Let it rain, let it pour, let it rain a whole lot more boys.
I got them deep river blues.
Let the rain dry right on, let the waves sweep along,
cause I got them deep river blues.
My old gal's a good old pal, and she walks like a waterfowl,
if I get them deep river blues.
There ain't no one to cry for me, and the fish all go out on us free,
if I get them deep river blues.
Give me back my old boat, I'm gonna sail if she'll blow,
cause I got them deep river blues.
I'm going back to Muscle Shoals, time to get better there I'm told,
Lord I got them deep river blues.
If my boat sinks with me, I'll go down, don't you see boys,
I got them deep river blues.
Now I'm gonna say goodbye, and if I sink just let me die,
cause I got them deep river blues.
Let it rain, let it pour, let it rain a whole lot more, cause I got them deep river blues.
Yes folks, and here we are at the amazing Alarm Clock Rabbit.
For most people this is the first rabbit they experience in their lives.
Yes mate, and experiencing it coming down here is so good.
It is so good, whoa mate, and I think those guys are gonna be wet and wide awake now.
Oh mate, a cold splash in the face to start the day off.
Oh what a lovely way isn't it?
Oh mate, it's absolutely wonderful.
And who's this?
Mate, it's me and my crew.
It's me and your crew, and you're gonna show us the aim of the game.
Yes mate, fitting my boat between the rock in the middle of the river
and the rock big rock wall on the left hand side.
And mate, you got it right for a change.
Doing it with ease.
Oh mate, you are pretty easy aren't you?
Oh, not really.
What is this what you're talking about?
Oh, that's really easy.
Yeah, anyway.
You get that.
You do, and these high pressure jobs, it's Buddha.
Buddha.
And mate, I think these crews are gonna be, they booked a wake up call.
Did they really?
Yeah, for right about now.
At the Tully cabin.
That's it.
Nice and awake now mate.
There's no doubt about it.
Look at them smiling and waving and Buddha's awake.
The old alarm clock mate, guaranteed to wake you up.
Yes, ring ring, get up.
Who's this?
Stevie.
Yes mate, and just keep your eyes on the little girl up the back of the raft here.
She spots a march flying the person in front of her.
Those march fires are getting better mate.
Whack!
Oh, I copped that.
Did she get it?
I think she did.
I think she got it with her mouth didn't she?
Oh mate.
She swallowed it.
Yuck.
It's terrible.
Unbelievable.
Yes, konnichiwa.
Konnichiwa.
Sayonara.
Bye.
And there we go, see you later.
Who's this?
It's Shane and Shane's actually showing us a textbook run mate.
That's right, straight out of the guide's manual page, 56 paragraph B subsection C.
The way we like to see the alarm clock run.
That's right, it doesn't come any better than that.
That certainly doesn't mate.
And his crew's looking pretty happy.
And definitely not camera shot and he is, doodles two.
Doodles two.
They're the sequel.
Oh mate, the twins.
Yes, except he's uglier.
Really?
Yes.
Well sorry anyway.
Well you guys both look the same so you're both ugly.
Thank you very much.
Mate.
Oh mate, I'm full of compliments aren't I?
You certainly are.
Black fella.
Alright, and who's not coming over here?
Hey, hey, hey.
It's the wave.
Here it is, another black fella.
And look at these guys going for it.
Mate, they're not stopping for anything, just parrying.
Yo, making it look too easy again mate.
Oh mate, good stuff.
Check out those pink shorts will ya?
Oh lovely aren't they?
Trendiest shorts on the river of war today for the day.
Oh mate, they're so cool.
Check out those pink shorts will ya?
Oh mate, so bright, I need sunglasses I think.
Oh mate.
Who's this?
It's Drew.
Drew me?
Yeah, really.
It's, it's, it's, it's, yeah Drew.
Yes, he's all the way from Coffs Harbour who's a nimbo and a dude.
Oh mate, don't call him Trevor.
Yes, and just look at some of the face.
Whoa.
Put your tongue back in will ya?
Put that thing away.
And he's Speedy.
There he is Speedy mate and our largest river guide.
Our largest river guide mate.
He's actually about to turn his boat into the yellow submarine here.
Yes mate, just wave to the river.
Dave, Dave, Dave.
Woo.
Ferris Scoop, up.
And away they go.
Oh dude, get out of it.
Get out of the picture.
See ya.
They just went down.
Bye bye.
See ya.
Come on guys.
Get off that camera.
Go away.
Uh oh, trenched.
Someone pull the handbrake on.
Oh mate, I think we have to call these guys sponsored by Cotty's.
Yes, because they were.
Janned.
Arr, arr.
Yes, and who's this?
It's Big Bad Glenn.
No, he said today at the lunch spot that this is the best crew he's ever had.
Today.
Oh mate, he says that all the time.
He does, doesn't he?
He's a liar.
Yeah, Glenn is a crawler.
He's a greaser.
Yeah.
Oh mate, anyway.
With that nice new haircut and everything.
Look at Nick straining away at the back there mate.
Nick on his last day on the river.
Oh mate, looks like he's got the Qantas crew on.
Yeah, look at that wings out ready for take off.
And going down in the power of day.
Yes, crash landed by the looks of it.
Yay.
Just bodies everywhere.
And these guys have definitely spotted the cameraman.
Yes, what would they do if the cameraman wasn't there?
Any camera.
Oh, I don't know mate.
We would have a video.
Just keep your eyes on the guy up the back of this raft here.
Just keep your eyes on him.
Superman.
Yes.
Things in a single bound.
Yes.
He must be a bit of a punk slam dancer I think.
He's a bit of a rapper.
Oh mate, rap.
Just rap to be there.
He's rapping himself around the guys in front of him.
He certainly was mate.
Bit of a worry isn't it?
And there's the queer power station.
The major source of the Tully River pumping out a huge 72 megawatts.
Yes, up surging pumping white water.
A maximum white water.
And here comes the human megaphones.
It's got down.
Hold on you guys.
Whoa mate.
Get up and paddle.
Come on.
Did they hear him?
Oh, I think they might have done mate because they're paddling.
They are?
Oh, they are aren't they?
Oh, of course mate.
I was wondering what those earplugs were for.
Now no, they were Sean's crew.
Oh really mate?
Yes.
And who's this?
It's Steve mate.
Steve, yes.
And over that final big drop.
Look at that guy in the middle hanging on nice and tight.
Look at that ugly bloke give a thumbs up.
Oh mate.
Look at that.
They're coming out with a mat, do they?
Oh, I didn't think we allowed them on the river.
Jeez.
Oh, plastic surgery required there I think.
Yes, and mate there's a shot of the surging pumping white water of the Alarm Clock rapid.
Only to be spoiled by.
Mate, totally wrecked and ruined by.
It's general.
Oh mate, it looks like we've got a protest flag up the front there.
I don't want to go down this rapid.
Yes, get me out of this man's boat.
Please.
Back out because you're at the bottom already.
Oh mate.
And yo.
And he's still got it up.
He has?
He has.
Oh, he's put it back down.
He's decided to continue on down the raging rapids.
And what's happening here?
Oh no, it's Simon caught in one of life's most embarrassing moments mate.
Yes, oh, oh.
Oh.
Watch those slippery rocks.
Anyway, classic white water flow position there.
And here we are at the Doublest Waterfallos.
And for those two who don't speak Greek or Latin, a double waterfall.
That's right mate, the largest hydraulic on the river known to suck a raft back in.
Chew it up and spit it right back out.
Clean that microphone too will you?
Sorry about that mate.
Oh mate, it's nasty.
And here comes Simon mate.
And where's he going to go?
And loitering through here mate.
Through the gut run.
Oh mate, no worries whatsoever.
And here comes Dwayne and who greased Dwayne's boat this morning?
I did.
Well just watch what you've done to him mate.
You've not only have you got...
He chewed up, spat around and spat out again.
Well he didn't taste it.
Good to have spat him out.
It looks like the raft won the race there mate.
Yes, and look at the speed on that rescue.
Look at the agility.
Look at the way they just pull her back in, just lightning speed.
Oh no worries at all.
And Dwayne, they're giving him a bit of a hand.
Yes, come on, come on guys.
In a position fit for the camera here folks.
Look at that.
Look at the lovely smiles.
Yes, and here comes Robbie.
Robbie?
Yes, or one of the Robbie's anyway.
And making it look too easy mate.
Just slotting down the technical shift.
Oh no worries whatsoever.
What a guy.
And there's a shot of the 42nd Street parking lot.
And all better known as a 2 to 15.
Yes mate, because it can take you 2 minutes or 15 minutes.
And here comes that dark hero again.
Here comes one of the three amigos.
Yes mate, and he's been suntanning I think.
Oh no has he mate?
Yes, he's put that suntan lotion down it all.
Where is he?
Oh there he is.
And he's going to get trashed.
Whoa, holy dooly.
And tried to hit back the boat at the same time.
Yes, just see if there's any holes in the floor.
And here comes the man himself, the pig farmer from New Zealand.
It's farmer John.
Yes mate.
Just plowing through there.
Just.
Arr, arr, arr, arr.
Yeah.
Anyway.
You get that.
You do any tire pressure jobs.
Oh mate.
Yes, and who's this?
It's Fish and Tucker.
And mate this has got to be the luckiest run of the day.
Just.
Yes surfs up dudes.
Whoa.
Things suck back in there, is he going to make it out or not?
No, no.
Whoa.
He's going inside.
I've left a right of a right of a right.
Whoa.
Surfing now everybody.
Surfing now, come on and safari with me.
Dun dun.
They came out of it.
Dun dun.
Away they go.
See you later.
Bye bye.
Yes folks and here we are at the full stop drop.
Yes mate, Tully's version of the mighty.
Niagara.
Balls.
Oh that was swole down wasn't it?
It is, it's a big drop.
And there's one of our guys doing safety on the rocks.
Shane again.
You mean Shane was actually doing safety?
Well he was standing there anyway mate.
Oh just trying to look important.
That's what it was, that's what it was all about.
And here comes the old TJ himself.
And look at that guy, he's not taking any chances now.
Up the back there mate, he's really hanging on.
He's definitely not going to fall out now.
No way brother.
Here comes Jeffrey Poo.
Jeffrey Poo?
Yeah Jeffrey Poo.
Oh really?
Yeah.
Anyway.
It's Winnie's brother.
Yes mate, just trying to move the rock.
Look at that.
Just shove.
How many times have we told you oh Jeffrey you can't move the rock.
It's just too big and solid, just like me.
And what's this here?
I don't know mate, it looks like sunshine coming off a boat and some people.
Bit of a nice bit of camera work there mate.
It was Glenn filming not me.
And who is this, Sean or Steve?
No that's Steve.
It's Steve.
And there's that ugly dude again.
He can't get away from this camera.
Nice speedos mate.
He's always there.
Speedos?
Yeah mate.
Oh look out mate, you'll be sacked.
He's just been in the Surf Wivesaving Club.
Yes mate.
Mr Fitness.
Mr Bronze.
Who's this?
Who is it?
It looks like it's Geno.
Geno.
Oh mate, what's he doing?
Look at these guys, just cruising.
Just cruising.
Oh mate, look at that crew just galvanised into action there.
Oh mate, that clinging of paddles.
Oh the glint of plastic.
The gassing of aluminium.
And the feel of rubber on your skin.
I like that bit.
Oh mate, that gives me goose pimples.
Oh boy.
Yes, don't you just love it.
Come on Geno, get out of there.
And there's a far shot panning back to...
To Mooglie.
It is the way.
Our other trip leader of the day.
Also trying to move the rock there.
But they just won't listen will they?
They will not listen mate.
No matter how many times you tell them.
It won't move.
No wonder our buzzers are so mashed to bits.
Oh they're all just getting full of them.
Look at them shorts again mate.
Aren't they just trendy?
Oh they're just so bright.
Oh and who's this?
It's Solomon.
Yes and let's see.
Oh.
Oh Kimbo the bimbo.
Mate you just about blew it here.
Just about and I think I did.
Yes folks.
He says he's gone back in for a surf.
Yes mate and his wooooow.
Get back in there.
Flip, flip, flip.
Did he flip?
No, no he doesn't flip.
Oh rats.
He's just laughing.
What did you just say then mate?
I'm saying I'm having such a good time here.
I don't think you did.
I did so.
You don't look very happy.
I'm real, real happy.
I think he might have swore then.
No I wouldn't swear.
Not in front of the camera would you?
No way.
Oh man you're just getting mashed to bits here.
Oh well at least it didn't flip me.
I'm still the right way up.
That's the main part.
Don't you hate that?
You do.
You should have flipped.
It was that camera case.
It was just blocking me off.
That's what it was doing.
It just wouldn't let me get through those rocks.
Well I don't believe Laman.
And who's this?
It's Hiro.
Oh mate with a fine line.
Oh look at that.
Absolute dream run there.
Boat number one.
Missing the rock and everything.
And who's this?
It's Shane mate.
It is Shane.
Oh dear this looks a bit hairy.
Hair raising.
Oh it does.
Come on guys back to the boat.
Back to the boat.
Oh dear oh dear.
Oh they're giving a big forward paddle.
Going over the steepest part of the drop.
Whoa.
And see you later Shane.
Bye bye.
Yeah.
Yeah we hit the full stop drop.
Mate wasn't that spider a big one?
It certainly was.
That was huge.
Oh my god it was terrible.
It was so big and hairy.
It was ginormous.
Well it wasn't that big.
Yeah well.
Thought it was a big spider.
Yeah well.
That's what it was.
I saw a Rachnophobia last week.
I was just worried about that.
That was a scary movie wasn't it?
Anyway here we are back to the action at the Staircase Rapid.
Mate this is the longest rapid on the Tolley River.
Seven consecutive drops one after the other and the first one of those drops being called
Cowman Homesway Jesus.
And it's a humdinger.
Oh mate it is.
This one is 236.321 recurring meters of white water.
Oh mate.
That's just too long.
That's real long.
And I'm still making it even longer.
Look at this.
Oh mate.
Just hogging up heaps and heaps of camera Tommy.
What a waste of tape.
Well they're definitely not camera shy are they?
They're certainly not.
They're not doing much but smiling and waving.
Awesome Balkan biceps there just twisting that boat around.
Isn't he good?
Isn't he what mate?
Oh mate and down through those final waves he goes.
Oh just dodging out of the way of the rocks and here comes Buddha.
It's the Buddha man.
And look at this crew mate aren't they helping him out.
Oh mate guys just don't sit there like pork chops at a vegetarian wedding.
Get up and paddle.
Oh come on guys.
Do something.
Come on guys.
Look at poor old Buddha just.
Buddha's even got his paddle out of the water.
He's not doing much.
Not at all mate.
Oh and well oh they decided to give us a wave.
That's what's happening.
Anyway.
And through those huge standing waves down the bottom section of the staircase.
There they go.
Mate.
See you later Buddha.
Bye bye.
And come on get off there.
Get off there.
That's it and here comes Sean.
Yes folks and that.
And this is where Raging Thunder Spare, you the viewer, absolutely no expense in hiring
a helicopter to give you the view of this shot of the staircase.
Yes our fearless, brave and incredibly handsome cameraman is hanging by his toenails.
Fisky by him and mate stop.
Mate you said good looking cameraman but you were doing the video today.
Was I?
Yeah.
I was too.
Anyway mate that sounded enough like a helicopter.
Yeah well you were doing it.
You were just no good at them.
Well what am I good at?
I don't know.
You tell me.
Um Rhino calls.
Give us a Rhino call.
Hey Rhino come here.
Arr arr arr.
Alright you get that.
Oh that would be like that.
And they do.
They do.
And mate Nick's going to show his crew the ancient original rock carvings.
Hundreds and hundreds of years of ancient Australian heritage.
Oh mate giving them a good close look there.
And his favourite scene.
Is the mating scene.
Oh mate yes.
Oh mate and there's Speedy just um just watch this.
Oh dear.
Is there any water down there?
Oh no.
What are we going to do here?
And who is this guys?
I'm just going to pass you guys.
You're taking up too much time.
There's Wendy our little office girl.
Hello Wendy.
And she's with Drew.
And her friends.
How could they do that to poor Wendy?
She definitely threw it wrong this morning didn't she?
Arr arr.
And whoa around the left hand side.
We're following her today aren't we?
Around the left hand side of Castle Rock.
Why?
Because Boppaloo Balls go around the left side.
Left side.
That's it.
Nearly blew it.
Anyway doesn't matter.
Quick have a have a have a have a skull.
You get that.
You do.
Oh mate and here he comes.
There he is.
Farmer John.
Yes.
Mr. Intelligence.
Yes.
Well he has got an excuse you know.
What's that mate?
He's a Kiwi.
Oh of course.
He's a Kiwi.
Yes mate and um.
Come on farmer.
And sliding down through there mate.
Sliding down there is farmer Sloan.
Through the final waves he goes.
No worries whatsoever.
Mate what's a Kiwi standing on a corner with a sheep under each arm?
I don't know.
A pimp.
Arr.
And here we are.
It's big.
It's a good weekend.
Good fun.
Yeah well it was alright today wasn't it really.
It's the best rabbit on the river.
It's my favourite too actually.
It's got tree drops in it.
It's got rocks and it's got a rock wall and it's got water too.
It's got water as well and occasionally it's got boats.
Yeah sometimes.
Yeah over and then.
Oh yeah.
Around about this time of the day.
Oh yes which it would be.
Yeah peace brother peace love dove.
Yes Japanese hippies.
And look at the old nick mate with Jess.
Look at these guys.
Oh mate Jess.
No fear whatsoever.
Giving a reminder of the boys that they can still do it.
Look at that. Sweet as. Look mum, no hands.
Yeah. Not even holding on.
A crew full of Rambos and Rambets.
And it's Buddha man.
It is Buddha and look at him going.
Mate, do you realise this is actually the steepest rapid on the river?
Really, how steep is it?
It drops approximately 200,000 millimetres in one eighth of a kilometre.
Flat?
Certainly isn't.
That's a lot.
Yeah, certainly is mad. And here's Robbie, look at old Joe, cool himself in the glasses up the back there, mate.
Robbie the human blowfly.
Look at him, mate. No wonder he can see his way down the river.
He's got a thousand eyes.
A laser beam line down there.
Just straight down the middle. Laser beam?
That'd burn the raft, wouldn't it?
And here comes.
Speaking of burning rafts.
Speaking of cool dudes.
Here comes Diddles and his crew, mate.
It's you and your Japanese Kudu to Sapporo warriors.
Oh yes, mate. Everybody from Japan.
Yee-hoo.
They haven't told me to count to ten today in Japanese.
Go on, say it.
I've forgotten.
Go on.
Okay, no worries at all.
And you got to four.
Well, I can get to six.
Go on.
Who's this?
It's Shane.
Shane. What's Shane going to come up with, mate?
I don't know, mate, but he's going over the second drop. Looking pretty good.
Oh, mate. Everybody's just having wonderful lines down here today.
Look at them, and they look pretty happy too. Just smiling and waving.
And Shane just giving the international be happy sign there.
Yes, that's right.
Here comes Mr. Muscle.
Mr. Muscle, yes, mate. Our Arnold lookalike.
Yes, mate. This actually looks like the old lounge chair rafting here.
Yes, as one of the customers said the other day, do we have to pump him up too?
Is that right?
Yes, that's right.
Oh, that's funny.
Yes, and who's this?
Jeffrey.
The man all the way from the South Island of New Zealand.
Yes, mate. Another Kiwi there everywhere.
Oh, mate. Yes, mate.
But they manage to get here somehow.
They do. Most of them swim, I think.
Swim?
Yeah.
That's a long way to swim.
It certainly is.
Anyway.
Yo.
Here comes Steve.
And look at these guys going.
Oh, mate. Just powering into it.
Hang on there, kids.
Well, they don't have much of a chance at Steve's rafting, do they?
Alrighty. Looks exactly right, mate.
Yes.
Alrighty.
And who's this?
Who is it?
It sure looks like it's got a crew full of midgets.
Yeah, mate. The circus is in town.
Really?
Yeah.
We picked these guys up on the way down this morning.
Top?
Yeah, from the big top, mate.
You know, amazing things that Tully Water does.
Damn this thing.
These guys actually grew. You watch this.
Where? They sprouted legs.
Look, they sprouted legs and they grew.
Oh, mate. And here comes Geno.
What's Geno doing?
He's turned his raft around.
Oh, no.
Yes, mate. And just look at him.
Just...
Oh, such a strong lad.
Look at this guy go.
Of course, mate.
Because he just wanted to get on the camera.
He's an Innisfail guy. He's cool.
He's a whiphead.
Oh, mate. All those Innisfail guys are good lads.
Whipheads.
Where are you from, mate?
I'm from Mission Beach.
Oh, right. Yeah.
OK.
You know, Steve here going over the...
Speed bump.
And he's made lucky because the boys were sitting around the corner with that ticket.
The ticket and the... what do you call them?
Radar.
Water pistols. All right.
Water pistols.
Check this guy up the back, mate. He's hanging on.
He's got a vice grip on that rope.
I think the alarm clock really scared him, mate.
Oh, mate. He definitely woke up on that one.
No worries at all.
Yeah. So, peace. Love and harmony, brothers.
And here comes Hiro.
Yeah, mate. Look at that hippie up the front of his boat.
Check it out.
Oh, look at him.
Speaking of ugly, look at this thing.
Oh, mate.
It's the fish, man.
It is.
Not so scary sight, isn't it?
Oh, mate. The only man who gets whiplash from his hair.
Rope man.
Mr Dredd, the white version of Bob Marley.
Yes. Who needs a prusik when you got fish on the river?
I tell you what. Look at these guys.
They've got a little bit of flinstein rafting, mate.
Yes, mate. They've actually cut the bottom out of the raft
and they're just running along the rocks.
And Fred.
And there's Barney up the back there.
Yes.
Looks like he's half asleep.
Moogly.
Moogly, mate. And just look at him. He's a show-off.
Oh, mate. You know what he's practising?
Have you ever learnt that?
The girl guides.
The girl guides, mate.
Ten years of experience as a batting swaller.
Yes, he's even got his little blue uniform on.
Oh, isn't he just pretty?
Oh, he's so pretty enough that you should see him in his skirt.
Oh, you girl.
Yes, and here comes Farmer.
Farmer John himself.
And these guys actually look like they're members of the Sydney Philharmonic Orchestra.
No, mate. They were on the other day.
This is the bunch of rockers for ACDC.
Or Van Halen or Def Lepper.
That one arm band.
Arr, arr, arr, arr.
Oh, no.
Here comes... Oh, no. He's blowing it, mate.
Here comes Drew.
You can see it from here.
Oh, mate. He's going far too close to that 30-foot waterfall.
Yes, but don't go over Drew.
Oh, can't I?
Arr, arr, arr, arr, arr.
And there's a beautiful shot of the verdant green rainforest as it bends down
against the awesome waters and the languid pools of the Tully River.
Yes, and there it is.
Raging Thunder's hygiene scheme just before lunch.
Ponytail Falls.
Yeah.
Ooh.
Catch a ride to the end of the highway
And we'll meet by the big red tree
There's a place up ahead and I'm going
Come on to rise and win
They're going up around the bend
Here we are in the deep, dark depths of the jungle,
halfway down the Tully River here in far north Queensland.
What I'm going to do now is cruise around, have a tour to a few people,
and just see how the first half of their day's going.
How are you, mate?
Huh?
Your name?
Matsumoto.
From?
How long are you in Australia for?
How long?
How long are you visiting?
How long?
Six days.
Six days in Cairns.
Yeah.
Enjoy rafting?
Yes.
Very exciting?
Yes.
Exciting.
All right, thank you very much.
Good stuff.
Excuse me.
How are you?
Good.
Your name?
Kerry.
What's your name?
Tracy.
You sisters?
No.
Just friends?
Yeah.
You enjoying today?
Yeah.
All right.
How long have you been in Cairns for?
Nine weeks.
Well, there you go.
Fair enough.
We'll go have a tour to someone else.
Legal.
Hi, how are you?
Good.
Your name?
I'm out full of food.
Leanne.
Where are you from, Leanne?
Melbourne.
Really?
You should be back there watching the football.
Melbourne.
All right.
Anyone here a nurse?
Yeah.
Having a good time?
Great.
Yeah?
Who's your guide?
Dwayne.
Muggeley.
Dwayne.
On a scale of one to ten, what would you give Dwayne?
Probably a...
Six.
Oh, actually, he fell out of the boat.
He probably deserves a six.
What about his rafting skills?
He'd leave a nine.
Yeah, nine.
Nice bone, nice legs.
But a horrible guide, you get that.
Okay, we'll cruise over here a bit further.
Sorry, mate.
Hi.
Hello.
What?
Hello.
What's your name?
She's very quiet, isn't she?
What's your name?
Sonia.
From?
Melbourne.
And you're from?
UK.
All right, and you're enjoying today?
I am, yes. Thank you very much.
Would this be the second most exciting thing you've ever done?
I was going to say, yeah, I was going to say the first.
Oh, oh.
But the first?
You got a boyfriend?
Yeah, I have.
And rafting is the first most exciting thing you've ever done?
Well, don't tell him that.
All right, pick up your game, mate.
Hi, how are you?
Fine.
Your name?
Diane.
From?
Canada.
You enjoying the rafting today, Diane?
It's wonderful.
You're paddling very hard?
You bet.
Yeah.
Summie that for me in three words.
Summie that in three words?
Yes.
It's wonderful.
Hi, your name?
Suzanne.
From?
Sydney.
What do you do in Sydney for a living, Diane?
Suzanne.
I work in a bank.
A teller?
No, I'm not a teller.
Secretary?
No.
What do you do?
I work in the treasury.
Really?
Interesting work.
It's very interesting.
All right, very interesting.
It's mine.
Yeah.
I'm coming down like water
I won't know
Have you ever seen the rain
I won't know
Have you ever seen the rain
I'm coming down on a sunny day
Yesterday and days before
The sun is cold and rain is hot
I know
Been that way for all my time
Feel forever upon the coast
The waves are fast and slow
I know
It can't stop
I wonder
I won't know
Have you ever seen the rain
I won't know
Have you ever seen the rain
I'm coming down on a sunny day
Yeah
I won't know
Have you ever seen
It's back to the action.
Yes, mate, at the famous Corkscrew Rapids.
Where the boats go down.
And the lunches sometimes have been known to come back up.
Yes, mate, it's a long way, but they do come back up.
Oh, mate, and they make some wonderful colours too, don't they?
All the colours of the rainbow.
Oh, yeah, greens and yellows, everything in there.
Yes, mate, and he's moogly.
Yes, mate, doing a bit of Sinatra rafting.
Yes, mate, going with no rafters.
Sinatra rafting, not star tracking.
Oh, Sinatra rafting, see, he did it.
Sideways, sorry.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't, does it?
Who's this?
It's Farmer John.
Hey, what did that guy do to the camera then?
What did he do to the camera?
He's got a camera out.
I think so.
He's speedy.
Yeah, it is, mate, and look at him just flying through there.
Oh, mate, look at these guys go.
Everything he does is just so fast.
Just so synchronised.
Yes.
And hang on there, guys.
Everybody's hanging on to their two grips, good to see.
Yes, they are pretty dangerous, those things.
They'll knock your teeth out, they'll give you a black eye, and they'll break your nose.
And then you get turned around.
Arr, arr, arr, arr.
Right.
Yes, and that's how he demonstrates.
Yes.
Just like that.
Just sliding around there.
No worries.
The roadie.
And, mate, here comes Buddha.
Again, it's the Buddha man.
Oh, the power paddling team, look at these guys.
Oh, mate, these guys just galvanised into action here.
The pudding grant Kenny Deshaies.
Oh, mate.
Yeah.
The Coral Coast 4X Triathlon's on pretty soon.
Yes, and they're the top seven entrants.
And, yeah, we get that.
Oh, and here we are at...
The Cardston Weir.
Look at that swelling, sucking mess.
Oh, mate, isn't it nasty?
Oh, mate, you wouldn't want to go in there.
You certainly wouldn't.
That's why we go over here.
This is called the Chute, the Cardston Chute, very, very safe.
Sonia Tabb Falls.
Guides Revenge.
Guillotine Alley.
The playground.
The drowning simulator.
The, well, whatever.
The stunt area.
The stunt area, that'll do.
There you go.
Such a bully.
Oh, you big meanie.
And here comes Dwayne, and, mate, he's going to show us why we call it Guides Revenge.
Yes, mate, these guys obviously didn't paddle for Dwayne properly today,
and he just gets out the front and before they know it, they're out, out, out, and you.
Just push him out of that raft.
Isn't he a meanie?
He is a meanie.
And he's a Buddha man.
Really?
That is a Buddha man.
And what's the Buddha man going to do here, mate?
I don't know.
Coming out of the driving...
I just don't get rid of...
That'll do, the sinus clean.
Here's the man, the last day on the river.
Yes, and look how evil he is.
Just go on, guys, get out.
Evil, evil little man.
Pushes him out and then runs over them.
He does run over them, doesn't he?
And, mate, Speedy.
Speedy.
Oh, mate, Speedy the wheelie king.
The wheelie king, that's right.
Got him all up the back.
Let's see how high he can get it.
This guy actually used to be a member of the Hells Angels.
And I hear he was the biggest in the group.
He was, mate.
He's a big mean waste, though.
They'd be scary bunch, wouldn't it?
They certainly would, mate.
Looks like his stickers washed off his arms, though.
And speaking of scary...
Oh, yeah, speaking of real scary...
It's Farmer John.
Farmer John the Pig Farmer from all the way from New Zealand.
And, mate, I think he's going to attempt the side flip here.
Not the dreaded side flip, mate.
Yes, mate, come on, guys, lean over, but...
Blew it.
Oh, Farmer.
Oh, mate, we get all the celebrities here with raising thunder.
Yeah, you were the other day when we had Colonel Gaddafi.
And the Queen Mother, mate.
She was a rummage, must have been about 20 guys at the race wing.
Yeah, and that Gaddafi guy pushing everybody's face into the barbie.
Oh, that was funny.
It was good when he done it, too.
He actually looked better now, did he?
Thanks very much, mate.
Anyway, yeah.
There goes Sean.
Sean the Prawn.
Oh, yes, it looks like he's...
Look at that tangled mass of humanity.
Oh, mate, these look like free life people.
Oh, there's nothing in the brazier about this, I think.
Anyway, they made it.
Just a tangled mass of legs and arms and humanity there.
Everything pointing everywhere.
And here comes one of the three amigos.
Yes, mate.
Who's the other two?
Me and Jeff.
You and Jeff?
Yep.
Whoa, the three amigos, what a combination.
Alrighty.
It's one to the... yep, no worries at all.
Glenn, is it looking pretty cosy in there?
Looking real cosy, mate.
Look at that, arms around each other.
We could just about call that the love boat.
Gets him out of the boat as well.
Yes, matey.
And doesn't he look happy with that?
All over the place.
Yes, and here comes Trevor.
And what's old TJ gonna come up?
Oh, look, he's gonna be off his shoulder.
Look there, mate.
Oh, mate, the raunchy rafting look.
Oh, yeah, yummy.
And here comes the seven-year-old.
You've even got the rope out.
Oh, mate, got the rope out.
It's leaning back, guys.
And what a tailspin.
It should have went all the way over.
You've got to get him back further.
That was very exciting.
Very exciting.
Yeah, Shane.
And here comes the eight-year-old.
And he's getting up the front of the boat.
He comes from New South Wales, doesn't he?
Yeah, Coffs Harbour.
Coffs Harbour.
And here comes Steve.
With another tailstand attempt.
Beautiful, mate.
Two out of ten, mate.
Two out of ten.
No, I'd give it a one and a half.
Oh, okay, we'll call you Red Simons.
Red Simons, yeah.
And McQueen's.
McQueen's.
Oh, you're McQueen's.
Yes, not a sin to grin.
And I finish it up down here at the old cast and shoot, mate.
It's the fish, mate.
Yes, mate, giving his crew an utmost ride.
Oh, mate, Mr. Excitement.
Oh, mate.
Where does he get his ideas?
Unbelievable.
And that wraps up another day.
Goodbye from him.