[theme song plays]
♪ Demons come from every side ♪
♪ In the darkness is the light ♪
♪ Out of the shadows of my life ♪
♪ In the darkness is the light ♪
♪ Surrender will win the fight ♪
♪ This girl's walked on fire and ice ♪
♪ But I come out ♪
♪ On the other side of paradise ♪
♪ Paradise ♪
[Jack] Fi was too little,
but I still remember the day we moved into our house in Colorado.
It was like walking into a castle. It was the best.
It was home.
I think that desire to have a home, a place that's all yours,
is what's behind all these online virtual worlds that are popping up.
You know, the ones where people can create their own real estate,
and even create their own characters, called avatars, to populate them.
There's one medieval fantasy world that has over 125,000 players.
It got so crowded that people were actually able to sell
the virtual real estate they'd created to new players.
It sounds crazy to me, but, uh, whatever floats your boat.
The only thing I'd worry about
is if people get so stuck in these virtual worlds
that they can't tell which world is real, and which one is just pixels.
[people chattering]
[Irene] Honey, do you think that we need a tea cozy?
We don't drink tea. How about one of these?
[laughs] Oh, yeah, one of those things that you look through
and they give you a headache... [laughs]
And well worth it for $300.
Whoa.
-[music playing on headphones] -[typing]
OK. On Fi's web page. Now what?
Uh, click on the mail icon.
You mean the, uh, the little envelope thing?
That's the one.
[Carey] Wow. Somebody has not been checking her e-mails.
Hey, guys, it's Fi calling from Aunt Rachel's.
-You want to say hi? -Mm.
Uh, Jack says hi, honey,
-and he misses you and loves you. -[siren blaring]
Sure, Mom. Grunt at him, too.
Hey, Fi. Have fun in New York.
She says hi, Carey.
So, did Aunt Rachel get the full partnership?
No, not yet. I'm giving her some pointers, though.
I mean, she's smart and everything,
but she still writes all of her briefs in longhand,
and when she wants to do research, get this,
she goes to the library!
Hello, 21st century calling.
Well, I hope you're not going into withdrawal without your laptop.
[Fi] I sort of am.
I just don't trust those x-ray machines at the airport.
They say they won't mess up your computer, but you never know.
Well, it's in good hands here.
-CanDew303. -That's Fi's friend, Candy.
-Oh, TulpaMaster? -[Jack] No, that's James.
Well, McQuinn's your grandparents.
The only one I don't recognize here is from a Jordan.
Jordan? I thought her name was Tamara.
Yeah, Tamara Jordan. It could be her last name, right?
Wow, you two must've had a very special five minutes together.
Come on, it was after a gig, the place was clearing out,
at least I got her first name.
This one's got to be it. Look, there's a smiley face right here.
She had a really great smile so that... And she promised she'd write. [chuckles]
Yeah.
[Carey] Darn, this one's addressed to Fi.
"Click here for a wonderful surprise!"
Fi won't mind if we check this out, will she?
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
-Carey, Carey, don't click on it. -What?
And you know how Ned loves antique stores...
[electrical buzzing]
-[Fi] Hello? -Fi? Are you there?
-What was that? -I don't know.
[Jack] That's how computer viruses spread, Carey.
Some loser sends an e-mail with an infected file attached,
and suddenly your hard drive is history.
[Carey] I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Fi is going to freak when she finds out you melted her laptop.
-Shh. I didn't know. -OK, baby.
Give Aunt Rachel a big hug for me. Bye-bye.
Excuse me, did I just hear
the words "Fi's laptop" and "meltdown" in the same sentence?
No... well, not those words exactly like that.
Is it broken?
I'll see what I can do with it, Mom, but I just... Carey, where's my CD player?
You guys, you promised Fi that you would be careful with her computer.
[Carey] Jack, um, why don't you just sit here and take my place,
and, um... See, Jack is a very, very smart guy.
If anybody is going to fix his, um...
Where's my mug? It was... it was right there.
Wait a second. Hold on.
That's the same kid that's on this other postcard.
That's the antique store outside.
[Carey] But I thought this Jordan kid was one of Fi's friends.
So... he works at the antique store?
I don't know. Let's go see. Maybe he can fix Fi's computer.
[Jack] I don't get it. This place was packed when we pulled up.
Hello?
Anybody? There's nobody here.
There's nobody out there either.
Maybe there was a civil defense siren.
Remember that tornado warning in Tulsa?
I didn't hear a siren.
Yeah, but why would Mom and Dad leave without us?
Well, see, they wouldn't. They've got to be around here somewhere.
This is just too bizarre.
Doesn't it feel like everybody in the world is just, like, hiding
and they're going to jump out and yell "surprise!"
-Maybe we should split up. -No. We need to stick together,
at least until we figure out what's going on.
There's got to be an explanation for this.
Yeah, but I don't think it's any of the explanations we've been thinking of.
[gasps]
This isn't possible. Where'd the rest of the world go?
Jack.
Uh, guys, I don't think we're in the world anymore.
Ned, lava lamps aren't antiques. They still make those.
But the old ones work better.
-They bloop more. -Bloop?
You know, bloop.
-They do. -OK.
We're back. Sorry we took so long.
Hello? Guys?
-Yo, Carey? -Molly? Jack?
They've got to be here somewhere.
OK, maybe it's a movie set or some kind of amusement park.
Right, yeah, and that thing with your arm? What would that be?
The, uh, give-you-a-heart-attack ride?
Hey, I don't see you coming up with an explanation.
Oh, you want an explanation? How about we have all gone nuts!
Maybe you've gone nuts--
Hey! Wait a minute, you guys. Just stop it, OK?
We can figure this out. We'll just... we'll retrace our steps.
Now, we pulled over, Irene and Ned went shopping.
Carey asked me to show him how to check for Tammy Faye's e-mail--
Tamara.
The only weird thing I remember is when the phone glitched.
It was really loud.
When you were talking to Fi? After we all said hi?
Yeah, right after that.
That's when Carey opened that e-mail from Jordan.
I already said I was sorry.
Wait a minute, how could opening an e-mail do all this?
Thank you.
Come on.
So what, we turn the laptop off and kill the virus?
[Jack] I don't know yet. I've got to look at it.
Laptop's gone.
Who is doing all this?
[Jack] Jordan.
"Welcome to my world." What does that mean?
Maybe it means that he built all this.
What, this is a virtual world? Carey, there's no way.
Come on, the kid sent that e-mail.
He's got to be some kind of computer genius.
You don't have to be a genius to send an e-mail!
Look, Carey, I admit something very weird is going on around here,
but everything still feels real.
Right. Maybe it only feels real to us because... because we're, like,
programmed to think that way.
I mean, come on, you saw what happened to Jack's arm out there.
It isn't just this world that's whacked out, it's us, too!
OK, so you're saying that one moment we were real,
and then that e-mail pulled us inside the computer?
-I said I was sorry about that. -No, I don't believe this!
[rumbling]
What just happened?
Uh, guys?
[water bubbling]
Guys!
[Carey] We're under water?
Guys...
-[Molly] It's coming in faster! -[Carey] Oh, no.
What happened, you guys?
-[Carey] The postcard, you hit it! -[Jack] I didn't do this!
I may have opened an e-mail, but at least I didn't drown us.
-Wait. What if we hit a different one? -What?
OK, OK, OK, maybe that one was me.
-The phone. -What?
I have the phone, and it was still working when you opened that e-mail.
-[Fi] Hello? -Fi? Fiona, is that you?
Didn't you just call me?
[Molly] Honey, listen to me, OK. This is not a joke.
The boys were playing with your computer--
Let me talk to her.
Fi, Carey opened an e-mail with some weird attached file, and, uh...
Well, uh, I think... uh... I think it sucked us into a virtual world.
Guys, April Fool's Day is in April.
[Jack] No, Fi, we don't know how it happened or why,
but you've got to help us.
Give me the phone.
Fi, listen, the e-mail was addressed to you.
It was sent from a kid named Jordan.
That's all it said, and the return address, was Jordan.
I enjoy a joke just as much as the next girl, but...
[electronic crackling]
Guys?
No, Fi...
Hello?
Guys?
What? Does she believe us?
So, we don't even know if Fi believes us.
-I know I wouldn't have. -Come on, it's Fi.
Her curiosity will get the best of her.
You guys, everyone's going to get curious
when they've figured out we've disappeared,
but what can anybody out there do for us?
You're right. We're going to have to find Jordan.
-Why? -Because he's the one that put us in here.
That means only he can get us out.
-Anything? -Nothing.
They said the cell phone's out of the calling area.
We've only been gone for half an hour. How far away could they be?
I don't get what good looking at these postcards is going to do us.
[Molly] Well, they're all we've got.
I mean, maybe they can help us figure out where Jordan is,
how we can contact him.
What, you think he's living in one of these places?
OK, you guys, I hit the underwater postcard...
and we were under water.
Mom hit the antique store, and brought that up.
Whoa. Think we could build, like, a virtual snowman?
Each of these cards is like some sort of enter key.
Yeah, like those touch screens you see on kiosks at the mall.
Oh, let me try.
Carey! What, are you trying to do? Fry us?
Sorry.
Oh, we're camping!
Well, Carey, you were right about one thing.
Whoever this Jordan kid is, he's definitely a genius.
What, you're trying to butter him up now? Oh, you think he's listening.
Hey, Jordan. I want to tell you something.
I think you're sick and you should see a therapist, like, right away!
No, better yet, an exorcist, because you're evil.
You hear me? Evil!
Wait a minute, no. I don't think this kid is evil.
I think he's lonely.
Jack, when you were little, we were on the road so much
that you and your sister
used to spend days building these little worlds with building blocks,
anything to get outside the hotel rooms, the bus...
Yeah, I remember that.
And your worlds weren't complete until you--
Until we filled them with people...
paper dolls, popsicle-stick figures...
Oh, so we're like little popsicle people in Jordan's computer world.
I don't see how that makes him any less lonely.
[modem connecting]
-It's from Fi. -How?
She must've modemed into her laptop.
It's like she's sending us an e-mail.
-What does she mean? -Wait, wait, there's more.
Inside the internet.
Inside the internet?
Wait. I'm no web-head or anything,
but e-mails don't just, like, write themselves.
I mean, somebody's got to send them.
Right?
[Molly] Who did that?
Don't look at me. You guys have all the cards.
[Jordan] Actually, I hold all the cards.
Come on.
Jordan?
Yeah, hi. How are you? Let's get down to business.
-Where is she? -Where's who?
She. She. Who have we been chatting to all day,
courtesy of Jordan's long distance service?
You mean Fi?
[bell ringing]
You let us call her?
Internet telephony.
You know, it's gonna put the phone companies out of business.
But all you can talk about is Jordan did this and Jordan did that!
I had to cut you off.
If you keep badmouthing me, she's not going to want to come here.
Wait. That e-mail was addressed to Fi. She's the one you wanted?
Months of preparation, developing my screen radiation capture process.
Sidebar to illustrate my genius.
Energy radiates from a computer screen
for a nanosecond before it pulls back.
I amp up the energy about a billion times,
and anyone in a 20-foot radius gets reeled back with it.
I go to all that trouble to capture my queen
-and I end up with you three! -Your queen?
Queen, girlfriend, squeeze, the terminology isn't important.
All right, she's in Manhattan. I've traced her that far.
But Aunt Rachel doesn't even have e-mail, the luddite.
She's a lawyer, for Pete's sakes. What's she thinking?
Fi went to a neighbor's to send you that last message,
and I don't want to spend six billion millivolts capturing a neighbor!
So, you call her,
and tell her to go to a computer terminal of my choice, and we'll be square.
Never.
[thunder rumbles]
Whoa.
Never? What do you mean, never?
You think you can say no to me?
I just did. I'm not going to give you my daughter.
Hey, lady, maybe you don't get it. You only exist because of me.
See this? Your computer code is in my hands.
If I degauss this, that's it. You're erased. You're history.
Whoa, back off, little man.
Listen, we are not bringing my sister into this place.
All right. OK. Plan B.
I use you as bait.
-Bait? -Sure, it's simple.
I send a new message, something cryptic but inviting,
"Click here for info on your missing family."
She's as good as mine.
But she already knows where we are. She's not going to do it.
Yeah, she's too smart for that.
Don't you think I know she's smart?
I've been in here for a year, monitoring websites,
to find the perfect person to share my kingdom.
Fi's got it all: brains, personality...
and she's hot.
Where did you get that picture? Have you been spying on us?
Spying? Who needs to spy?
Fi puts your whole existence on her website.
People, people, people, blah-blah-blah.
Living online beats anything the meat world has to offer.
I got games, I can live anywhere I want,
anytime I want. I don't have to pay for anything,
go to school, or even clean up my room.
-But you're alone. -Like people ever did me any good.
"Get a hobby, Jordan." "Don't be such a geek, Jordan."
"Don't spend so much time online, Jordan."
"We're worried you don't have any friends, Jordan."
You know, nobody out there appreciates me.
Why do you think I built this place?
You forgot about the popsicle people.
I could program a million people. I just want Fi.
Well, you're not getting her. Come on, you guys.
Wait!
We can make things work.
I'll make it nice for you here.
We'll be like one big family.
I mean, she probably wouldn't like it if you weren't here.
No.
You don't have to lose touch with people. I can find anybody from in here, look.
Like that girl you keep looking for, Tamara.
Oh, she was a Tammy Faye.
[Jordan] Or... or that girl you keep looking for, Rebecca.
Oh, yeah. Her too.
Jordan, writing people is fine, but it's not the same.
It's the touch. We could never survive here.
Fi could never survive here without being able to touch these people,
to be in their presence.
The touch is what makes life wonderful. It's what makes it possible.
If you get on that bus, that's it.
I'll erase you, and I'll get her anyway. Eventually, I'll get her.
You've been gone for a year?
What do your parents think happened?
They think I ran away.
And Mom's afraid something, you know, bad happened.
Have they given up hope?
No. Not yet.
That's what being a parent is like, Jordan.
You never give up hope.
[door shuts]
He built all these beautiful places...
but in every picture, he's alone.
Think he'll feel anything?
I don't know.
I love you guys.
-Where were you guys? -We were really worried.
What do you mean?
We've been here the whole time.
Yeah, I was checking my e-mail.
Uh, well, who's your friend?
Name's Jordan. Hi, how are you?
We've met, you guys wouldn't remember. I ended up erasing some files.
I just changed my mind about which ones.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've been thinking I should call my parents.
Oh, that reminds me.
I think this is yours.
Is he... is he a friend of yours?
I've never seen him before.
How did he get in here?