside someone I don't want to be. I'm not alone with you and me. Tread alongside someone, baby, someone to walk with me. Tread alongside someone I don't want to be. I'm not alone with you and me. Tread alongside someone, oh baby, come and walk with me. Tread alongside someone I don't want to be. Alone with me. There's no more, baby.