Oh Oh I'm it the school is in desperate need of athletic equipment the girls need sports They want sports and besides it's good for I know what's good for the girl Yes in my day we kept our noses in books and didn't run around dress like fan dancers It's useless to argue Ben. This is cats be generous the nation would be used for salaries of the three European professors All right today joint offer. Oh that reminds me. We better stop preparing for their arrival I'm going across the street men for a sandwich now listen when the customers come in give them service I'll this your first day on the job. So show me that you've got what it takes Don't be afraid to push those sponges around use a little elbow grease Oh, it's the action. Oh, what's the idea mistaken identity? Hi a pal Okay boys you can trust us carry on Right with the force that is a pretty nice guy. I will grease their elbows and I'll grease her palms carry on Oh On the base strangers put in 10 gallons of gas I'm gonna cross the first sandwich. Okay boys super service carry on Right, right, right. I guess we might as well have lunch here. Yeah, right. Right, right Elbow grease It thank you super cómo Oh, please, please. Why, I never thought it would happen in my life. Hey, throw me that polish. Right. That's what you're caught for. What are you doing? Quiet, I'll be open to it. What are you doing? Call it. It's going on in my life. Who are you to call it? What's all the rumpus here? Take it easy, Field Marshal. Sit down. You don't know what you're doing. Go around there and help him. I'll finish this. Right. Hey, we got to clean the spa clubs. Get the tools. OK, finish this. Right. Right. Right. Right. Mommy. Come on, hurry up. Super savers. Right. Right. Wait. Don't you men know you're not supposed to open a body unless you starlight your hands? Hey, can you guys give me a little help? I need some repairs. We're pretty busy, pal. But we'll be glad to let you use the tools. Save us from working on the job. All right, men. A little super savers. You check the battery. You check the tires. What are you going to check? I'm going to check you guys. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right up there. Right up there. Right up there. Right up there! Right! Don't worry about nothing. That's nothing to worry about. Never talk a coin. What is this? Just as I thought. What? What are you doing? Take it easy now. Hey, hey, hey! What kind of a place is this? Let's go, let's go, Holly! Hey! What are you trying to do? I'm going to press his pants! Well, leave him alone and check the tires like I told you. Right! Don't do it anymore! Only one ahead of you. You're next. Right! Luca, here! OK, OK. Put that back. Hey, what's the matter with you? Oh, I just got this summer cleaned up. Shut it off! Larry, shut it off! Stop it, stop it! Stop it, stop it! Are you all right? Get up out of there. You see what you did, hat? Now I gotta clean those guys up again. Whoa! Don't stand around idle. You put in the water, you put in the gas. Get moving. Right, right. You see what you did, hat? Now I gotta clean those guys up again. Whoa! Right, right. Sorry, gents, but this can happen in the best of places. Have you all cleaned up the jet? Yeah, of course. Take it easy now, boys. It's all right. It's all right now. Now, hold still now. In just a minute, I'll have a towel right away. Stop that. Just take it easy, fellas. Hey, did you put the water in? You never do anything right. What happened? It's murder, it's all. Let's get out of here. Hey, Carly, come on. Hey, move, right. What's the matter? We're out of gas. Out of gas? What do you think this thing is, a camel? We've been going for over three hours. Let's get out of here. Hey, wait a minute. Didn't we forget something? I can't think of anything. How about Carly? Carly? He's in the car. Carly. Hey, Carly. Open the door. Hey, Carly. He's frozen. Get him out of there. Oh, a frozen baby, eh? He's as stiff as a plank. What are you going to do with him? We'll build a fire under him and throw him out. Come on, get him into the woods. Get your arm under here. OK. Up we go. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Hey, Carly. Can I get my arm out of this? Please? Leave that alone. Love when I feelibl Isa. Still lovelorn, impacted. Which is the way I am? OK, let's do it. All right, he's down. I can hear you. I can hear you now, kid. Whoa! I can hear you. I can hear you. I can hear you. I can hear you. Are you all right? I can hear you, kid. Come here. Give me your hand. Whoa! Now look at the mess you got us into. Wait a minute. What about those suitcases I put in that ice cream truck? There might be some dry clothes in them. That's a good idea. Let's go and look. You ought to beat your brains in. I think I will. Hey, yo. Stay away from me! I ain't going anywhere. They've stopped. Look! They must be our three professors. Yes, yes, indeed. Welcome to Mildew. I guess she means us. Let's go. Oh, Professor Von Stupor? Stupid? I guess you mean him. What, Miss? We have a grand day planned. First a visit to the classroom, then a reception and a buffet luncheon. I never ate a buffet, but I bet you got something there. Look out, let me get in there, will you? Oh, you'll just love it. Mildew has a lovely student body. Yours wouldn't be so bad either if you took off about 20 pounds. Come on, sister, let's go. Whoa! Thank you, girls. Henceforth, Mildew College will take its place among the world's greatest institutions of learning. No other school can boast of having such distinguished educators as Professor Feinstein, Frankfurter, and Von Stupor. Say, I'll meet you in the gymnasium next to the dumbbells. You'll know me, I got a hat. And now I'm going to call on Professor Feinstein to tell you something of his famous theory. Oh, me? Oh, that's Professor Feinstein. Any questions? Is it true that time and space are calculated by the number of interplanetary magnetisms to solar radiation? What do you think? I think we're going to have trouble with this, Dame. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to sit down. I'm going to test your mental co- sit down. I'm going to test your mental coordination with a little- sit down! With a little number called- Swing it, brother. Swing it. Swing it. Swing it. Swing it. I'll explain it so even you can understand. My colleagues will assist. Ready, sister? Get that junk out of here. Come on, boys. Swam. I'll give you the idea in a nutshell. B-A-B-E-B-I-B-E-B-I-B-O-VOTE! I'll give you the correct demonstration. Cutie Pie, Pound O's horse team. B-A-B-E-B-B-I-B-E-B-O-BO-B-I-BO-B-U-B-I-BO-BOO! C-A-C-A-C-E-C-C-I-C-E-C-I-C-O-SO-C-E-C-I-SO-C-U-SU-C-E-C-I-SO-SU! Get the idea, girls? Now we'll all join together on the letter D. D-A-J-D-E-D-T-I-D-I-D-O-DO-D-I-DO-D-U-DO-D-I-DO-DO! F-A-F-F-D-P-F-I-F-I-F-O-F-O-F-U-F-O-F-U-F-U! D-A-J-D-E-D-T-I-D-I-D-O-DO-D-I-DO-G-U-J-O-D-I-DO-J-OO! F J H E H I HIKI HAI H O HO HIKI HAI HO H U HO HIKI HAI HO HO J A J T E G J I TIKI JAI J O JO TIKI JAI JO J U JO TIKI JAI JO JO K A K K E T K I K I K I K I K O K I K I K O K U K U K I K I K O L A A L E L A I L E L O L O L E L U L O L E L E Z A D O O L A N E N E M E N I N I N O M O N I N U M I N I L A A L E Oh Duncan, mother said to announce luncheon is soon, it's ready. I'll do it at once, miss. Luncheon is served. Oh, super-sir! Enough, there's enough for every... Don't you know it's bad etiquette to reach in front of a person when said person is trying to snag a morsel of food? OOF Hands off around here or I'll get them down here! Help me, help me! I'll get you. OOF OOF I can't do anything with him, you try something. OOF Oh, wise guy, eh? OOF From now on you're on your own. That's gratitude for you. Do you think we'd better call a doctor? No, if he had announced of an issue, they'd swallow the thing. OOF Oh, Mrs. Ketsby? Yes? May I see you? Certainly. OOF There! Oh! Some terrible mistake. A mistake? I am Professor Von Stupor! I beg your pardon. Ready! Go! OOF A bullseye! This is the last straw! Tonight, we return to Hamburg on the clipper! I never heard of such a thing. You never heard of what? He's going to get a hand by going with a zipper. Hmm hmm. He will mix them a formula they will never forget. OOF Gentlemen, I demand an explanation. Oh, don't worry, lady. Let him go. What this college needs anyway is athletics, football. And basketball. I can do very nicely with a high ball. What do you mean? OOF Come on outside, lady. We'll demonstrate. Come on, Toots. Come on, girls. Any football, please, football. Any kind of athletics. Football is straight to the top. Right here, straight now. And just try and visualize, lady. A beautiful spring afternoon. The flowers are in bloom. The bees are making honey. And Seabiscuit is making six furlongs in one ten flat. OOF Quiet. The grant stands at filter capacity. And look. I see a diamond. Where? Where? Just old time prospectors. All right, break it up. Now, Mrs. Katz. Katz me. All right, Katz me. So much. Our suffering. Hey, will you quit heckling me? Come on, man. Break it up. Any luck? He gets all the breaks. Yeah, I thought it was a corona. A corona? It was a corona corona. But I only found half of it. No, no, no, no, no. OOF OOF Shall I put in a little of this? Just a little. About one quart. OOF You see, basketball is very difficult to explain without a basketball. Has anyone a basketball handy? No. Any kind will do. Pro flight, baby dimples. Oh, thank you. That's what I call super service. Come on, man. We'll demonstrate. Forward pass. OOF What's the meaning of that? Don't worry, mother. Swing it. Swing it. OOF Hey, what's the idea? See, you're the separator. Come on, let's get it. Run away, and your team's getting all the breaks. No, no, no, no, no. You go get it. OOF OOF OOF OOF OOF OOF OOF OOF OOF Mrs. Cashby's ball in her own five yard line. I've had just about enough of this, gentlemen. A fumble, a fumble. I've never been so humiliated in my life. But I'll forgive everything and give the school an athletic fun if you'll just get those three poor professors back. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Hey, fellas, get rid of that ball. The lady's got a proposition. Right. OOF Hey, lady, that's what I call super service. But you look out, sir. Oh, that's all right. We'll have them cleaned up in a minute. Carry on, men. Right. Right. Right. OOF Do you realize the man you love may be starved for a little old fashioned mothering or that what you eat may affect your mental health? And do you know what to do if your doctor makes a pass at you? You'll find fascinating information like this every month in Lady's Home Journal, the Journal of the American Woman. What's more, in every issue, you'll meet men and women whose names and faces are known to millions and get to know the private people behind those public personalities as they reveal what it took them to get where they are and what it's really like to be there. You'll look forward to the Journal for news, views, and advice you can trust on feeling fitter, eating better, looking younger, living longer, more entrancing fiction and stirring true life stories of love and courage, and for longtime favorites such as MediNews and Can This Marriage Be Saved? And you'll welcome every issue of the Journal for its expert guidance on beauty and fashion, medicine, and money, plus practical tips on making your meals more exciting, your home more inviting, your marriage more fun. But find out for yourself. Call now for a money-saving trial subscription to Lady's Home Journal. Get 10 months of the Journal for just $11.88, almost $5 off the basic subscription rate. Call 800-445-6000, toll free. 800-445-6000. Call today and you'll also get as a gift from the Journal this set of five handy cosmetic brushes nestled in a beautiful compact case with its own lighted mirror. Yes, it's free with your paid subscription to Lady's Home Journal. Call toll free, 1-800-445-6000. Get 10 issues of Lady's Home Journal for only $11.88. Save nearly $5 and get the cosmetic brush kit free with your paid subscription. So act now. Call 1-800-445-6000. That's 1-800-445-6000. To set up. What's it say? The girls. Ah! Ah! Animal! If you don't get back on the ball, I'm gonna end up with your job and I don't want it. You can't believe the things these people do. Buster, you be careful. Oh, my God! I don't care. Don't let anybody in. We're poking into a murder here. And the fact that it happened 30 years ago doesn't seem to make much difference. New Grant goes to press on January 5th, weeknights at 5, on TV 38. Happy Holidays from all of us at WSBK TV 38 Boston. Pardon me. Is the way to the house in? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yes? Yes? Yes, oh yes, yes. Shemp is not. Oh, Shemp is. Oh. Miss Jones, bring in the earthly report of my nephew, Mr. Shemp. Shemp, there seems to be some mix-up regarding your eligibility to enter these portals. But Uncle Mortimer, I... Is this what you want, sir? Thank you. Shemp! Bad Uncle Mortimer. I hope you brought your asbestos suit with you. Asbestos suit? Gosh, no, I wouldn't need it up here. I... No, no. Look, what did I do that was wrong? I wouldn't know, having died before you were born. But your report shows that you and your cousins, Moe and Larry, have been pretty bad boys. Oh, well, I'll be on my way. Get me a pitchfork and a red union suit and I'll go. Wait. I'll give you one chance. Go back to Earth and reform Moe and Larry, and you can come back here for good. Gee, thanks. I'll reform that Moe and Larry if it kills me. Hey, that doesn't make sense. I'm already dead. You realize that they will not be able to hear you or see you. They won't be able to hear me or see me? That's great. That's perfect. File this report, Miss Jones, until Mr. Shemp returns from his Earthly visit. Oh, by the way, my nephew, Mr. Shemp, my secretary, Miss Jones. How do you do? phys! Orroressarrr! Attention! The Heavily Express bound for the Big Dipper, the Little Dipper, 3rd, Mars, Venus, Cucamonga, Anaheim, all points south, leaving on cloud 49. Hoot! You'd better hurry or you'll miss your train. Now the depot is down this way, one block and one block to your right. Gee, thanks. Well, goodbye. Goodbye, she says. If I leave now, that proves I'm dead. Well, goodbye. Listen, you old rain cloud, why don't you look where you're going? I had the right of way. What's the idea? You think you're in California? Gee whiz. Whistle. Whistle. Cut it out, Uncle Mortimer. Wait for me. Et cetera, et cetera, and furthermore, whereas I shimp the stooge being of unsound mind, do hereby prove it by leaving all my whirly possessions to my cousins, Moe and Larry. Share and share a life. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Poor Shampy was such a sweet stinker. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! What is it? It's... Why is it? Why is it? This is all of poor Shamp's worldly goods. $140 to be divided equally between you. Poor Shampy left us all his money. Money! I lost that. The good thing you hit me with money or I'd resent that. Quiet! We gotta divide this dough up fair and square. Say, there seems to be some more in here. Wait a minute. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, oh, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Oh! Oh! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ah! Ah! Oh! Left that off. Hey. And the thing money goes, money goes. It goes, it goes, it goes. And the time in my mind, it's gone. Oh lord, it's gone. Oh lord, it's gone. Oh lord, it's gone. A hundred and forty smackers. That makes 70 bucks for you, Larry. One, two, three, four. Say, at what age did you graduate from grammar school? 18. 18, 19, 20, 21, 22. Robber. Say, tell me, how old do you have to be to collect your old age pension? 65. 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70. There we are. Hey. Your pile is bigger than mine. Here's where I start reforming you, mister. Why don't you watch what you're doing? What are you talking about? You know what we're talking about. Yeah, you blew the money right off the desk. Yeah. I'll divide it this time. That's better. I think you jipped me. You've been picking on that little guy long enough. It's about time you got a dose of your own medicine. Oh, a wise guy, huh? I didn't do nothing. Why, you up? Oh, no way. Well, may as you. Hey, that's enough of this nonsense. Pay me my fee. I've got a luncheon date. Oh, yes, your fee. How much is it? $150. Why, Shep only left us $140. I'll take it. Are you sure this is all you've got? That's the last red cent, Mr. Fleeceum. See? Ha ha ha ha ha. Any other lawyer would have taken the case for $20. Oh, is that so? That's what I call easy pickings. Are you telling me? Ha ha ha ha ha. Well, may see you later, chump. Don't stay in the office too long, you dirty crook. You might have reprimanded me. Dirty crook. Well, I did it with flat broke. Got a dime for cop air? What do you say? I had some air mail stamps. Well, what do you know? I know you're trying to jip me again. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, Moe, I wasn't trying to jip you. I thought I had a couple of... Moe. Yeah. You took my money, didn't you? Yeah, sure. My pocket was empty, wasn't it? Sure. Well, what's this? Hey, there's something funny going on around here. I got it. You know, Shemp said he was coming back to Earth to haunt us. Let him come. I ain't afraid of that fathead. Oh, oh. Moe, what'd you hit me for? I didn't touch you. That's what I was afraid of. Shemp's here. It's him. This ghost just hit me. Oh, I ain't afraid of ghosts. Stand aside. I'll prove it. Keep your hands in your pocket. Shemp, if you're around here, give me a smash on the chin and convince me. Oh, oh, oh. I'm convinced. And how I'm convinced. Well, I'm not. Shemp, if it's really you, do something else to prove it. Say, he ain't here. Well, things are looking up. I say, Lord Lattieington. Oh, there you are, Sir Moeington. Chitty-o-pip-pip and all that sort of rot. Old thing, old stuff, old fishmonger, old scum bait. You don't have to overdo it. Well, we're trying to be elegant, ain't we? Yeah, say, where's that butler of ours? Oh, Spiffingham. Chitty-o-sat. Yes, sir? Is everything in readiness? Yes, sir. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That's enough. Hey, you know, I'm worried. I hope this little scheme of ours works out. It is better after we spend all of Shemp's inheritance to rent this apartment, get these suits, and hire that butler. Well, we had to do something to impress the DePysters. After all, we're trying to sell them that phony fountain pen invention of yours for 50 grand, ain't we? And how? Say, why would anybody want a fountain pen that writes on the whipped cream? Well, a fellow can be on the desert where there ain't any water to write on the candy. Yeah, I never thought of that. I sure hope that the DePysters will be impressed with our butler. If you have a butler after I get through giving him the business. That's funny. I'm sure I heard that doorbell ring. Uh-oh. If someone's in here, how come I can't see? And if they're in here, then this hat and coats are for a walk by itself. Uncle Mortimer, let him hear this. OK. Hello. Who do I? Who am I going to do hiding? Oh, boy, I can hardly wait until we get our hands on that 50 grand. Here's to success with the DePysters. What's the big idea? You did it and you're asking me? Quiet. I didn't do it. Mo, it must be Shemp. He came back to warn us. Shemp, if you're in this room, give us a clue, will you? But no tricks. Oh, no? Ow! Ow! It's him. Shemp, where are you? Shemp! Gentlemen, does this hat and coat belong to either one of you? Oh, no. Those belong to our dear dead cousin. Did you say dead? Yes. And if he's dead, who gave me this hat and coat? His ghost. Says which? Oh, that must be the DePysters. Spiffingham, answer the door. No, so that might be that ghost. It can't be the ghost. He's right here in this room, maybe alongside of you. Oh. Feet, why don't you get going? Yes, get going and answer the door. I'm going, but my heart ain't in it. Hey, hurry up. We better clean up. Come in, folks. Why, you look as if you've seen a ghost. Mister, you don't know the half of it. Good evening. Good evening, gentlemen. See? I told you to get out of here. I told you to get out of here. Good evening, gentlemen. See? Plots. We shall return momentarily. Eh, what? Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Yes, I got rid of him. Now to see that the DePysters don't get shipped. Here is our invention. Well, I'm dying to be the first one to see a fountain pen right under whipped cream. Indeed, so am I. Now you take the fountain pen and place it in here. And put the paper in thusly. And pour the cream over all. Now turn the motor on to low. Low. It must turn slowly. Otherwise, it would overflow. Now would you care to make out your check for 50,000 now or later? Aye, aye. Oh! This is preposterous. What next? A towel. I'd like to have a towel. Oh! My! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, thank you all. You and your invention. Now you look. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, man. I'm blinded. I'm re... No! Oh, no! Oh! What if he's blind? Oh, Larry! That guy's dreaming again. Why don't you pray? Larry, he's been spoken and bed-a-can. Get the water and the axe. Put me out! Count for you to... Oh, Nickwick, you... Oh, oh, oh! Hey, you. What a mis-idiot. Oh, oh! Turn him around. Oh, turn him around. That's it. Oh! Oh! Oh, oh! Oh, oh! Get some more water. Oh, oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, hey, look out! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, oh! Oh! Oh, oh! Oh, oh! Oh! Oh, oh! Ah! Oh! Oh! Ah! Oh, ah! Oh. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! What a dream. You know, fellas, I just dreamt we invented a fountain pen that writes on the whipped cream. Hehehehehe. On the whipped cream. There's your whipped cream. And there's a fountain pen. Write yourself a letter. Yeah, ma. You notice that when you don't have hair, you feel a little more self-conscious. How did I feel when I was first losing my hair? I felt terrible. These people are not actors, but real people, and balding is a real problem. Now there may be an answer. Dr. Parola, medical doctor at the University of Helsinki, discovered an effective treatment for hair loss for both men and women. Proven to be safe, Dr. Parola says. It's very safe. It was about 80% success. The Helsinki formula, now available in the United States, is a simple yet effective shampoo and conditioner. Here's what people are saying about the Helsinki formula. Out of the 15 years I've been cutting hair, I haven't seen hair come back this way. This is a photograph of myself about five years ago. And you can see the hairline was almost straight across, just about even with the ears. Today, you can see a dramatic difference. A lot of hair all over the front of my head. This is only in four months, not over a five-year period, but in four months. All of this hair in this area is new. I actually have something on the front of my head. The Helsinki formula, I was very, very pleased with what I've gotten back so far. Hair has been coming in a lot more, and he used to have a hairline that receded quite far back, and we've watched it come forward. This is being proven. It may be for me less tried. And sure enough, it's worked for me. The Helsinki formula, researched and tested for six years at the University of Helsinki, is just $39.95 for a three-month supply. For a limited time only, we'll include a bottle of vitamins especially formulated for the hair. To order by Visa or MasterCard, call toll-free 1-800-543-3300 or send check or money order payable to Pantron 1, a PO Box 48806, Los Angeles, California. Include $2.00 postage and handling. If it doesn't work for you, the full purchase price will be refunded within 90 days. As a major newspaper said about the Helsinki formula, what have you got to lose that you haven't lost already? Call toll-free 1-800-543-3300. TV 38, a part of your holidays. We've always worked so hard, and now we can't even afford to keep warm. I mean, what do you say when your grandchild asks why it's so cold? I look at other people and, I don't know, sometimes I feel so helpless. If you need help keeping warm this winter, write to us at Citizens Energy. We'll try to get you the help you deserve. No one should be left out in the cold. Stop it, stop it! You're ruining the lawn! Don't tell me how to run my business. Beat it! That's not back where it belongs. What are you guys doing? Playing a game? Spare that paper! Clean that rubbish! Tilt that barge! Lift that bale! And swing it! Oops! Oops! Ow! At the coincidence, how'd you get under the paper? Ooh! What's the matter with you? The bumblebee bit me! Bumblebee nothing! Take this broom and sweep up! Yes, sir! We have met the enemy and they belong to us! Right, right! Ooh! Fly paper! Wait a minute, Moloch. Get your hoo off. Ow! Oh, look! A bird's nest! A bird's nest? That's my hair! Just because you're stuck up, you don't have to hit me! No, I don't. Oh, look! I struck oil! Struck oil? You're scrap happy. These oil bonds belong to a Mr. B.O. Davis. Here's his name and address and we're gonna return it. Oh, no, you're not! Yes, I am! No! Give me them! Oh! Look! Come on. Get up outta there, you! What are you doing? No, it shouldn't be a total loss. I'm taking a bet! A bet? Sweetney, a bet! Sure! How do you spell it? Ain't have a heart of it. Give me that towel. No! You heard me. Let me have it! Oh! Come here, you! Come here! Gentlemen, as a reward for your honesty, I'm going to give you a position. Oh, boy, a position! Huh? Hey, wait a minute. Do we have to wait? Not exactly. All I want you to do is find me a honest man with executive ability. If you find me an honest man and he qualifies, I'll give you a bonus of $5,000. Could we have some money on account? Yeah, on account of a broke. By certainly. Thanks. We're on our way to find an honest man. We'll bring him back as fast as we can. Excelsior! Have this refilled. I still don't see how this will help us find an honest man. It's simple, Sapp. An honest man will return the wallet. A dishonest man will keep it. Well, I hope so. We've tried everything else. The bait. I hope this wire holds. It will. Hey! He got our bait! A faker? That faker ain't no faker. He's a crook. The next crook that tries to steal this will wish he hadn't. Yeah, he'll get a hot foot in the pocket. And how? See? No smoking. I said no smoking. Remind me to have you stuffed. Now where do I get that battery? This will do the stunt. I'll press that wire up against there and blow him the kingdom come. Look out now. I'll face that crook. I guess we got him. This is disgusting. You're right. We haven't even come near an honest man. This wallet gag won't work. Nice pooch. The only honest man we found all day and it's a dog. Yeah, but he wouldn't make a good business executive, or would he? He's calling us. He wants us to follow him. Maybe you'll lead us to an honest man. Come on. How do you do? How do you do? How do you do? Hello. Is that your dog lady? Yes. Well, you should be proud of him, madam. He's the only honest man left in the whole world. Oh, no he isn't. My sweetheart is honest. Very honest. Yeah? Where is he? In jail. Get out. If he's so honest, what's he doing in jail? He was wrongfully accused of stealing, but he didn't do it. He's honest. Honest. He's honest. She might be right. Maybe all the honest men are in jail. If you can only help him to escape, I'm sure I can prove his innocence. We'll do it. What's his name? Palmeroy. Percy Palmeroy. Convict number 41144. Oh, you must help me. You must. Don't worry, madam. We'll get him out of jail if we have to go into jail to do it. Oh, how can I ever thank you? Don't try. Honesty has its own reward. We'll get our justice out. Here's where we go to jail. Then we'll find our honest man. Oh, boy. Oh, smart guy. Hey, wait. How do you like that? Well, at least I'll go to jail. Come on. Stay, come on. Get a cop. Get a cop. Come on. Pardon me. We're looking for a cop. Hey, you're a cop. It's a holer. Oh, so it's a jip. Nice work, boys. You've helped me capture public enemy number one. Jip the people. Come on, you. It's all your fault, man. You're going to the police. Yeah, you were supposed to hold him up. I did, but he stuck this gun in my ribs like that. Then he said to me, stick him up or I'll let you have it. Then he started to pull the trigger and I didn't know. Oh, a lighter. Maybe this is a lighter too. I didn't know. Oh, oh. Who are you, imbecile? Oh, look, the police station. That's the place to get pinched. Come on. Sergeant, we want to make a confession. Yeah, what did you do? Kill Cock Robin or start the San Francisco earthquake? Small stuff, Sergeant Ol' Sargey. We just held up the First National Bank and shot two guys. Oh, yeah? Hello. Yeah? What? First National Bank's being held up? Two guards just shot? Come on, fellas. Let's get going. Station house is the place to get pinched, huh? Hello. Look. Oh, look. Hmm? Oh. Mosquitos! That was a narrow escape. Yeah, I'm telling you officer, you'll get a year for this. Thanks. A year. Oh, I'll do that. Welcome. I'm going to be home with Danny. You go home with him. All right. All right, you guys, keep working. He's gone. Oh, a strike. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. Hey, you, second-cellinates, bring that horse and wagon in here. You guys get ready to load this rock in the wagon. Okay. Hey. We got to keep our eye open for 41144. Maybe it's the warden. Yeah, our warden, you. Get busy. Hey, great dame, what's the matter with you? A hornet's trying to horn in on me. Wait a minute, hold still. I see him. Thanks, Mom. You're welcome. Hey. You with that iron head of yours, now I might as well have to pay for another hammer. Yeah, yeah. Whoa, whoa. Come on, come on. Get a magnet. See that? Yeah. Thanks to God. All right, you three, come on over there. You got some painting to do. Come on. You can go back to your work. You men take these booklets and paint cell block number six. Okay. Hello. Yes, warden. Can I borrow your keys? Yes, of course. Go right ahead. Thanks. You're welcome. No trouble at all. Don't even mention it. He's a swell guy. We gotta find 41144. Yeah, wonder where he hangs out. They generally hang out on the gallows. Whoa. What's the idea? Why you out-jam this right now. It's him, Pomeroy. How did you know my name? We know your guile. Hey, we came to get you out. We got a job for you. Yeah, that's great. What do we break out? Here's the idea. Another thing. Wait a minute. Let's all go together. Go. Get those brushes and paint. Come on. Stop working. Boy, they sure look like guard uniforms now. You said it. They'll never know the difference. Come on. We'll paint our way out. Oh, pardon me. There's a white spot. Eddie, it's B.O. Davis. He's come to visit us. Hello, Mr. Davis. We found your honest man. Davis? This is Lone Wolf Louis, the biggest bond swindler in America. Suckers. Suckers, eh? Meet you at the rock pile. Another one. Another one. Hey, wait a minute. That's a real one. I'm no fool. That's north, south, east or west. We're the mash that is the best. Mass, weeknights at 7 and 11 here on TV 38. Hi, I'm Terry O'Reilly. On behalf of the entire Bruins family, I'd like to issue We're way out of line, at least for the next decade. NBC News Pentagon correspondent Fred Francis reports tonight on this significant new study. The report was delivered to Congress today. It's the most damaging analysis to date of the President's plan to start a space-based missile defense in this century. It is 422 pages of technical jargon, but its message is clear. It will be a decade or more before scientists know if the exotic Star Wars concepts can work. We looked at the size and the magnitude and the multiplicity of different kinds of problems that had to be addressed, some of them technological, some of them scientific, and said that if we really tried to do all that, how long would it take, and that seemed to be a reasonable estimate that we were all comfortable with. Specifically, the physicists said that significant gaps remain in what is known about weapons like laser beams and particle beams, the major portion of a defensive system. The scientists also said it would be a mistake to rush ahead with a first phase of space defense, which would shoot down some Soviet missiles with kinetic energy or collision weapons. The Pentagon, which had given the scientists complete access to top-secret files, took some comfort in what the report did not say. There was nothing in the report which says that we're completely out of our minds, something is beyond the laws of physics. But Dr. Marquet said the report was dated, based on information a year old. It is interesting that within the year that the folks actually completed the study and have been engaged in writing and reviewing this report, we've made significant progress in some of those key areas of uncertainty. He pointed out that some of the problems cited in the report on particle beam research and other experiments had recently been solved. But a few minor successes in research will not be enough to reduce the impact of the physicists' findings, the sum of which says neither President Reagan nor his successor will know enough about Star Wars to build it. Fred Francis, NBC News, the Pentagon. The superpower missile talks resumed today in Geneva, a crucial round that may determine whether President Reagan is able to achieve an arms control treaty with Moscow. There does appear to be substantial agreement on medium-range weapons. Both sides promised further proposals. NBC's Ann Garels has more on all of this tonight. Both sides expressed optimism as they got back down to business in Geneva. Soviet negotiator Abukov said he expects to see a treaty this year. We expect to have a treaty this year. But in Washington, the White House was more cautious, saying much of the Soviet position remains to be elaborated. The caution is over NATO concerns about Soviet superiority in shorter-range missiles. The Soviets responded to this last week in Moscow. They proposed scrapping them worldwide. Since then, Soviet leader Gorbachev appears to have changed his position, agreeing to eliminate these missiles only in Europe, leaving 80 mobile missile launchers in the Soviet Union. Secretary of State Shultz went to Capitol Hill today to report to Congress. There's a reasonably good prospect that a treaty will be negotiated with the Soviet Union. However, there are a good many hills yet to cross. America's allies in Europe are one obstacle. Speaking by satellite to European reporters, Shultz tried to reassure the NATO countries that Europe would not be left unprotected against Soviet conventional forces. There are many nuclear weapons left in Europe, not considering the ones under discussion. And Shultz made it clear he believes the total elimination of shorter-range missiles would be a victory for Europe, not a liability. We have to be careful, but we shouldn't be afraid to take yes for an answer to our own proposals. Even if the shorter-range missile issue can be cleared up to everyone's satisfaction, the negotiators must still tackle the tricky details of verification. And as one senior American official put it, everything ultimately depends on verification. Ann Garell, NBC News, the State Department. Japanese Prime Minister Nakasone was told by an advisory group today that Japan should restructure its economy, making it less dependent on exports, more open to foreign goods. That's pretty much the same message that Nakasone has been getting from Washington, and he is expected to bring that advice with him when he visits President Reagan next week. In this country, the government reported today that the economy, as measured by the gross national product, grew during this year's first quarter at the rate of 4.3 percent. That's the fastest growth in almost three years. But analysts also say that the biggest gain was in business inventories, and that is a sign of economic weakness. [♪upbeat music playing -♪- Help and make your American dream come true. We're the nationwide real estate company that can help make your American dream come true faster and easier. The new ERA! Dad? Oh, Julie. You've got your hay fever. Oh, she hasn't had a snickle all day. And I'm ready to dance all night. Thanks to research by Dow's subsidiary Merrell Dow Pharmaceuticals, millions like Julie may now find relief from allergies without the drowsiness often associated with allergy treatments. [♪singing-you can make a difference in what tomorrow brings. Save me a dance. Because Dow lets you do great things. Wow! Whatcha eatin', babe? Nuttin', honey. Oh, you can tell me. So what makes it taste so good? Nuttin', honey. Oh. Looks good, Travis. What is it? Nuttin', honey. When you've got the special taste of nuts and honey all wrapped up in a hearty crunch, what more can you say? Looks good, Sargent. What is it? Nuttin', honey. Who works at the electric company? How would you describe them? Tall, with long arms so we could reach things, and regular ears and a regular nose. The most important thing to know about your electric company is we're there when you need us. On special segment tonight, the network news, the first in a two-part series by NBC's John Hart on the profound changes taking place in television news, changes being brought about by business, competition, and technology. As John Hart reports, the networks are in turmoil, and not for the first time. Did he behead Katherine Howard? He did! You got 18 points! In the late 50s, the networks, NBC and CBS, lost their virtue. Their biggest quiz shows were rigged. Contestants given answers in advance. Their victories phony. $102,500. Congratulations! National outrage. Congressional hearings. Public contrition. At CBS, a whole documentary series was created. Its producer said to reclaim the network's virtue. The news divisions to the rescue. When the quiz scandal came along, they panicked to put on everything that we at CBS would give them, and everything that NBC would give them. News programs became America's family table where the country would gather in times of crisis. The president's murder. His assassin's death. Things the nation had a stake in. Civil rights. The conduct of war. The conduct of an ally. The conduct of leadership. I'm not a crook. The news program became the place the country got a shared view of the world. No other country has a larger proportion of its population at the same time, every day, getting a picture of the world. Ben Bagdikian, a former editor at the Washington Post. If you take that away, you take away a commonality of understanding, there will be a great loss. Take it away? Lose the news from the networks? What kind of talk is that? It's the talk of the industry. I think that if network news, the evening news I mean, does not fundamentally reexamine itself within two years, we are going to find by default that it will disappear as an entity. News 5 with Jerry Springer, Norma Rachid. Disappear to where? To the local stations is what the networks are afraid of. Stations that send their reporters to network turf. As WLWT Cincinnati sent Norma Rachid to the Mexico City earthquake. When you can touch the rubble and smell death in the air, it's heartbreaking. And Richard Hull to Beirut when the barracks were bombed. The increase in security is obvious. In Beirut we were covering Marines who were from this area and in Mexico City people from Cincinnati who were going to Mexico City to try to help remove the rubble. Jim Lyna, president of WLWT's parent company. In each case it was a local angle to a story, but we didn't try to tell the whole story. We relied on NBC to do that. Which is reassuring to NBC, but what's to keep the local reporters restricted to local angles? Mobile satellite stations can take them anywhere the networks can go. Okay, stations up next, story number 15, the State Department. And the man who sells the trucks has already hooked 50 stations together and pooling their own coverage, a pool called CONUS. The big stations will be able to join together with the small stations and produce their own local, national, international news at far greater profit. To themselves than they can experience by having a network newscast. But they can't handle things the way we can when it's a world class event. I mean to whom does Gorbachev or Reagan turn or the Pope when seeking an interview? Somebody from Des Moines, Iowa or Dallas, Texas or somebody who can reach the entire nation simultaneously. Somebody like Cable News Network maybe. CNN, the world's most important network. Not exactly what the NBC news president had in mind. CNN is important, but not because of its national audience, which is barely 7% of the network's combined news audience. CNN is a threat because it's cheap and famously cheap. Pinching pennies on news coverage, paying non-union salaries that are one half to one third the network's salaries. And no million dollar broadcasters. Each of the major networks spends up to $300 million a year to produce three to four hours of programming a day. CNN is on the air 24 hours a day with a $100 million budget. The amount NBC says its news division lost last year. Each of the networks has a new money conscious owner, Lawrence Tisch at CBS, Capital Cities at ABC, General Electric at NBC. And at a time when new competitors are cutting into network turf, new owners are bent on cutting costs, which is why network news people may be more afraid of their new bosses than they are of the competition. The money question in our next report. John Hart, NBC News, New York. ABC and 175 striking members of the Writers Guild of America today reached a tentative settlement to a 53-day old strike in which job security was a main issue. A ratification vote is scheduled for the Saturday. [♪techno music playing.♪ Where does it hurt? Here. For indigestion, heartburn and gas, nobody does as much as Mellox Plus. Dose for dose, it neutralizes more than any leading antacid and dissolves gas. Nobody does as much as Mellox Plus. When you think of one name that means everything in coffee makers. What's the one that comes to everyone's mind? Mr. Coffee. Because Mr. Coffee's been America's best-selling brand for over 12 years. You might select Mr. Coffee under the cabinet. Or Mr. Coffee Jr. Or the new international design series, the newest member of the Mr. Coffee family. Style. Quality. Dependability. And of course, all this from Mr. Coffee. Okay, cut! Beautiful, Miss Ray. Thanks. You know, I love making these polygons commercials. Mostly because I love the product. Super Strength Polygons really works. And you know, it makes me feel good to spread the word to denture wearers everywhere. Use polygons every day. It gets tough stains clean and keeps dentures pearly white. And that's for real. Try Super Strength Polygons Green. It gets even tough stains clean. And who knows better than the big mouth? I'm Rick Mears. Now during Pennzoil's Indy Winter sale. You can get 20 cents back on every quart of quality Pennzoil. Or $3 back on every case. Look for the rebate coupon and start saving today during Pennzoil's Indy Winter sale. The word from Moscow tonight is that Soviet dissident Anatoly Koryagin will soon be on his way to freedom in the West. Koryagin spent six years in labor camps for accusing the Kremlin of sending other dissidents to mental hospitals. He was released in February. He now has been given permission to emigrate to Switzerland. That's just one more sign of change in Mikhail Gorbachev's Moscow. Like the changing stand on arms control, for example. And that is the subject of John Chancellor's commentary tonight. Tom, let's begin with this idea. Mikhail Gorbachev wants to spend less on the military so he can spend more on the economy. A lot of Americans believe that's why he wants to make a deal on missiles in Europe. To take from the rich Soviet military sector and give to the poor Soviet civilian sector. But, as with many things in life, it's a little more complicated than that. For one thing, taking those missiles out of Europe won't save him a Kopeck. It will cost him money, in fact, to dismantle them. Besides, nuclear weapons aren't big ticket items. It's hard to get precise figures on what the Russians spend on their nukes. But in the United States, nuclear weapons take only about 15 cents out of every defense dollar. The big money in both countries is in the conventional weapons. Guns, tanks, planes, troops, and ammunition. Nuclear disarmament by itself won't solve Mr. Gorbachev's problem. His problem is bigger than that. The United States is spending about 6% of its gross national product on defense. The Soviet Union spends more than 15%. If Gorbachev wants to shift resources, he's got to cut things like armored divisions and a lot of them. Gorbachev needs a world of lowered tensions so he can persuade his military industrial complex to take a smaller share of the Soviet pie. One way to lower tensions is to have summit conferences. One way to have summit conferences is through nuclear disarmament. So the missiles in Europe are only the beginning of a lengthy process. Gorbachev talks about disarmament by the year 2000. If he's really going to change national priorities, it will take at least that long, which is commentary for this evening's time. Thanks, John. It took more than two weeks for U.S. officials to get the Bahamas to set free two Americans jailed as drug smugglers, Americans who were at the time working for the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration. Peter Anton and Al Mallard flew to Miami after they were finally released today, 16 days after their plane was forced down in the Bahamas by bad weather and they were arrested. The DEA told the Bahamians the two were on an undercover mission and fought to get them free, but it took 16 days. British doctors today are calling the latest test tube baby a major breakthrough. The baby's mother is calling it just overwhelming. Elizabeth Wright, who was born yesterday, was conceived outside her mother's womb more than three years ago. Her sister Amy was conceived at the same time in the same way. One fertilized egg was implanted into Mrs. Wright's womb and Amy was born in 1985. The other egg was frozen until the Wrights were ready for another child. By coincidence, Elizabeth was born on her father's birthday. Doctors in Pittsburgh this afternoon said that seven-year-old Ronnie DeSillers came through his third liver transplant with flying colors. Doctors said the problems that plagued his first two transplants, a virus and a defective donor liver, were not present this time. Ronnie received national attention last February when President Reagan heard about him and donated $1,000 to help pay for his first operation. And a young patient who may need a liver transplant has received a surprise gift from the passengers on board her LL flight to London. Four-year-old Moran Kadoche was on her way from Tel Aviv for treatment in England. The passengers on the plane learned of her illness and took up a collection to help her. They raised more than $70,000. MUSIC How fast does Anbosol relieve toothache pain? Before you can say... Anbosol. Gum irritation? Before you can say... Anbosol. Anbosol relieves minor mouth pain on contact for hours. Anbosol in gel or liquid. MUSIC Cadillac introduces Alante. MUSIC There's a new spirit. MUSIC There's a new excellence. MUSIC It's a proud sense of achievement. A new spirit in driving. A new Cadillac. Alante. The new spirit of Cadillac. Ralph's family's got money. Maggie's family's had it for generations. And Michelle, she's set for life. Having a credit union is like having family money. Credit union members can borrow from family funds at very low rates. And most credit unions provide loan insurance from CUNA Mutual. So when you need a loan, turn to family first. Your credit union. MUSIC We take care of our own. For post-natural brand flake Steve Allen on getting the best out of life. My best always comes out with a little humor. And sometimes with a sliced banana. Reach for the best tasting highest fiber brand flake. Post. Brand flakes are their best. How's this for a story? A woman skydiver collides with another parachutist before her chute opens. She's knocked out. She begins a free fall toward Earth in what appears to be certain death. But another skydiver sees her, tucks in his arms and legs, and dives toward her at speeds up to 200 miles an hour. They both live. How is that possible? NBC's George Lewis tonight in Phoenix with the story and the hero. Gregory Robertson can't understand why he's become an instant celebrity. He's been telling his story all day. On the phone, on tape, on live TV. This is overwhelming. I mean, this is nonstop. Robertson is an experienced skydiver with about 1,500 jumps to his credit. An engineer with AT&T, he spends his weekends advising other skydivers on safety techniques. Saturday morning he was with eight of the people in this group when they boarded this DC-4 to go jumping. At 13,500 feet they began bailing out of the plane. As they reached the 9,000 foot altitude, Robertson says he saw two of the other jumpers, a man and a woman, collide. They were both going in the same direction and all of a sudden she turned to 180 and crashed right into his backpack and skipped off looking like a rag doll. As the unconscious woman fell, Robertson went after her. He talked about how he tucked his arms in to reduce wind drag and gain speed as he raced to grab the woman before she plunged to her death. I just sort of become a little bullet heading straight at the ground. With less than 15 seconds to spare, Robertson caught up to her and grabbed the ripcord. He talks about his life-saving heroics rather nonchalantly. I just kind of flew over and grabbed it and pulled it. The woman, Debbie Williams, a 31-year-old schoolteacher, is recuperating in a hospital with internal injuries. The man she collided with, Guy Fitzwater, landed on his own but suffered a broken leg. Fitzwater's wife Shirley thinks Robertson is wonderful. I just talked to him and I said, you know what, you're my Superman. Robertson doesn't think of himself as Superman. He says it was all in a day's work. George Lewis, NBC News, Phoenix. Astounding. That's Nightly News for this Thursday night. I'm Tom Brokaw. I'll see you tomorrow night. K alleged, refusing to keep his truth. Tonight, witness the miracle of two great comedies. First, join the wild party at Cheers. Followed by the wild bunch on Nothing in Common. Then, share the success of L.A. Law. They do justice to television. I'll see you in court. Tonight. WBZ Radio's Dave Maynard is spreading the word about Boston's number one morning show while riding the famous racehorse Lightning. Lightning? Ride with a winner. WBZ Radio for news, accu-weather, sports, traffic, and everything you need for a good start. No, stop! Listen to Radio 10-30 with Maynard in the morning and get a real jump on the day. Count on us to help. Help! Maynard in the morning on WBZ Radio 10-30, especially on those days when you're dragging. Every night at 6, one of these fifth graders watches his hero, Dave Murray, on TV4's Eyewitness News. He's Dan Hamilton of Medfield, Massachusetts. Dan, who studies storms and sharks the way other kids study baseball cards, is the youngest member of Dave Murray's Weather Watchers. Does it matter which weather report you watch? Hi, everyone, I'm Dave Murray. In a place like New England, it matters every day. Between love and madness lies obsession, Calvin Klein's obsession. Ah, the feel of it. At Jordan Marsh. The Celts versus the Bulls let the playoff games begin details on night cast. Cocaine is a terrible, terrible drug. And so is alcohol, you know, when it's abused the way I do. It was making me drunk. I turn to drugs to try to make my life seem better. I turn to drugs to try to make my life seem a little happier than it was. Drug abuse has damaged and sometimes destroyed the lives of people we know from the silver screen. Tonight, they tell us the stories of their struggle. Across the world, they tell us the stories of their struggle. And we'll see how a brainchild video from a first grade class tied in competition with college level entries. All of that coming right up on Thursday's edition of Evening Magazine. From Entertainment Inc. in Wellesley, good evening. I'm Barry Nolan. And I'm Sarah Edwards. And our first story tonight is about entertainers involved in the drug world. And as a matter of fact, this week, the cover story People Magazine was about David Crosby, who was in Crosby, Stills, and Nash, who has finally won his long struggle with cocaine. Seems like hardly a week goes by without hearing a story like that. But, as we go through the story, we see David Crosby, Bill and Beck take a look at what it took for some stars to finally be able to say no to drugs. Dennis Hopper. I was hearing voices. I was hearing people being killed in the next room, friends of mine, recognizable voices. And there wasn't even another room, okay? You know, I mean, it was just, I was totally, totally on my mind. Clifton Davis. I wrote a will. And I knew I wanted to OD. And I thought maybe this would be it for me. I didn't know what was going to happen, but I didn't expect to live. Richard Dreyfus. I was tripping down the road to hell. These are just three of millions of Americans who have experienced the terror of drug abuse. For Richard Dreyfus, drugs led to being down and flipped out in Beverly Hills. The Oscar winner nearly lost his life when he rolled his car while loaded on drugs. But why did this talented actor risk his life and career in a narcotic haze? What I've decided is that it was mortal terror. It was fear of responsibility, fear of the career that I was being handed and mishandling, fear of adulthood, fear. Fear is just one reason for chemical escape. For 13 years, John Randall has operated a drug treatment clinic near Beverly Hills. He's treated scores of celebrities in the throes of addiction. A lot of people, even though they have fame and fortune, find it boring and look for some adventure, a way to alter their consciousness and turn to drugs. Take the person that works on this TV series. It's a terribly boring, long, boring day. You go to work at 6 in the morning, you work at 6, 8 o'clock at night. You come home, you're tired, you go to bed. They look for some kind of adventure relief from that. What has my drinking got to do with my knowledge about basketball? You can't drink it from these boys. One of show business's legendary drug abusers is Dennis Hopper. He was a movie star at 18, a cult hero at 32, a cocaine-fueled lunatic at 35. Dennis, at one time you were described by the film encyclopedia as the most freaked out person in films. Now, you've... Well, it's quite an honor. In Easy Rider, Hopper and co-stars Peter Fonda and Jack Nicholson played smugglers. Hopper admits that his own alcohol and drug abuse helped wreck his six-year marriage to socialite Brooke Hayward and his eight-day marriage to actress Michelle Phillips. Cocaine is a terrible, terrible drug. And so is alcohol, you know, when it's abused the way I did. I was an addictive personality. It's just wonderful to be free of it, not to want it, not to think about it. Dennis is approaching his fifth year of sobriety. Somebody hand me a straw now. I think this is ridiculous. Everybody running into the bathroom, I don't know, take a toot. I mean, how stupid. I mean, how many years I wasted my life. As lives are wasted by drugs, fortunes are destroyed. Just ask Nell Carter. I was a rich woman on paper, but everybody else had my money. I mean... Managers, agents... Oh, not managers, dealers. It was making me broke. How could a top television star nearly lose her fortune? I know that the cocaine users just spend 15, $20,000 a weekend. And the heroin users just spend up to $2,000 or $3,000 a day to support their habits. When Nell came to Hollywood from New York, she was high on the thrill of her first TV series. A few years before her, another Broadway star, Clifton Davis, had a similar feeling. And like Nell, Clifton found that Hollywood just wasn't enough. I turned to drugs to try to make my life seem a little happier than it was, or to at least bury the anxieties, the insecurities, the disappointments, the disillusionments. Clifton soon hit bottom, seemingly determined not only to destroy his life, but those he loved. Then he began a slow climb upwards. He became a minister, started a family, and resumed his acting career. As a father, Clifton prays that his children will avoid the perils of drugs. But as John Randall points out, the children of celebrities have a wide-open path to addiction. A lot of these young kids can buy their drugs with their credit cards, and they can write checks for drugs. Well, that's, you know, a lot of people can do that. Comedic co-stars Carol Burnett and Tim Conway have each been the parent of a drug-troubled teen. One of Carol's daughters and two of Tim's sons have been treated for drug problems. Yeah, the first one was tough because I didn't believe it, as all parents don't, and then finally by the time I got around to it a couple of months had even passed and I took him to a hospital. Tim and Carol are lucky. Their kids made it. Cloris Leachman wasn't as lucky. Her son Brian died of an overdose of prescription drugs. He was a child who always had to learn things the hard way. I mean, absolutely had to do it, had to do everything, and if one's good, ten's better. You know, he was absolutely a setup for the kind of, like the siren song of drugs, whatever that. Come over here, you know, we'll love you, we'll understand, we'll take care of you. Fortunately, there are some happy endings to the stories of drug abusers. Like many other celebrities, Liza Minnelli has experienced the healing process of the Betty Ford Center. After 15 years of addiction to prescription drugs, Liza was encouraged to check into the clinic by a graduate of the program, her friend Elizabeth Taylor. When she got out, I was starting to get really, feel really bad and sick and tired all the time. And she told me, I don't really remember this, but she told me that I had asked her a lot of questions. Well, what do they do? Well, what happens? You know, well, what goes on? Well, what do you talk about? What do you get? All of this stuff. And she knew. And she said, you were too curious. I knew that you couldn't have been feeling great or you wouldn't have asked all those questions. When you think of Hollywood, you think of people who have it all. But the sober truth is that for some, having it all is just not enough. I think perhaps the saddest victims of drug dependency are the kids. And next Monday night here on Evening Magazine, we bring you a special edition as we take a look at one of the most successful drug treatment centers in the country that specializes in adolescents and their families. It's called Straight, and it's working miracles. Coming up next on Evening Magazine, we take a look at Tom Warden and his New England Guide, so stay with us. Hot, hot. Hey, Willard Scott here, celebrating penguins are people today. In honor of penguins everywhere, your New England Ford dealer is offering free air conditioning. Penguins love air conditioning. On selected 1987 Ford Temple LXs with manual transmission. Ah, some folks have penguins or people today off, some don't. But don't worry, we'll save a tempo for you. And here's what's happening at your New England Ford dealer today. Thanks, Willard. Get 3.9% financing or up to $600 cash back. Hurry offer ends April 30th. Revlon nails just can't wait. So Revlon's invented instant nail color. Gorgeous color. In just one coat. My nails are done in half the time. You can change your nails. I thought that you can change your dress. Or your mood. Or your mind. So, who has time to wait for your nails to dry? Instant nail color, because Revlon nails just can't wait. The most unforgettable women in the world wear Revlon. Instant nail color, now at Roos. Hi there, I'm Tom Bergeron, and people are talking about kids. Join us this week for four very special shows that deal with issues that matter to young people. Each day, one of these finalists from our Kids Co-host Contest will join me as we broadcast live from Jordan Marsh. So join all us kids this week on People Are Talking at 12.30 on WBZ-TV for... For Kids' Sake! For some of life's battles you need an army. A salvation army. For victory over alcoholism and drug abuse. Over hunger and despair. For times of crisis. For times of joy. For security. For love. For more than a century. The Salvation Army. Going out for popcorn and a movie doesn't quite mean what it used to here in New England. Places like Entertainment, Inc. have made it possible for one person to run out, grab all the popcorn and the movie, and bring it back home for everybody else to enjoy. Well, we've sent Tom Warden out and his New England Guide to sample some great things that you might like to do this weekend. Everybody knows that the Boston area is home to some of our nation's finest institutions of higher learning. But what you might not know is that students from those same institutions this weekend will be raising their voices in song and in competition. I'm Tom Warden, we kick off our New England Guide tonight with a look at and a listen to the Intercollegiate Song Fest going on at the Faneuil Hall Marketplace. This weekend, the Jackson Jills of Tufts will be among 50 vocal groups participating in the Song Fest. Admission is free and it takes place Friday from 7 to 11 p.m., Saturday from 11 to 6 p.m., and Sunday from noon till 6 p.m. Now, Boston area colleges also play host to some of the countries and in fact the world's most innovative performers and that's exactly what's going to happen this weekend at Northeastern University as they play host to Dai Rikudokan, Japan's foremost butoh dance group. The Boston performances of The Five Rings are one of five stops on this group's tour of the U.S. Performances take place this Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m. and tickets are $12 and $14.50. Now in the past, many people have thought of quilts as little more than colorful, comfortable covers but the fact is quilts have more recently been elevated to works of art and very rightfully so as you'll find out if you pay a visit to the Quilters Connection Quilt Show going on this weekend in Arlington. Huge selection of beautiful quilts, everything from the more traditional to the wild and wacky contemporary. Taking place at the First Parish Unitarian Universalist Church, the show will also feature wall hangings, clothing, a boutique, and a raffle. It all takes place this Friday from 10 a.m. till 9 p.m. and Saturday from 10 a.m. till 4 p.m. Admission is $4. So for some fine Japanese culture this weekend, it's Northeastern University and Dai Rakuta Con or if you want to check out the Quilters Connection Quilt Show, that's happening in Arlington. And can the Faneuil Hall Marketplace be any more fun? Yes it can because this weekend the Intercollegiate Song Fest is happening right here. Whatever you do, go out and make it a great weekend. If you'd like to know more about any of Tom's suggestions for this weekend, call our information line, that number, 783-4636, just dial 783-INFO. Here's evening's Tammy Sanders with a story about a young man who will be spending most of his weekends doing what many thought would be impossible. A precocious baby, a very active little boy, Alan Myers had his whole life in front of him. But at five years of age, a tragic accident happened. I do remember running across the street after a ball and getting about halfway in the middle of the street or so and then noticing a car. Alan turned to run, slipped and fell on the street. The driver slammed on his brakes, skidding over Alan's left foot, causing irreparable damage. A day Alan's mother won't soon forget. Mom, don't look at it. Don't look at it. You know, he says that he wanted a band-aid for his arm. That's all he cared about was a band-aid for his arm, you know, a little scratch on his arm. It's been almost 14 years since Alan lost his foot. His story is not that unique until you consider the splash he's making today. Alan is a competitive diver for the University of Utah. In fact, he's ranked in the top six of the Western Athletic Conference. Diving is just such a complex, you know, motor skill sport and without having both feet to push off it and doing the dives that are demanded for a Division I program, you know, it just takes tremendous athletic ability which Alan has. The U of U's head diving coach, Greg Lascondro, gives Alan no extra attention than he gives his other divers. But he did help Alan get a special graphite prosthesis designed to help Alan excel in his diving. He really doesn't have the choice of making it hard on me or not. I'm the one that has to want to excel. And if I don't show the ability to excel, then I won't. One of Alan's biggest joys is as a swimming instructor, especially for this youngster. Kelly lost his leg to cancer over a year ago. Though the chemotherapy treatment zapped his strength, it didn't sap his enthusiasm. Alan became a great buddy and therapist. If I was to remember what I was like back then, I would have hoped that I'd been like him because he jokes about his handicap like I do now and have done for quite a while. Though he jokes about his handicap, his strong determination has made him an asset to both his family and teammates. Though the recognition is nice, it's Alan's positive outlook on life that makes him an inspiration to everybody. Alan's positive outlook and athletic ability also enabled him to try out for the junior high school football team and to earn a place on the squad. I was thinking like, holy cow. Coming up next, the remarkable story of Mrs. Preston's first grade class and how they put together a video that beat the big kids in a competition. You're right. The simpler I make my life, the happier I am. I went to the gym, came home and colored my hair. It was nice and easy. You thought it was my natural color? I can't believe you didn't know. Thanks. Bill says it feels great. I think it feels like silk. Gotta go. Bill's family's coming for dinner. Yeah, the whole family. How can I sound so relaxed? Nice and easy. That's my style. A 42-room estate on 153 acres with swimming pool and tennis courts worth somewhere in the neighborhood of $9 million. It's just one of the things you can buy if you win mass millions. A Porsche 944 with hand-assembled engine, tape deck and heated driver's seat. Approximate list price, $48,000. With a $50,000 second prize, it's just one of the things you can buy if you don't win mass millions. Ever since your post office invented ExpressMail Overnight Delivery, others have tried to copy our ego. But it's not so easy. Because ExpressMail has overnight reliability that's close to perfect, the most convenient locations and prices as low as $10.75. Most others charge you about twice that. So if you want a combination of low prices, convenience, and reliability, no one can imitate. Use the original ExpressMail service from your post office. Announcing Jordan Marsh's basement fur sale, a two-day liquidation of the surplus inventory of three leading department stores. Choose from a multimillion-dollar collection of fabulous furs, including many slashed below wholesale cost. Many one-of-a-kind designer furs. Every one a top-quality fur at a fraction of its original price. So hurry. You won't want the doors to close on this one. Saturday and Sunday only in Jordan Marsh's downtown Boston Fashion Basement. MUSIC As more and more people get home VCRs and video cameras, people are becoming more sophisticated about what they do with their home movies. Let's face it, it is just a little boring to just watch your kids standing in front of Disney World going... So now they have videos out to help you make better videos, like this one, How to Shoot Home Videos, the Basics, How to Light for Videography. Pay attention to these. You can probably become pretty good at it. But you'd have to go a ways to be as good as the folks we meet in this story by evening's Donna Hamilton. Just think how good these folks are going to be by the time they reach second grade. When Tyrannosaurus Rex speaks, everyone listens. By Mrs. Preston's class in 1986. There once was a dinosaur named Tyrannosaurus Rex. Wow! He was a terrible meat-eating dinosaur. It may not be the most technically polished videotape ever made, but it has earned Mrs. Preston's first grade class in Laurel, Maryland, plenty of national attention. When the tape was made last year, it was just supposed to be a fun way to study dinosaurs. But when they sent it to an international educational video festival, the tape won first prize for its age group, and then tied for best of show with a video made by some big-time college students at UCLA. When Mrs. Preston said, we are tied with the college, the college, Preston said, we are that good? I thought it was kind of funny from tying with college kids. Just imagine how they felt. Wow. I was thinking like, holy cow. All the teachers kept saying, congratulations, you won, it's so wonderful, and thank you. Aren't you excited? Oh, yeah, I finally got home and said, yay! One morning, Tyrannosaurus Rex woke up. Oh. And brushed his hundreds of teeth with sardine toothpaste. The 23 kids in the class wrote the story, did all the artwork and the camera work, they even made all the sound effects themselves. The project also helped to turn Mrs. Preston's first year as a full-fledged teacher into a video success story. You want to move his jaws a little bit so it looks like he's opening, closing his mouth a little bit? Yeah. Okay, go on. What's so unusual about their video is the use of animation. They did it the old-fashioned way by stopping the tape and moving the dinosaurs time after time after time after time. I really think they learned a lot about video making and working hard. I think they didn't think it would take so long. But did they learn more about dinosaurs or making a video? Dinosaurs. How big they were. Yeah. That was really interesting. At first I thought they were the size of us. After five hours, dinosaurs were badly damaged. And had to go to the hospital. Mrs. Preston says making the tape gave these first graders a wonderful feeling about themselves. Someone as young as they were could make grown-ups sit up and, like their star dinosaur, take notice. So when the dinosaur speaks, everyone listens. The end. Those young filmmakers are also shrewd enough to know that you're only as good as your last picture, so they're already at work on a sequel. To help us celebrate ten years of making videos right here on Evening Magazine, we are giving away some neat stuff as a way of saying thank you. Here's the details. We'll be giving away a trip for two aboard the luxury liner Windstar, cruising the Caribbean. And another lucky winner will get a fully equipped brand new Chevrolet van. Plus every night during the month of May, someone will win a Zenith personal TV. You must be at least 18 years of age to enter. Send us on a postcard your name, address, and daytime phone number. Send it to Evening's tent, post office box 400, Boston, Massachusetts, 02134. Entries must be received by May 1st. Drawings to be seen right here on Evening Magazine. But don't go away. We'll be back with more of Evening Magazine in just a moment. Redline lips never lie. That's true. Long lasting lipstick don't always stay true to your lips. The color changes. The Revlon's designed lipstick to stay true to your lips. Super Lustrous lipstick. The pink stay pink. The red stay red. The color you see is the color you get. It's magic. It's magnifique. It's Revlon. The most unforgettable women in the world wear Revlon. Super Lustrous Lipstick, now at Brooks. The Peugeot 505 Turbo. Nothing else feels like it. Until June 30th, 3.9% financing is available on all new 1987 Peugeots. This is how you pick the richest coffee in Colombia. This is how you pick the richest coffee in America. Look for the symbol of 100% Colombian coffee, handpicked by Juan Valdez. The richest coffee in the world. My grandmother came to America from Norway at the turn of the century. Now this Norwegian is going home to Greece. Barbara Rush, family and friends, went home to Greece in September. She said it was a dream vacation and shopping trip come true. My grandparents left Poland and Russia and came to Brooklyn. Now at last I'm going home to Greece. The Sadakas are jetting to the most beautifully affordable country in Europe. Greece and Olympic Airways will fly them there in style. This is your year to go home to Greece. Good evening. Tom Warden here with Lottery Live for April 23rd. And these wheels are obeying, even as we speak, the laws of Newtonian physics. As well as chance, we'll find out what the daily number is shortly for today's date. While we're waiting, no winners. A megabucks last night estimated jackpot. Saturday night, $6 million. And by the way, a week from tomorrow night, mass millions. The first drawing, you can buy your tickets now. Not to be confused with megabucks, which is going to continue on Wednesday and Saturday. Here's the daily number. 3-4-9-0-3-4-9-0. The daily number for today coming up on WBZ, The Cosby Show. And family ties and cheers and nothing in common. And then it's out to La La Land for L.A. Law. And we'll see you tomorrow with more Lottery Live. Well, going back to that last story, Barry, I wish a kid had recorded my family's trip to Spain a few years ago. My father had the video. But of course, all the tapes are like this. And you get seasick. My family's the same way. You'd think we'd be better at it. 90% of our home movies, Alex, my son, sitting on the floor in an off-camera voice going, Come on, Alex, sing the song, you know, hokey-bokey. And Alex just sitting there looking at us like, what are you? Yeah, he's got smarts. Well, we hope you join us tomorrow night. Tomorrow night, we visit Gold's Gym to meet the godfather of bodybuilding. I have a gym. And all my concentration is right into the gym. It is our feeling that sometimes you have to go out and work for your soul rather than your pocketbook. And we meet some doctors working miracles in third world countries. Those stories and more tomorrow night. Take care. MUSIC Hooray! What are you, Scott, at the Nonviolent Bullfighting Society's annual meeting where your New England Ford dealers have replaced the traditional bull with this front-wheel drive Taurus? And you saved $701. Get clear coat paint, premium sound, buy one for yourself and all the nonviolent bullfighters in your life. And here's what's happening at your New England Ford dealers today. Hooray! Ah, buen esti-est-a-ta! Now get 3.9% financing or $400 cash back. Hurry, offer ends April 30th. Play the game Monopoly at McDonald's. Hey, I don't have time to play games. Too bad, Tony, because with over $40 million in cash and prizes, you might have won a million dollars. Or a new Lincoln Town Car. Or a $250,000 dream home. Or a McDLT or Coca-Cola. Hold it! Hold it! Count me in and watch me win. Play Monopoly. Do not pass go-go directly to McDonald's. Win as the lear collect the right game pieces. Monopoly. My favorite game. At Volvo, we've been building cars for 60 years. And we've been safety testing them almost as long. Some car makers might say we've been obsessed with safety. Well, they'd be right. You see, we want to make sure our customers keep coming back. Hi, I'm Dave Murray. Clouds and 42 degrees at 8 o'clock in fog, drizzle and showers. The rule writes through tomorrow, but there's good news for the weekend. Weather systems are moving and that will bring the sun back Saturday and Sunday. It looks like a great weekend. We'll see you at 11 o'clock here on TV4. Sten Hoffman is the Marathon Man. Monday on TV4. Of the 143 new car models surveyed in 1985, Toyota Camry was rated the most trouble-free sold in America. So it's not surprising that Camry owners tell the most amazing stories of the unbelievable feeling of security they have driving their Camrys. Presenting the 87 Toyota Camry. More power. Handsome new styling. An amazing car gets even better. Who could ask for anything more? Think your cereal is nutritious? Put down your spoon and listen. Because a leading consumer magazine ranked 59 cold cereals on fiber, protein, sugar, sodium and fat. And of those 59 cereals, they found three varieties in the Bisco Shredded Wheat Top the Ratings. Providing plenty of fiber and protein, no sugar and very little sodium or fat. So before you pick up your spoon, pick up the leading cereal that topped the ratings. The Bisco Shredded Wheat. The troops are all snoring and everything downstairs is locked. Good. Cliff, all this planning for your parents 50th wedding anniversary has started me thinking we have to do something really special for our 25th anniversary. But dearie, we've been married 22 years. So? What about the 23rd anniversary? I mean you just don't want to whisk by that. No, I don't want to whisk by it. But you just went right to the 25th. I mean you had the 23rd in your rear view mirror. And the 23rd was sitting there on the curb with his head down and just saying, I don't know why she doesn't like me. Just because you can't divide me by five. I mean I'm an anniversary and I'm a good anniversary so don't be putting that 25 in my face. Alright, Cliff, I agree every anniversary is special. That's right. And I'll tell you something else. This 23rd anniversary is going to be the best one you've ever had. Is this so? Absolutely. Then I take it you have something planned. That is correct. Something special. That is correct. What is it? I wanted to tell you everything. Hello. Oh, I must have dozed off. Yes you did. What time is it? It's one minute past midnight. Tomorrow is today. And today is our anniversary. That's right. Happy 50th anniversary. 50th anniversary. Mmm. This is Jasmine. With a little nutmeg. Oh, Russell, you devil. Well, just because I brought you tea. You brought me Jasmine tea with nutmeg on our wedding night and you know it. Yes, I do. I remember that you brought it up to the room and you served it on a silver tray with one red rose. I was pretty romantic that night. Oh, yes you were. Maybe this time I get to finish the tea. Maybe not. What time is it dear? It's five after midnight. All right. I'm going to call my mother and father and wish them a happy 50th anniversary. Now it's a little late don't you think? Yeah, you're probably right. They've been sleeping a long time by now. Listen, I just made up my mind. I know exactly what we're going to do on the 23rd wedding anniversary. All right, Cliff. What is it? First of all, we get on the plane and we fly to Paris. Meeting us at the plane is a limousine and behind the limousine is a truck. The truck is empty. We drive into the middle where all of the shops happen to be and I give you my credit card. The truck follows you as you walk up and down the street going in and out of stores. When you finish with that card, you come back to me. I give you another card. Now, you've got a truck and a limousine. We then go to a private airport. I have a plane that is rented. The limousine and the truck get into this plane. We then fly to Italy. The truck, the plane and the limousine stay there while we just go to the Trevi Fountain, take our shoes off and walk around. And then we go back to the airport where a larger plane has the small plane, the limousine and the truck. If I don't need all that. You don't? All I need is you. On our 23rd wedding anniversary, all I need is you. And that trip to Paris. What do you think? Looks good. Thank you. Daddy, how come it's called a golden anniversary? It's called a golden anniversary because gold is a very rare and precious metal and to be married 50 years is rare and precious. I'm going to be married for 50 years too. Are you? And guess what else? What? I'm going to get married when I'm 23. When 23. And I'm going to have a house on a hill in Pennsylvania. That's a nice state. And I'm going to have two children. One will be a boy and one will be a girl. All right. And I'll have a dog named Tiffany. And I'll have a husband named Bud. Husband named Bud? Bud what? Bud Huxtable. Look who's here. Look who's here. I serve you. All right. And I serve you. How's school? Good. Where's Sandra and Alvin? Oh, they're having a discussion on where to park the car. You mean a fight? Yes. Dad, I took the bus up to Princeton so I could have a nice ride home with Sandra and Alvin, right? Big mistake. They fought the entire way. They fought over who was going to drive, which highway to take, where to stop for gas, when to stop for gas, who was going to pump the gas. You have to talk to them. I will. Where's mom? She's in the kitchen. I'm going to go say hi. Hey. Hi, Dad. How you doing, boy? Fine. Alvin. Hi, Dr. Hustle. How are you? How's school? Fine, thank you, sir. How was the trip? Nice. Nice. Really? Oh, yes, it was wonderful. It was a lot of fun. It was excellent, really. Probably the best trip I've ever had. How can you say that, Alvin? Dad, you might as well know it was a miserable trip. We fought all the way home. Yes, okay. See, we decided that since we were coming to see my family, I would pay for the gas. But then when we stopped to get the gas, he wouldn't let me pump it. Dr. Huxtable, that is a man's job. Alvin, there is no such thing as a man's job. Why couldn't I pump the gas? It wouldn't look right. I see. You won't let me pump gas, but you'll ask me to make you a sandwich or get you a cup of coffee. That's different. How? Pumping gas makes your hands dirty and smelly. Women should not smell like gasoline. Women should smell like sandwiches. Alvin, that's ridiculous. No, it isn't. Yes, it is. No, it isn't. Yes, it is. Can I suggest something? Sure, dad. Why don't the two of you just get away from each other for about an hour and give yourselves time to think about your relationship and the problems that you're having and why you're bringing them here. All right. I'll just go upstairs and unpack. Have a good time, friends. Alvin? Yes? Alvin? Yes? Ah. I know, sir. I get on Sandra's nerves. Alvin, you get on her nerves, you get in her nerves, you get around her nerves. It's just that I don't know who I am anymore. Alvin. I know, sir, but I'm confused about my duties as a man. Your duties? Yes, sir. What I'm supposed to do and what I'm not supposed to do. If I offer to take Sandra's luggage, she says, just because I'm a woman doesn't mean I can't do this myself. But then, if I don't open a door for her, she gets angry and calls me inconsiderate. Please, Dr. Hux will tell me, what is my job? Your job is to get out. Sir? No, no, I don't mean for you to leave the house. Oh, thank you. What I'm saying is, the luggage is there. You go to pick it up. Alvin, I can handle that myself. It's time for you to go to the door. You go to the door to open it. She says, Alvin, I can do it myself. You got it? Dad? Yes, dear. Oh, hi, Alvin. Hi, Vanessa. Dad, mom has a jar that won't open and she needs some help. I'll do it. Well, thanks. Alvin? Hello, Mrs. Huxtable. Hi, Alvin. I understand you're having some trouble with the jar. Oh, yes, I am. Allow me? It's like cement. That's no problem. This is one job I'm not confused about. What do you mean? This is a man's job. What's a man's job? Opening a jar when a woman can't do it. Really? I didn't know that. My hands must be a little slippery. Thank you. Having trouble, Alvin? I'm not done yet. You know, Alvin, if opening a jar is a man's job and you can't do it... Hey, mom. Hi. Alvin, what are you doing? I'm opening a jar for your mom. He's been opening it for about five minutes. Well, let me try. No, Sandra, I can do it. No, come on, Alvin. Sandra, I think I'm perfectly capable. There you go, mom. Thanks, Sandra. You're a real man. One half pound of beef. Flame broiled. The double beef whopper. The one that does the job. The double beef whopper. Burger King. The best food for fast times. This is the anatomy of a whole new animal. It has a heavier backbone. Powerful muscles. Quick reflexes. And one tough hide. Chevy's Liner Meager 1988 full-size pickup. It's a whole new animal. The heartbeat of America. That's the day Chevy truck. Making everyday kitchen chores go smoothly is no short order. But with the handy mixer cordless beater from Black & Decker, you can beat, mix, stir, and blend quickly and easily. And be sure that everything will come out perfectly. Black & Decker, ideas at work. Dinner. Well, we can have a chef's salad with a creamy Italian dressing. You can make most anything on your mind with good seasons. From mayo and sour cream to good season's Italian. Good season salad dressing makes the ideas keep pouring out. Rosso, you ready? What do you think? Well, you certainly took your time, but it was worth it. How can that be? Alan, Jack, come in. What a nice surprise. Surprise? And all the time we've lived across the street from you, have we ever forgotten your anniversary? You better say never. Never. Here you are. Thank you. Here's in her pajamas. Now you've gone totally. Oh, what's the difference? They're going to find out anyway. Oh, don't worry. We'll act surprised when we open it. I've passed a lot of milestones with this beautiful lady. But this is a big one. 50 years of married life. 50 years is nothing. You're babies. When you've been married as long as Alan and I, then you know you spent some time together. How many years for you two? 55 years. And the last five have been the best. That's because I spent the first 50 breaking him in. You two look like you're going out. No, this is how we always dress around the house. We're going over to our son's house. He and the family are having a special celebration for us. The 50th anniversary should be special. We had one I'll never forget. What did you do? Jack took me back to the very spot he proposed to me and asked me to marry him all over again. Oh, that's lovely. It was back in Arizona and he'd taken me out to the desert with the sunset turning the sand all rose and two little palm trees to bear witness. I carried that beautiful memory with me for 50 years and I couldn't wait to get back. Wasn't it as beautiful as you remembered? Well, not exactly. Our little corner of the desert is now a shopping mall. But the two palm trees were there though, right in front of a pizza parlor. I didn't let that stop me. I took Ellen right up to the steps of the pizza parlor and got down on one knee. I said, will you marry me again? It was a different memory and we had different witnesses, but it was beautiful. We'll go back again after the next 50. It's a date. And if you do take that trip again, we'll join you. If you don't mind a couple of babies tagging along. Just relax. They'll be here in any minute. Well, that's that. How's it going, Elvin? Rudy and I just finished making the salad. Ah, good. I just want both of you to know that Sandra and I have made a vow not to fight tonight. We discussed things and I promised that I'd try to be more sensitive to the way she feels. I'm happy for you. All set. I'll go in the kitchen and help out. Wait a minute, Sandra. What, Elvin? You look stunning. Thank you. I don't know where you got that dress, but it really accentuates your beauty. I mean it. I've never seen you look so radiant. Elvin? Yes? This is the fourth time you've seen me in this dress. It is? Yes. Obviously the first three times meant nothing to you. That's not true. They meant a lot to me. I just don't remember them. Elvin? I know, sir. I didn't go. No, no, no. Elvin, you never, never say you didn't remember. Never? Okay. How long do you think that relationship will last? Forever. Who is it? It's your mother. No, it's some old people out there married fifty years. Happy anniversary. Happy anniversary. Happy anniversary to you. Where are all beautiful grandchildren? They're in the kitchen cooking dinner. Oh, I want to see them. Yes. Listen. Huh? Last night, you know, after midnight, we were going to call you and then we figured you guys were probably sleeping. And we didn't want to wake you. Oh, we were awake. Yeah, way past midnight. Oh, got caught up on one of those old late night movies, didn't you? Nope. I always said you're playing cards. No. Boy, were you reading? No. Well, what were you doing? Well, now, Anna, I want to know the truth. Can I expect the same from that one? Tell the grave. Wonderful dinner. That shrimp frio was delicious. All right. Now, are you two ready to dance the night away to the Count Basie Orchestra? Yes, we are. We're out of here right now, are we? Oh, we have to. We have reservations. But, son, as I recall, last year after dinner, the whole family performed a song for us. We loved that. Anna, we wanted to perform a song this year, but we didn't have time to get it together. Heathcliff, we want our song. You heard, Claire, there's no song. Now, get out. We're not going anywhere until we get our song. You sit here. You'll have a fine view when they start. Okay, but, okay, okay, okay, okay. There is a song. What's it going to be this year? Another Rachel's number? No. One from old Blue Eyes? No. No, no. Gene Autry's singing Back in the Saddle again. I like him. It isn't Gene Autry. This year it's Anna's favorite singer, James Brown. And one, two, one, two, three, four. I got the feeling, baby, baby, I got the feeling, you don't know what to do to me. Leave my heart heavy, down in misery. I got the feeling, baby, baby, baby. Baby, I got that feeling, baby. Oh, baby. Baby. Sometimes I'm up, sometimes I'm down. Oh, oh. I'm a rally down, a level with the ground. Baby. I said, level with the ground. Hey. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. Baby. I got that feeling, baby. Can't help it. Turn. Oh, baby, baby, baby. Baby, baby, baby. Baby, baby, baby. Baby, baby, baby. Baby, baby. I'm on a field. I'm on a field. I'm on a field. I'm on a field. I'm on a field. I got what I need to be beautiful. And it's not the clothes I wear. All I need, baby, is NuFlex. FluX. NuFlex, beautiful hair. NuFlex conditioner with panthenol works from the inside. Makes your hair more beautiful outside. All I want is NuFlex. NuFlex from RevLog. NuFlex, beautiful hair. Yeah. An idea whose time has come and gone has come again. Introducing the Volkswagen Fox. At $56.90, it's German engineering everyone can afford. Again. My love for dessert almost earned me two spaces in the high school yearbook. I still love dessert, as long as it's sugar-free Jell-O pudding. But dessert, you don't have to dessert. Can't wait till the class reunion. Thank you very much. Ladies and gentlemen, we have with us tonight one of the original members of the Jazz Caravan. None other than Mr. Slide Huxtable. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Mr. Slide Huxtable. And he's here with his lovely wife, Anna, celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. I've been told by their son, and I assume he's trustworthy, that their favorite bassy tune is Shiny Stockings. And I'll tell you what, we're going to play that very tune if the Huxtables will lead off in the dancing. People love Sweet Surrender. Who's Willie? My pet dog. Let's go look at him. He needs mouth to mouth. Critics give a favorable comparison with the Cosby Show. I'm all finished, Daddy. Then why is all that food still on your plate? I have no idea. Warm, funny, beautifully performed Sweet Surrender Saturday. First place acceleration test, Volkswagen-Fox. First place cornering, Volkswagen-Fox. First place slalom, Volkswagen-Fox. First place overall points, Volkswagen-Fox. When Volkswagen introduced the Beetle in 1949, the competition didn't catch on. Now, as we introduce the $5,690 Fox, some have caught on, but none have caught up. Now's the time to make a smart move on a new Olds, because Oldsmobile offers 3.9% annual percentage rate GMAC financing on every Delta 88, Cutlass, Olds Calais. And now for the first time, the luxurious 98. That's smart. Or get as much as $1,200 cash back direct from Olds, depending on the options you buy. That's smart, too. The choice is yours. No matter how you look at it, you're going to save money on a brand new Old. Now that's the smartest move of all. See your participating Olds dealer for qualification details today. The death toll mounts on the collapse of a building in Bridgeport, late details at 11. This is the NBC Television Network. Come home to NBC. I bet we've been together for a million years. And I bet we'll be together for a million more. It's like I started breathing all the night we kissed. And I can't remember what I ever did before. What would we do, baby, without her? What would we do, baby, without her? And there ain't no nothing we can't love each other through. What would we do, baby, without her? Charlotte and I. Of the 50 million dogs in America, a million will eat like never before. One dog in 50 will enjoy a diet with quality ingredients like chicken and more nutrition per ounce than any leading dog food. A diet of new Purina O&E, short for Optimum Nutritional Effectiveness, made for one dog in 50, because only one dog owner in 50 cares this much. New Purina O&E brand dog food for that one dog, yours. Presenting, so simply soft, your family will love to put it on. Introducing new Fab with a unique advanced softening system, a powerful detergent plus a unique fabric softener, all in one. For a brilliant clean on a softness that feels so comfortable, so put it on. Put it on with new Fab for a clean that's simply soft. What are you writing, Jim? Nothing, just a poem for the school magazine. How's it coming? Okay, I guess I'm just stuck on this one line. Well, maybe I can help. You know, I don't like to brag, but in grade school I used to be quite a poet myself. They used to call me Iambic Pantameter Keaton. That's a fabulous nickname, Derek. Well, come on, Jim, read me what you've got so far. Come on. Okay. The gray world spins, we are adrift in the empty universe, lost, depressed, nothing in sight, nothing, nothing, nothing. It's cute. Maybe we should put it in our Christmas cards. Well, sure, it's cute, but isn't it a little depressing? Jen, a girl your age should be writing about flowers and sunshine and rainbows. Dad, I want to show the alienation of mankind confronted with the horror of the industrial age. Okay, but I'm sure there's a nicer way to do it. Hey, there. Hey, my guy. Alex. You want to take first place in the horror show? Pure information, Jennifer. This medal distinguishes me as a member of the Leland University Fraternity Council. It gives me jurisdiction over all fraternity matters on the Leland campus. It is a big deal. Hey, tell them what they call me, Andy. Um, Pompous Fool. No, no, no, not those guys in the pickup truck. The guys in the house with the big Greek letters on it? Mr. Big. Alex, did you have him over at the fraternity house again? Just for a minute, just for a minute. He stopped in to see the guys. He stopped from hanging around there. He's picking up some bad habits. What bad habits? Mom, he saw what college is all about. He saw people reading. He saw people studying. He saw people engaged in the scholarly pursuit of knowledge. What else did you see, Andy? Gross beer. What an imagination this little guy's got. Come on, Andy, put your beer mug away. It's time for Sesame Street. Guess what? I've been asked to play six sororities. Mallory, that's wonderful. How are you going to choose? Well, I don't know. See, Phi Kappa Gamma is the most prestigious, it's the hardest to get into, and they have the best list of alumni. But their colors are all wrong for me. How'd it go for you, Skip? I didn't have any luck with the fraternities I like, but there are a few cult groups that are interested in me. Look, Skippy, cheer up, okay? It's not so bad. Oh, Alex, that's easy for you to say. Look, you belong to a great fraternity. I would do anything to be in a fraternity like yours. Well, Skip, I, uh, I hate to see you down like this. I'll tell you what, I'll take you over to the grand chapter of my fraternity. I'll introduce you to a couple of guys. Well, Alex? I can't promise you anything. I can't promise you I can get you in. Thank you, Alex. I really appreciate this. Uh, y'all, fancy pants. This is members-only territory. Vamoose. Yeah, I'm Alex P. Keaton. I'm from the Leland chapter of Theta Pi. Oh, sorry, Brian Elliott. I'm president of the grand chapter. Ah. Yeah, I'm, uh, Dave Dubin. I, uh, want to be the president of the grand chapter. Ah. So, how can we help you, Keaton? Well, actually, fellas, I'm, uh, here to talk to you about a prospective pledge. Terrific. What's his name? Handleman. Erwin Handleman. Uh, listen, Keaton, we'd really like to help you out, but, uh, you gotta understand, we have standards, and we're not going to let you down. But, uh, you gotta understand, we have standards here. I mean, uh, Skippy Handleman's just about the nerdiest guy on campus. Yeah, well, I know that, uh, from afar he may appear that way, but you gotta meet this guy. I mean, he's very impressive. He almost got accepted in Harvard. Oh, yeah, he was just short one credit in biology and 1400 points in the SATs. Boy, that is close. Well, that's probably Skippy now. Listen, you guys do me a favor and interview him now? Sure. What are brothers for? Hey. Here. Hi. Dave Dubin? Hi. I'm Skippy Handleman. Hey, Skippy. Uh, those are for you, and there's plenty more where that came from, if you know what I mean. Please take me. You gotta take me, please. Hi, Skippy. Brian Elliott. I'm president of Theta Pi. Hello there, Brian. Well, Handleman, Alex has told me a lot about you, so why don't we get this interview underway? Yes. Alex, please, you gotta stay with me here. I don't know if they can tell, I'm a little nervous. We'll keep it our little secret, okay, Skippy? Okay. Okay, uh, for this interview we need your full name. Erwin Murray Handleman. Right, none of that's written in stone. Did you, uh, did you bring your resume there, Skip? Of course. Can you show it to him? Uh, yes, here is my courses, they're listed there, and... this is my grade point average, and... oh, this is an encouraging letter of recommendation from my mother. You know, Handleman, I really don't think we need to finish this interview. I think we know everything we need to know about you. You're definitely Theta Pi material, and we want you to pledge the fraternity. So, off he went to bluer sky to sing a song about the future. So, off he went to bluer sky to sing a song or play a game. But ere he went, he turned to cry, Robin Redbreast is my name. Can you guess, or have you heard? My little friend is but a bird. I was only seventeen when I wrote this. You're a real child prodigy, Dad. Oh, Jen, you're just being stubborn. I know this is a wonderful poem, right, Elise? I don't like it. Is your name Elise? I was talking to your mother. Okay, Jen, I'll tell you what. We'll write it together. It doesn't have to be good. Okay, Jen, now let's take another crack at it. The only thing I suggest is if you have to use a word like depressed, try to find a nice rhyme for it. Like what? How about Robin Redbreast? Mom. Mom, Mommy, you are looking at a man who just did the impossible. I mean, compared to this feat, the Alaskan Pipeline is a garden hose. The Eiffel Tower, it's a hat rack. I get Skippy Handelman into the best paternity on the Grand College campus. There is nothing I cannot do. That's really good of you, Alex. I mean, you know how important this is to Skippy. You know, Mom, I was a little nervous about going over there and asking those guys to do this for me. You should have seen them. They were falling all over themselves trying to please me. You know, I forget how powerful and omnipotent I am. I got to write a note to remind myself. Yeah, I'll remember. I'll bet you will. Hey. Eric. Alex. Uh, brought over the master list of the pledges, names, majors, their parents, net income. Hey, gimme gimme. I love going through these lists. Every chapter's showing real growth and prosperity, but we have a little problem with the grant chapter. What do you expect with those bozos? Yeah, what's the problem with the grant chapter? They're doing the big stooge again. Can you believe it? Just like these guys to do something like that. What's the big stooge? The big stooge. They pick out the nerdiest guy they can find, lie to him, tell him they're actually interested in his membership, then humiliate him for a week during hazing and then not select him. What, uh, what's the name of this big stooge? Um, Handelman. Erwin Handelman. Skippy Handelman. What's the matter? Erwin Handelman, Skippy Handelman. He's a friend of mine. I gotta tell him. Wait, you can't tell, Alex. That's against the code. You'd be betraying sacred fraternity trust. I hate this big stooge business just as much as you do, but if you breathe a word of this to Handelman, you're out of the fraternity. This is the anatomy of a whole new animal. It has a heavier backbone, powerful muscle, quick reflexes, and one tough hide. Chevy's Linger Meener 1988, full-size pickup. It's a whole new animal. The heartbeat of America. That's the day, Chevy truck. Let's see, Milano for Charlie, or Doe for Terrence, and Gladys. Dark chocolate and pecans of Geneva. Pepperidge Farm distinctive cookies inspire fierce loyalty. Everybody thinks their favorite is the best. You're right. Party's not till tomorrow. Tragic era. Friday on Roomies. I got something sweet for you. When Matt starts rockin' as a DJ, his love life gets rollin'. A wolf man is born. But when his real identity is discovered... I'm about to be publicly humiliated. ...he loses animal magnetism. That's him? Are you kidding? It must be a joke. Friday. Saturday on the Facts of Life is a breakthrough in comedy. Willy's sick. Who's Willy? My pet dog. Go look at him. He needs mouth to mouth. It's the all-new Sweet Surrender, followed by the Golden Girls playing a ridiculous tune. Goochie, goochie, goochie, goochie. And say hello to me and Missy C. When? Saturday. I came up with a great new ending to your poem. Now, wait till you hear this. The caterpillar turns into a butterfly. That's a stunning twist, Dad. But I really don't need that poem anymore. I wrote another one. Oh, well, can I read it? I tried to use some of the phrases you suggested. You know, the things that rhyme and stuff. Oh, good. Good. I looked down at the car and felt depressed, for under the tire lay Robin Redbreast. Come on, Jen, we have work to do. Mom, help. It's a part of life, honey. Hey, Mom. Hi. Did Annie go down to sleep okay? Yeah, I read him his favorite bedtime story. He was our cold by the time Nixon left for China. Alex, I can't believe Skippy. He's outside on the lawn wearing a dress, singing, I am woman, hear me roar. It's a beautiful dress. Yeah, yeah, it's initiation night at Theta Pi. It's part of the ritual to put on a fancy dress. Well, I hope he doesn't spill anything on it. I'd like to borrow it. Billy, putting his little heart into it. Got to hand it to you. It was really sweet of you to get Skippy into Theta Pi. It's done amazing things for him. He's getting more attention at school. He's more confident. It's just made a world of difference. You should be really proud of yourself. You know, I mean it. Don't be modest, Alex. I mean, how many chances do I get to compliment you? Okay. Thanks. Such a beautiful thing. Skippy's your friend, and you cared enough to go the extra mile. I mean, how many guys would do something like that? You're very special. You're really getting on my nerves here. What's the matter? All right, now, if I tell you a secret, you promise not to tell anyone? Yes. Now, I mean it, Mel. I mean, this is important. Alex, if I pray the word of it, may I pay retail for the rest of my life? All right. Here it is. Skippy's a big stooge. Alex, that secret's out. See, the truth is, he's not really being pledged into Theta Pi. See, they're stringing him along to humiliate him. They call it the big stooge. Well, wait, why would Skippy go through all this if he knows he's not getting in? He doesn't know. What? You didn't tell him? He's your friend. I don't understand. Look, it's very simple. There is a code, okay? I swore an oath. They'll throw me out of the fraternity. Well, that's the big night. Aren't you gonna wish me luck? Luck? Valerie? Skippy, I've been thinking. Tonight would be a good night for us to go out on a date. I'm sorry, Mallory, it's breaking my heart, but I have to say no. See, Theta Pi is the greatest thing that ever happened to me. Tonight's initiation night, I can't miss that. And this is the man who made it all possible, right here, Alex. Thank you, Alex. Hey, Skippy, come on in. It was nothing. Well, the next time you see me, I'll be a Theta Pi man. Don't give me that disapproving look. What disapproving look? This one. The one you saved for criminals and people with last year's haircuts. Alex, I think you're a little bit paranoid. Skippy is better off this way. I mean, you said it yourself. You said he's getting a lot more attention at school, he's more confident, he's dressing better. He may not get everything that he wants, but he'll have a couple of weeks in the limelight if he will always remember. You keep telling yourself that, Alex, and maybe someday you'll come to believe it. Hey, Keaton, what are you doing here? Where's Skippy? He's upstairs with all the other pledges. Oh, come on, who are you kidding? He's not pledging and you know it, Brian. Big stooge, huh? What the hell are you thinking about? Whoa, what are you talking about? I don't know anything about any big stooge. All right, look, this is Alex P. Keaton you're dealing with. I'm a member of the Interfraternity Council, and I go to a college where the students actually have brains. All right, so he's the big stooge. So what? I'm taking Skippy home. Hey, Keaton, if you're as smart as you say you are, you ought to know this. If you say one word about big stooge, you're out of this fraternity. You can't take away our big stooge. It's the best part of the evening. Come on, we haven't even dipped him in mustard yet. Whoa! Come on! I am woman! Hey, Alex, what are you doing here? I came to take you home, Skippy. Come on, let's go. I can't go now, Alex. They haven't even dipped me in mustard yet. Skippy, listen to me. You don't want to go in there, all right? What are you talking about, Alex? This is where all the hazing takes place. That's where they're going to vote on me. They're not going to vote on you. Keaton, this is your final warning. What do you mean they're not going to vote on me? Tell them, Brian. You tell them. Tell them what? You're not getting into Theta Pi, Skippy. They never planned on letting you into the fraternity. They were just using you as a joke. I'm sorry. Is this true, Brian? Keaton, I'm going to have you kicked out of Theta Pi so far. Your grandchildren will never get in. You can do whatever you have to do. No, no, no, this can't be true. Brian, I did everything you guys said. I brought the same clothes you guys wear. I subscribed to GQ. I even got the right kind of loafers. Two of them. You know, you got a lot of nerve, Keaton, coming in here and screwing up Hell Night. You knew all along Handelman was the big steerage. Why didn't you say something to him? You knew, Alex? Don't ever talk to me again. Hey, Alex, where have you been? I was over at Grant College, Theta Pi initiation night tonight. Well, how did it go? Is Skippy a full-fledged member now? No, Skippy's not a member. Skippy's not going to be a member. And in all probability, I'm not a member anymore either. Well, what happened? They never had any intention of letting him in. It was a joke. I mean, all they wanted to do was make fun of him. The worst part is I knew about it and I didn't say anything. Are you serious, Alex? You knew and you didn't tell him? That's right. He knew and he didn't tell. Why wouldn't you tell? Look, Ma, I don't want to go through it, okay? It's just a little too painful. You see, Alex started out trying to do something nice, which is rare in itself, which is why I remember this so well. Alex wanted to get Skippy into Theta Pi, so he took him over there. The boys said yes, but what Alex didn't know is that they had no intention of pledging Skippy. They just wanted to make him the big stooge. When Alex found out, he wanted to tell, but he couldn't tell because he was afraid of breaking the code. What code, I said? He said the code of Theta Pi. He said they'd throw him out of the fraternity, become a social outcast, ruin all his chances of a big career in business, a job on Wall Street, an apartment in New York. He said he couldn't tell. He said he wouldn't tell. But tonight, tonight he told, I love him for it. I can't believe I held it in for so long. I thought I was going to explode. You did. Skippy, you okay? You're alive. What's up? Change the dress. I'm okay. We heard what happened, honey. We're sorry. I really would like to speak to Alex alone for a little bit. Sure, sure. We were just going up anyway. Hey, you look cold. Put this on. So where'd you go anyway? I called your place five times. I went up to Grover Lake. I like to go up there after I've made a fool out of myself. I go up there a lot. Skippy, I can't tell you how sorry I am. How could you do that to me, Alex? You're the guy who's supposed to be looking out for me. I did. I tried. Well, why didn't you try a little sooner? Look, I had some reasons. Okay, I thought they were good ones at the time. They weren't. I was sworn to secrecy. I didn't want to break the code. Oh, oh, because that code is more important than me. If it was, I wouldn't have shown up there tonight. Alex, why do these things always happen to me? Why am I always everybody's big stooge? You're just not in your time yet, Skip. That's all. I mean, you'll grow into it. You know, you are going to be a late bloomer. If I don't bloom soon, they're going to have to replant me. What's wrong with me? Skippy, there's nothing wrong with you. But people are going to take advantage of you because you're a little too open. You're a little too trusting, a little too accepting sometimes, but that's their problem. Skippy, you're one of the only truly good people I know. I don't understand, Alex. You're always on the inside. I'm always on the outside. It's been that way ever since we were kids. Do you remember that time we both learned to ride bikes? You got right on, started pedaling, and kept going all the way down the hill. I got on, coasted five feet, and killed a cat. It's just that our styles are a little different, Skip. That's all. Any day now, that's going to change. You're going to take those training wheels off, and when you do, watch out world. Watch out cats. Thank you, Alex. You know, we could start sort of a fraternity of our own. All we need is a secret handshake. You got it, Skip. Wait. You did a ling-was-ling. You gave me something new I really like. More satisfaction, new. You did a ling-was-ling. You gave me new ways to eat right. Eat right. More satisfaction, new. You did a ling-was-ling. You gave me more, much more. You gave me more. Great new tastes I never had before. Ling-was-ling. For you mean cuisine entrees only from Stouffer's. It's the one with more fun, 10% more fun. The one with more fun, 10% more fun. M&M's is the one that adds more fun. More fun for everyone. 10% more M&M's chocolate candies in every pack. And we even brought the red ones back. It's the one with more fun, the one with more fun. All the chocolate fun for everyone. I wish I was sexy. Only one word describes Denny's new boyfriend. Weird. Bingo. Scott Valentine is My Demon Lover, a monstrously funny comedy rated PG-13. Starts Friday. Next, join the fun for a happy half hour on the house at Cheers, followed by the wackiest ad agency this side of Madison Avenue on Nothing In Common. Then enjoy the success of L.A. Law. It does justice to television. Hello, this is Jill Eichenberry, Anne Kelsey of L.A. Law. Make a practice of watching L.A. Law tonight on NBC. Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog. This group of doctors makes house calls to third world countries. Find out what they're doing to help the children of war on Friday's Evening Magazine at 7.30. The eyewitness news update is brought to you by Master Health Plus, the health plan that lets you choose your doctors. Hello, I'm Jack Quilley. Coming up tonight's eyewitness news at 11 o'clock in Connecticut, a desperate search is underway for more than a dozen construction workers believed trapped under the rubble of a collapsed apartment building in Bridgeport. Liz Gonzalez will have a report from the scene. Also tonight, the Chicago Bulls are in town to challenge the Celtics. In the first round of the NBA playoffs, Bob Lobel will have highlights. And Joyce Kalhawe previews the movie Project X starring Matthew Broderick. Join Liz Walker and me tonight on Nightcap. Choose the health plan that lets you choose your own doctor. Hertz announces great low weekly rates like $89 a week here in Arizona. Or only $79 a week here in Hawaii. Oh yeah, Arnie? Well, what about $99 a week here in sunny California? Or OJ, only $49 a week here in sunny Florida. Brutal, Juice, brutal. Hertz, you don't just rent a car, you rent a company. A videotape that guarantees original brilliance and sharpness even after 500 plays, this is the tape that does it, BASF. Because every time you play it, or play it again, or record over it, play after play after play, the original brilliance and sharpness always comes through. So if you're looking for the videotape that just keeps coming back for more, ask for BASF. Because play after play after play, the original brilliance always comes through. Weekend preview, Fridays at 6 on WBZ-TV4. Cheers this film before a live studio audience. Hey, Mr. Clarence back. Right there, Lee. How was your trip to Expo? Once in a lifetime experience, I tell you. No years have heard, no eyes have seen the wonders I've experienced these past two weeks in Canada. If I died right now, I'd be a happy person. You wouldn't be the only one. No, I mean, you should have seen this 3D movie they had about life in Vancouver. You know, with those glasses on, you felt like you were really there. You were there, Cliff. I've been reading up on Expo. Did you catch that bullet train they got there? No, I guess I missed that one. Did you see the Great Hall of Ramses? No, no, I guess that's good right by me. How about the U.S. space exhibit? No. Chinese acrobats? I don't know. Hey, Cliff. How was Expo? Major disappointment, Sam. Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got. Taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot. Wouldn't you like to get away? Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. And they're always glad you came. You want to be where you can see our troubles are all the same. You want to be where everybody knows your name. You want to go where people know people are all the same. You want to go where everybody knows your name. This is the anatomy of a whole new animal. It has a heavier backbone, powerful muscles, three flexes, and one top hide. Chevy's Liner Meager 1988 full-size pickup. It's a whole new animal. The heartbeat of America. That's the day Chevy truck. I may never change the look, but I'm gonna make a dent. So I give it all I got. That's 110%. I don't drink just any beer. You better understand. I play it fine, lead you to the king of beer. I'm a gingerbread man. But, but, but, but, but, but, I'm a bread man. Top a lot less than you think. Even your airfare's included. Take a three, four, or seven day cruise on Carnival. The most popular cruise line in the world. I've had arthritis for 10 years, but now I use something different. Anisine Caplets, the first coated capelet containing aspirin. The medicine doctors recommend most for minor arthritis pain. I get hours of relief. Doctor recommended Anisine, coated capelets and tablets. Tonight on Nightline, Gary Hart. Once again, the charge is womanizing. True or not, is it relevant to a presidential campaign? That story tonight. And I was sad story. An emotional story about a woman in the Denver hospital who doesn't remember who she is, nor do the authorities. Here's Tom Schill. I want to know my name so I can go back to work. At Denver General Hospital, they've nicknamed her Rose, and doctors have probed her mind with questions and hypnosis to glean bits and pieces of her past. But much mystery remains. Do you remember your mother and father? No. Do you know, have any recollection if you had a brother or sister? No. She was found at the Trailways bus station in downtown Denver a month ago, suffering from a stroke. In her pocket, a ticket stub from Kansas City to Denver. No purse, no luggage. But Denver isn't her home. I was looking at the mountains from the hospital room, and they are beautiful, but don't look familiar. Rose is getting a lot of occupational therapy at the hospital. She remembers that long ago she was a short-order cook, and she likes Mexican food. And today, she made a salad. Her body is heavily scarred. She says she remembers open-heart surgery last July, but not the doctor nor the hospital. And once, long ago, she says, there was a husband. She's even come up with what might be his name. Clarence. It was a long, long time ago. Can you remember his last name? Posey. But until someone comes along and recognizes her, the solution to her personal mystery will remain elusive. What's your name? I wish I knew. We began this program with Gary Hart. We end it with information that may be very important to his case. The woman who is alleged to have spent the night in his Washington townhouse, Donna Rice, has told the Associated Press she did not spend the night with Gary Hart in his townhouse in Washington, as the Miami Herald alleges. She goes on to say she is not romantically involved with Hart. She called their weekend activities all very innocent. Donna Rice, who spoke just a short while ago in Miami to reporters for the Associated Press, said, if there was anything going on, we would have been cautious, but we had absolutely nothing to hide. Nobody had anything to hide. And to repeat, she said again, I do not know if he was attracted to me, but there was nothing between us. I did not have sexual relations with Gary Hart. That's our report on world news tonight. I'm Peter Jennings. We'll have more on this story tomorrow. We'll be in Washington for the Iran hearings as well. Good night. You can't expect me to turn that into a singer. Sylvester Stallone's turn in country? This chick has got some body. With Dolly Parton giving lessons, anything goes. Sweet. You're the best friend I ever had. Who says I don't bring flowers anymore? I love you. No matter what the occasion, no matter what the reason, no one takes more care to show you care than the Stop and Shop Family Florist. Say Happy Mother's Day with a pink lavender or yellow pastel bouquet. Your choice, $4.99. All this week, Service Merchandise and Black & Decker have got some great ideas for Mom waiting for you. Surprise Mom with Black & Decker's Space Maker Toaster Oven. It bakes, broils and toasts and mounts easily under the cabinet. Sale price, $79.97. And also this week, Service Merchandise has Black & Decker's handy Dust Buster Plus cordless vac. It takes the hassle out of those little messes. Sale price, $29.94. You'll find all this and more this week at Service Merchandise. Between love and madness lies obsession. Calvin Klein's obsession now takes over the body. Ah, the smell of it. Oh, the feel of it. At Lord and Taylor. Chronicle is closed captioned for the hearing impaired with a grant provided by Honeywell Bull. Tonight on Chronicle, made in Massachusetts, the people, the products, the profits of Bay State business. First stop, Worcester, where Table Talk Pies is trying to cook up a comeback. Then we'll visit the Haverill Factory of Falcone Pianos. Here, quality and craftsmanship are the keys to success. And what do you, Larry Bird and Roger Clemens have in common? You may all be wearing rings made by the Balfour Company of Attleboro. Tonight, Peter Mahigan, Mary Richardson, with Andrea Hall, and Mike Barnicle. Reporting for Chronicle, New England's nightly news magazine. Good evening. Mary Richardson is on assignment tonight, and Andrea Hall joins me. Peter, we start off tonight with a comeback story worthy of a Sylvester Stallone script, Table Talk Pies. Your mother may have packed them in your lunchbox. Perhaps they were a staple on your Thanksgiving table. We even heard of one brazen housewife who actually entered a Table Talk Pie in a homemade cooking contest. And like a true champ, the Table Talk Pie won the contest. But recently, this prize-winning pastry was battling for survival, a battle it appears to have won. The crusty old veteran is back in the race. After two years of forced retirement, the Table Talk Pie is doing battle again in the snack business, and company officials hope tradition will make them a winner. Co-owner, Chris Cocaine. We get letters from customers saying that they're glad we're back, and they feel the quality that we had 20 years ago is now back in the marketplace. It all started 60 years ago when Theodore Tonah and Angeles Cotsitas combined to open a bakery on Worcester's East Side. In the 30s, they moved to a bigger building. In the 40s, they moved again to the present location in Kelly Square. Business boomed. It started slowly, obviously, but they kept progressing, and it just seemed to catch on. The crust, I guess, is what you might say is what really made them famous, because they had a crust that was flaky and it hadn't been duplicated by anybody else. In the 60s, business peaked. As babies boomed, Table Talk baked. A million pies a week rolled out of its eight huge ovens. It was the largest operation of its kind in the world, selling pies throughout New England, New York, and New Jersey. We employed, oh, I think somewhere between 800 and 1,000 people throughout New England, and we had somewhere between around 400 around salesmen out in all over New England. Today, Table Talk employs 15, and only one oven is running. After the original owners sold out, the bakery's business began to cool. In 1984, bankrupt, Table Talk shut down. The largest pie factory in the world became a lot of empty space, victim of changing tastes and missed opportunities. Production manager, George Stevens. I don't think we diversified fast enough. That was one of our problems. I think back in the 70s, we should have noted that there was a change from eating pies, really. There were a lot of different varieties of snacks on the market at that time. The new Table Talk is counting on its junior pie to get it back in the market. It's a process that starts with the hands of Tom Fish. You just grab a clump and drop it in. Oh, it's fun. You get to play in the dough. Table Talk once produced and processed many of its own fruits for fillings. Today, it gets its fill from outside farmers. A typical wheat consumes 3,000 pounds of cherries, 5,000 pounds of blueberries, and 9,000 pounds of apples. The apples come from New York State. It's a fresh frozen. We have to thaw them. Add spices and cook 3,500 pounds at a time. Then after it's cooked, we cool it down. That's what's happening now, it's cooling. The centerpiece of Table Talk is the 80-foot oven. This is not like mom used to bake them. Up to 3,500 pies can cook at one time in 400-degree heat. The trip through takes 15 minutes. At the other end, Chris Hager waits to inspect the final product. Oh, a lot of them aren't cooked, for instance, underneath. The pie is dented or creased. It won't cook underneath, so it's rough. A lot of them just get crushed along the process. The bad pies get put aside. The good ones, about 180,000 a week, are rushed off to be packaged and shipped. It's important to get the pies out in the stores while they're still fresh. They're good sellers. A lot of people ask for them when we don't have them. Eddie Farina says Table Talk holds its own on the shelves at Pinellas Market in Needham. He says the pies' return is getting good reviews. I grew up with the pies, and they were off the market for a while, and then they were back on. So they were good. A lot of people like a real pie instead of artificial stuff. And Chris Cocaine likes sales so far. We've had phenomenal success, and we're very happy with it. It's growing steadily every week. If business grows enough, the bakery may start making larger pies again and also add flavors. It all depends on whether consumers remember Table Talk the way Chris Cocaine hopes they do. I think it's part of nostalgia, it's comfort and security. Not everybody, but a good portion of people you meet that talk about Table Talk, talk about in terms of how they grew up with a pie when they were going to school, going to college. Right now, Table Talk will try to get back its slice of the market. Eventually, they hope to get a bigger piece of the pie. I'm one of those people. I remember Table Talk pies. I used to only want the lemon. Now, they were producing a million pies a week at one time. They were really grinding them out. They were so big at one time that they used to buy the entire blueberry production of Prince Edward Island, the whole thing, the whole island. Every blueberry up there would come to Boston. But they're starting small, Andrea. The goal is to get a little bigger, but they don't want to overextend. They're in the convenience stores. They hope to get into the supermarkets, and that's a bit of a tougher nut to crack. They'll get their piece, I'm sure. The sound of music echoes in an old shoe factory in Haverhill. More made in Massachusetts when Chronicle returns. Tonight's Chronicle is sponsored in part by Wish Radio. How is Wish 99.5 FM different from all other radio stations? Wish 99.5 plays 40-minute music sweeps of easy favorites of the 60s, 70s, and 80s. Discover 40-minute music sweeps of easy favorites on WSSH 99.5 FM. The Boston Globe business pages are a great way to learn how to handle your money. Things like how to budget, invest, save on taxes. They've got a whole staff of expert financial advisors, and frankly, I could use their help. See, when I told my mom about that big star that's just got $10 million for 12 weeks' work, she said, Yes, but what's he going to do for the other 40 weeks? You see, my mom figures your odds better off getting $100 every week than just getting $10 million all at once. It's that kind of sound financial advice that makes you realize just how much you need the Boston Globe. Surprise! The Fuel-Injected CRXSI at your New England Honda dealer. If things aren't going just your way, why not make it a Bradley's Day? Bradley's has it! Someone to help you out and show you the way. Someone to help you out, you'll know what to say. Bradley's customer service assistant at the registrile to make those busy times better times. Where else would you shop when Bradley's has it? Why don't you make it a Bradley's Day? Starting your own business is always a risky proposition, but when you take aim at the top of the line companies and expect to carve yourself a piece of the action, well, that takes a special combination of courage and skill. Exactly true, Peter, but that is just what Santi Falcone has done. He's taken a small factory in Haverhill filled with lumber, steel, cable and ivory, and is turning out some of the finest pianos in the world. It is a true story of American Enterprise, whose star is an Italian immigrant. I've always found it very appealing to get behind a product, and I've been selling dead composers for all these years, and I thought I'd get into something more interesting like living pianos. Who better to sell pianos than a pianist? Virginia Esquenez expanded her repertoire as a concert artist to join hands with Santi Falcone, a man who is well on his way to putting the grand back into piano. It boils down to a man who is very serious about making an extremely complicated thing. A piano is made up of many different items that fatigue over years or don't, and I've been a Steinway artist on the circuit for the last 15 years, and I'll come right out and say it, I've met a lot of very bad pianos on my tours, and I'm despaired. And so did Falcone, so much so that four years ago in a small shop in Woburn, he played with the idea of building a better piano. It was basically a weekend piano. It was made Saturdays and Sundays just to see how things would fit, and once I convinced myself, yes, I could build a piano, I went full guns at it, and this is the end result. At the turn of the century, Boston was the home of the great piano makers, Chickering, Henry F. Miller, Mason, and Hamlin. The Depression and ultimately foreign competition sounded the final chord for the local industry. Pianos were cranked out on assembly lines, and the solo craftsman was lost in the chorus of mass production. Today, just four years after building its first piano, the Falcone Piano Company has taken over a six-story shoe factory in Haverhill. The art of piano making has returned to Massachusetts, and Falcone has returned artistry to the craft. We don't have an assembly line here. A piano will remain at its station until everything is correct. Looks good. Perhaps it is poetic justice that the piano was Falcone's forte, since it was one of his countrymen, a man named Cristofori, who invented the first piano in Florence, Italy in 1709. Santi Falcone came to this country from Sicily at age 14. His family settled in Somerville, and while still in high school, he began tuning and maintaining the pianos at Boston Conservatory of Music. At the same time, he was going to aviation school and earned a commercial pilot's license, but the piano was his passion. And after a tour of duty in Vietnam, Santi opened a store in Waltham to sell and rebuild pianos. Seven stores later, he knew what he really wanted to do. It takes 600 hours to build one piano. There are 75 to 80 in progress right now, all signed to waiting customers. The key to the operation is careful attention to detail and materials. The wood, mainly rock maple, comes from New England, and the keys are ivory, not plastic. The factory employs 56 skilled woodworkers and cabinet makers. At the tail end of the product, such as right now, is where we need extremely good technicians that can take the piano and able to tune it, to voice it, to regulate it, to get it from a raw stage to a musical stage. Anthony and Joseph Paratori, brothers from Belmont, have also made it to the musical stage as world-class duo pianists. They began their career with lessons in Boston about the same time that Falcone was tuning pianos at Boston Conservatory. Today, Falcone supplies the piano when they perform locally, an arrangement that has been good for both. Being able to speak with Mr. Falcone about certain technicalities, about the action of the tone, and with him so that he can bounce off of us as performers is very valuable to him and us. But making a piano is just part of it. You have to be able to sell it, too. So to market his product, Falcone is setting up shop in Park Square, an area that has been traditionally known as Piano Row. And traditionally dominated by Steinway and Baldwin. Falcone, who only makes grand pianos, not uprights, sells the smallest ones for $19,000. The nine-foot concert grands go for $41,000, easily competitive with Falcone's rivals. Still, the real sales pitch is performance. We're getting a lot of questions on the road, out of state now, from piano technicians and other professionals who want to know more about it. So I think it's a piano that's here to stay. I feel like applauding. Great story, really. There's an article here in Industry Magazine that raises the question that if, in fact, Falcone makes the world's best piano, the people won't be buying it until the world's best pianists start playing it, and the world's best pianists aren't going to play it until more people start buying it. Well, it's hard, I guess. I mean, you think about every single one that they make up there is already subscribed. I mean, there's a compliment for your product. It's sold before it even goes out the door. You're absolutely right. Coming up next, guess who's put a ring on Larry Bird's finger? We'll tell you in a moment. The Underground Camera presents the Chinon Splash. It's automatic, weatherized for protection from water and sand. On a low exposure and focus for razor sharp pictures, even in total darkness. Hello? The Splash. $149.97 at Underground Camera. Summer's coming. So, pick up a Kodak 3-pack and get 12 more pictures free. You need a camera and film. It's all on sale now at Underground Camera's 32 locations. Your basic soft wheat bread has about a smidgen of whole wheat. The new WonderSalt 100% whole wheat bread has a whole parcel. And that's a difference we can all sink our teeth into. Wonder we eat Just a little slice of America Wonder Bread Part of life in America Wonder Bread Wonder Bread My grandmother came to America from Norway at the turn of the century. Now this Norwegian is going home to Greece. Barbara Rush, family and friends, went home to Greece in September. She said it was a dream vacation and shopping trip come true. My grandparents left Poland and Russia and came to Brooklyn. Now at last I'm going home to Greece. The Sadakas are jetting to the most beautifully affordable country in Europe, Greece. And Olympic Airways will fly them there in style. This is your year to go home to Greece. You were miles apart when it began. At times the distance between you seemed insurmountable. But with the dawn came agreement and a partnership was born. For this and all your significant moments, Omega. Available at Long's Jewelers. This is Scott Valentine and I play Nick on Family Ties. A lot of people will lead you to believe that drugs are cool and it's the thing to do. If you don't want to do them, don't do it. Don't be pushed. So you and Roger Clemens may have something in common after all. But it isn't that blistering fastball that almost hurtled you into the minor leagues. No, it's something tamer, far less exciting, but nevertheless profitable. For the LG Balfour Company in Attleboro. Mary Richardson has a report. It is a ritual Boston sports fans have grown accustomed to this past year. The presentation of championship rings. The Celtics, Red Sox, and in a private ceremony the Patriots all partook of the festivities. Each team member receiving a memento that will be cherished for a lifetime. Long after the cheering has become a faint echo. It is a ritual the LG Balfour Company has presided over for decades. Most of the championship rings on famous fingers throughout the country have been made by the Massachusetts firm. And chances are good your own high school or college ring is a Balfour creation. You'll find the company's headquarters in downtown Attleboro, straddling the quaint 10-mile river. Two additional facilities complete the picture. A one-time foundry houses the tooling plant in nearby Norton. And in suburban Attleboro stands the brand new ring plant, less than one year old. The company's history though goes back more than 70 years. Director of marketing services Jim Lutz. The founder of the company, LG Balfour, was a fraternity and university student at the University of Indiana. He decided after some observation he saw that fraternity and sorority badges were not produced to any uniform quality. His better idea was to approach the national sororities and fraternities and suggest manufacturing to their quality standards a suitable badge used throughout the United States. Those golden Greek letters are still big sellers on campus. But their outgrowth is a product that has come to define the Balfour company, the gold ring. Its production is highly complex. This is one of the final ideas that will be submitted. Before you can have a ring you must have a design. So production actually begins here where artists translate the ideas of clients onto paper. Designer Richard Allen. We have the sales force fill out their sketch requests after talking to the customer for the first time. And then we interpret the sketch request forms, do the sketches that they've requested. They're given back to the salesman and then back to the customer itself. The design is then shipped up to the tooling plant where individual molds are constructed for each and every ring made. The etchings have to be perfect. A flawed mold will only lead to a flawed ring. To achieve this accuracy at a much higher volume, high tech has come to Balfour in the form of computer engraving. The design is recorded digitally, then reproduced onto the screen in 3D form. The computer in turn runs the engraver next door. Then it's onto the ring plant itself where wax impressions of the rings are arranged into trees and placed into cylinders. A substance much like plaster of Paris is mixed by something resembling grandmother's old Hamilton beach and poured over the wax molds. Then it's thrown into the oven where the wax melts away, leading room for the gold to be poured back in. Ah yes, the gold, the precious metal that makes these rings so special. It is refined right in the basement at Balfour headquarters. We're a significantly large user of gold in the United States in general. Balfour uses in excess of 50,000 ounces of gold annually. The metal of choice is gold and probably always will be gold. It's a timeless metal, intrinsically valuable. Back at the ring plant, those gold pellets are poured into the plaster molds, melted in the oven and presto, a tree of gold rings ready for the final refinement. There's a wealth of craftsmanship and really artistic talent that is designed into the product by people who have been doing it for many, many years. Yet on the other hand, there have been some breakthroughs in technology that enable us to do a job that might have been tedious or slower, more quickly with perhaps a more precise or uniform level of quality. Our laser engraving is a good example of that. It's needed to supplant or to be used in addition to hand engraving. One more thing, the elaborate ductwork snaking its way throughout the ring plant is not central air conditioning. It's all part of a giant vacuum system reclaiming all the gold dust that flies around. The latest championship ring that BAL4 has designed, delivered, is the New York Mets World Championship Baseball Ring from last fall. I'm sure we all in this area remember that series. Certainly athletes over and over will repeat the phrase, the ring's the thing. And Craig James of the Patriots says it all a different way. The wealthiest man in the world can't go by the World Championship Ring. He's got to play and earn it. WBZ Radio's Dave Maynard is spreading the word about Boston's number one morning show while riding the famous racehorse Lightning. Ride with a winner, WBZ Radio, for news, accu-weather, sports, traffic, and everything you need for a good start. Listen to Radio 10-30 with Maynard in the morning and get a real jump on the day. Count on us to help. Maynard in the morning on WBZ Radio 10-30, especially on those days when you're dragging. When you get an allergy attack, you'll try any advice. Any advice. Try the desert. But the best advice is what doctors have said millions of times. Take Dymatap. Dymatap in non-prescription formulas brings proven relief. So take the advice of doctors and pharmacists for allergies. I see the desert worked. And take Dymatap, the best advice you can take. Hawaii. Lush, tropical, enchanting paradise. Like no place else in the world. No wonder everyone wants to go there. And Delta makes it easy with low fares and daily flights to Honolulu. Ask about our Hawaiian fly-in drive and get an Alamo rental car for an entire week for just $55. Delta gets you there with care. Won't you join us? If you're putting the wrong frozen dinner into your microwave, you never know how it'll come out. But now, Armour Dinner Classics are made to taste great out of the microwave. Dinner Classics prepares every portion individually. That way, everything is properly cooked at the same time. So Dinner Classics tastes delicious instead of, well, microwaved. Sorry. Armour Dinner Classics. Now specially made to taste great out of your microwave. The real estate game. It's not really a game because it's played with your money. So before you take a chance, you'd better know the house rules. Deciding whether to sell or buy. Discovering the best values. Or exposing the dangers of equity loans. See how you can play with your house and come out a winner when New Center 5 reports the real estate game. Tomorrow at 6 on New England's New Center 5. It might give you the edge that puts you ahead of the game. That's it for tonight's edition of Chronicle. Tomorrow night we'll go inside the mind of a murderer. The story of Marty Apple, a college graduate and former military officer who held up a bank in East Bath, Pennsylvania last June 6th and killed three employees in cold blood. We'll examine what may have motivated Apple's murderous outburst, which has left deep scars in a small Pennsylvania town. I'm Andrea Hall. Don't forget the special coming up next. It's the Celtics Playoff Special on the road to 17. Thanks for joining us tonight. I'm Peter Mehegan. I'm Chet Curtis. One of the hottest rock bands around is in Worcester tonight. Maybe you've heard of U2, but have you ever heard their music? At 11, Dixie Watley, New Center 5 Entertainment Editor, reports on yet another sold out performance by U2. Join us at 11. You know, any way you look at it, Coronet's Family Pack is a better buy. It costs less per sheet and less per roll. It gives you a soft two-ply bath tissue for the price of a one-ply. But even that doesn't tell you how good it really is. For years, Coronet's been the most popular family pack in America. That's how good it is. Look for the Great American Giveaway Game on specially marked packages of Coronet paper products. Enter it and you can win some great prizes. Burger King brings you baseball players' cups with the Boston champs at bat. Bob, Evan, Ruffner, and Baylor brings them home. Get two Boston players on every cup. Four cups for you to bring home. A different one each week filled with 16 ounces of Pepsi for a special price with any food purchase. Take them all home for a special price. From Burger King. The Parts Plus Promise. We promise to find the auto part you've got to have. The hard-to-find part you can't miss without a doubt. The right part the first time or blow a gasket dry. Yeah! Now at Parts Plus, enter and win the Repair America Sweepstakes. We got the Parts Plus, the Smarts at Parts Plus. This is WCVB-TV. Programs regularly seen at this time will not be presented because of the following Channel 5 special. Sixteen was sweet, but another banner in 1987 would be sweeter. Bruised and battered, the Boston Celtics are on the road to 17. Sports Center 5 presents Playoff Report, On the Road to 17. Sponsored in part by Today's Chevrolet. A bouncing ball, parquet floor, shamrock and leprechaun. Easily recognizable symbols as the most dominant franchise in the history of sports, the Boston Celtics. Good evening everyone, I'm Mike Lynch along with Mike Dowling. Welcome to Playoff Report, On the Road to Number 17. And it's playoff time, Michael, here we go again. Yeah, the Celtics try to become the first team in 18 years to repeat back to back since the Celtics of 68 and 69. And it's funny because there are a lot of likenesses between those two teams, between the team of 68 and 69 and this year's team. Like that season, there were skeptics that said the Celtics could not come out and repeat, but all of a sudden the tail end of that Chicago series, the Celtics all of a sudden came alive. They're a different team, they're ruthless when playoff season comes around. It's funny because those back to back losses to Philadelphia and Milwaukee that last weekend that we'll talk about later in the show. Those were the worst back to back losses in Celtic history back to the 68, 69 team when they performed the same thing, had horrible losses back to back. We've got a lot in store for you tonight. In the next 60 minutes, we're going to begin with the present. We're going to chronicle the Celtics playoff series to date. Here they are again, renewing their annual springtime ritual, playoff basketball at the Garden. But this year there are whispers that the Celtics can be had. Are the old men up to it? And what about those injuries and the bench? How high will the bird fly? The Chicago Bulls are the first test and it becomes apparent that both their Jordan and the bird will be grounded in game one. Larry, double teamed all night, manages just seven shots. But with his assistance, the Celtics run up a 19 point halftime lead. It would look good if there was a 24 minute game. We'd all be slapping high fives in here. But those high fives would belong to the Bulls in the second half. Jordan finally gets off the ground, briefly. And in the end it becomes a two minute game, all tied at 100 apiece. Dennis Johnson shows that he's up to it with a clutch jump, the Celtics lead by two. But Sadale III, of all people, would answer for Chicago. He would do it again, keeping the Bulls tied at 104. But then the Chief, Robert Parrish, took matters into his own hands. On their final possession, the Bulls had a chance to tie it up, but they turned it over. A win for the Celtics, but hardly one to brag about. What happens is that you start playing to not lose rather than playing to win. There's really no sense in letting them back in like that. There's no excuse. I don't think that we can say we got lulled to sleep, all this crap. We didn't play well. But are they really worried? No. And Larry is still smiling at the start of game two. And he serves notice right away that he'll take more than seven shots this time. And his counterpart would also break out. Jordan soars and scores 42 points. Like game one, the lead fizzled and the Bulls were up by two in the fourth. We were in trouble and we better punch in and get to work. And that's exactly what we did. Six minutes ago I think we finally woke up and decided to play a little bit of defense. And do they ever, forcing six Chicago turnovers in the next five and a half minutes. The Celtics pull out another win, 105-96, but they paid a huge price for it. For Kevin McHale, jams his right ankle on the basket support. He is doubtful for game three, as are the Bulls, down two games. I think we're still confident that we can beat them. Right now we're going to go back home and plan to come back hopefully next Sunday. I think the crowd had a lot to do with it. They really inspired them when it was three points down. And sometimes that can inspire you and make you push it up a notch. And hopefully when we go home, if we play a close basketball game like we did today and Thursday, that crowd could be the sixth man for us also. There's never any doubt about that here in Chicago. Take Boston Garden at 5,000 seats, just as many decibels and a lot more flash, and you've got Chicago Stadium. The Celtics come in already wounded. McHale will sit this one out. So Fred Roberts will get the call in McHale's place. And these Bulls are seeing red. The action is fast and furious. There will be no early Celtic lead on this night. Both sides come out running, trading baskets. After two lackluster games in Boston, the emotion of this Chicago crowd spills onto the court, and it shows. Dennis Johnson has been wearing Michael Jordan like a glove all night. It's not easy. Without the picks, you know, the guy is a sure talent. When he gets picks, I mean, he's two or three times harder just to guard. But D.J. is up to it. This would not be one of Jordan's better nights, and his misses quite often would turn into Celtic points. A Jordan drive, however, does give the Bulls a one-point halftime lead. I felt we were very, very lucky to be that close. And I said, well, here we are. We got another 24 minutes to play. Let's go out there and just let it all loose, put it on the defensive end, and kick some butt. It seems both clubs have the same idea. And for the first time in this series, as Johnny Most would say, it starts to get nasty. Without the battle, the Bulls build up a 7.4th quarter lead. Charles Oakley hits once, then hits again much harder. That could have been the wake-up call that the Celtics needed. After that blow, Roberts is loose and hits. But the guy you don't want to get mad is Larry Bird because he gets even. He and D.J. would combine for the knockout punch that would put the Bulls away. I came underneath, D.J. just put it right up there, and I got fouled on and went in. And like I've always said, if it's a close, I like to have the ball. And if I don't get it, I like D.J. to have it. It came from Roberts. That philosophy gets the Celtics a 105-94 sweep. That plus a perfect 19 for 19 from the foul line. McHale's absence may have been a blessing in disguise. One thing this team does is that we cover up very, very well. Anytime one of our key persons or anybody on the team that's missing, everybody helps out everybody. On their road to title flag number 16 last year, the Celtics ran into very few obstacles on the road. However, that was not the case this season. They struggled. However, they looked very impressive when they clinched their series against the Bulls out in Chicago, and perhaps that might turn things around. Mike Darling was in Chicago when the Celtics wrapped up that series. Well, it has not all been fun and games for the Green this year, especially when the Celtics have been wearing their Green, because for the first time in a long time, they've actually had a losing record on the road, 20 and 21 this year, for the Eastern Conference champs. And it all started with that lost weekend in December. Oh, long, long way. If I die, what's your reason? At times this year, the Celtics may have wondered if they would ever finish the long race of the 82-game regular season, especially the 41 contests on the road, where Celtics teams passed have resembled Roger Clemens facing the Seattle Mariners. But this year, the Celtics on the road looked like Luxembourg invading the United States, Ryan Holloway trying to block Richard Dent, Mark Sullivan trying to hit a curve ball. Watching highlights of Celtic games is supposed to be like watching your kids on the rides in Fantasyland. But recapping this year's Celtic road season is more like Adventureland. In fact, we're talking the haunted house. Scary trips into haunted houses all over the NBA. You wouldn't want your kids re-entering these haunted houses, because more often than not, the kids could not handle it. Starting with the season's first loss of the year, a loss at Milwaukee's haunted house, the Mecca, and two other buildings proved just as mysterious for the Celtics, the Spectrum in Philadelphia and the Omni in Atlanta, where the Celtics hadn't lost in five years. The Celtics failed to win one game in those three buildings this year. But even worse than that are two buildings and two mediocre teams that have never put fear into the hearts of Celtics before, the Cavaliers Coliseum in Cleveland and Market Square Arena in Indianapolis, where the Celtics lost four more games. DJ and Danny, a little lack of communication. After the last weekend in Philadelphia and Milwaukee, the Green did manage to win four straight out west. And they started to play in opposing arenas as if they owned them. A month later, the Celtics won four more in a row out there, until they got a little too close to the Magic Kingdom and the real haunted house in Southern California, as they blew a 17-point lead to the Lakers, losing 106-103. After a loss to Utah and Salt Lake, the Green looked like they had overcome their fear of being away from home, recording impressive wins in Dallas and Houston. But that's when the Celtics became afraid of the dark again, losing their next nine of 10 away from the friendly confines of Boston Garden. Larry Bird said the Green were just coming to play rather than coming to win. Included in this stretch may be the two most frustrating losses of the year. The Celtics faced an injury-depleted New York Knicks squad that resembled a CBA team at best. That didn't stop the New Yorkers, who beat the Celtics for the second time this season in the Madison Square Garden. Just a week and a half later, five games remained on the schedule, and the Celtics were just five wins away from their fourth 60-win season in a row. And a win this night in the Meadowlands against the league's second-worst team would guarantee them a winning record on the road. But for the first time during the Bird era, the Celtics would end the year with a losing record on the road, by losing to the Nets for the second time this season. Just one road contest remained in Indianapolis, with the Celtics that already lost once this season. The Celtics were now in a battle for home court advantage in the East. It was time to try and gain momentum for the playoffs. Every game was crucial, especially with something to prove on the road. And they started to exercise all the ghosts and goblins that had hunted them all year, with a convincing win. Can you turn it on after being a, what, 20-21 team during the season? We played really well in Indiana. I thought that that was one of our best road games in a long time, not because we won, but just how we went about the game. And you know, you're right, you can't turn it on and off. And if we have one problem this year, that's the fact that we think we can do that. And anytime you start thinking that, that's when you have big problems. We just have to wait and see. And without Kevin McHale, the Celtics did exactly that, with a strong fourth-quarter performance to close out the Bulls. Can you really turn it around just like that? No, I don't think so. I think we tried turning it around in the New Jersey game we lost. We tried turning it around in the Cleveland game we lost. But we did turn it around in the Indiana game. I mean, we tried and tried. And you know, you don't do it overnight. This has been a month-long process. Still to come, Clark Booth is going to look back at some of those great Celtic championship teams of the past. And a lot more coming up on the Playoff Report, the road to number 17. 95% of Chevy Nova owners would recommend their new Nova to a friend. If that doesn't mean much to you, think about this. Of the cars you've owned, how many would you recommend to a friend? New Chevy Nova. This import was styled in Europe, but it's not an Audi or a BMW. It's built in Japan, but it's not a Honda or a Mazda. It's a Chevy called Spectrum, made in Japan, imported by Chevrolet. The pessimist sees the glass as half-empty. The optimist sees the glass as half-full. We, however, see it as a way to quench a thirst, boil an egg, or make something grow. Seeing the possibilities is capitalism at its best. And why you'll never look at a glass of water quite the same again. Cheers and leave it, brothers. Minds over money. Terrific road trip. Hi, I'm Casey Jones. As a professional basketball coach, I know that good health and fitness are essential. That's why of all the health plans around, the Tufts Health Plan is my number one choice. You not only get full health care coverage, but Tufts gives you their exclusive fitness benefit. Which means membership in your choice of many fine fitness centers, with nautilus, swimming, whirlpool, even basketball. It all goes to prove that Tufts wants to see you healthy. Nissan's introduced more new cars in a year than anyone in history. Plus, a whole new attitude. We got the power to make you move. We make you feel like driving. We make you feel like driving. They're waiting for you. The wide-open Pulsar NX. The longest wide-body van. And the Pathfinder, four by four of the year. We make you feel like driving. And the name is Nissan. Throughout most of this 86-87 season, most of the focus and most of the attention has been on the starters. And why not? Those are the guys that have been on the floor most of the time. As for the bench, well that's a problem that Casey Jones had all season, Michael. He certainly did. He has a great seat for the ball game right here. But when he looked down his bench, he saw Fred Roberts and Darren Day, Connor Henry, a couple of newcomers. He really didn't use the bench all that much. A lot of people criticize him for that. Jack Edwards has that story now. Get away with it as Walton bowels inside. What happened to the green team? Bill Walton, Scott Wedman, Jerry Seesting, and Rick Carlisle, along with either Larry Bird or Kevin McHale. Walton was reduced to getting his laughs from the bench, as the injuries which have darkened his career cast long shadows again. Wedman spent the season as a spectator, except for a brief playing stint in the fall. He contributed but 20 points to the cause this year. Rick Carlisle played more piano than basketball. By season's end, he had been relegated to the end of the bench. There weren't many moments like this. Great play by Seesting and Carlisle. And Day, back over to Seesting. Seesting holds, Seesting fires, Seesting hits, but down to eight. The bench has really put on a show here. What could have been and should have been. Len Bias with 29. Oh my! And he made the steal in a jam! It will haunt Celtics fans for years to come. This was to have been the season in which the green team got great on the winged feet of Len Bias. With him, the Celtics might have had not only the best team in basketball, they might have had two of the best. But we were all robbed. Leonard Bias died of cocaine intoxication. On picture day, the new face would be Fred Roberts. How's green and white suit you? It's kind of intimidating right now, but it's really exciting. Roberts would not exactly be really exciting himself, but he has proven to be a serviceable substitute at forward. Roberts' ability to run helped him outlast Coach Casey Jones' midseason crisis in confidence in him. So what happened to the green team? They became the green individuals, plugged in one at a time. We get kind of dispersed and mixed up within the starting team, and we don't really have four or five guys that play as the unit like we did last year. Seesting has become an integral element, the third guard who provides scrappiness and the automatic medium range jumper. And Darren Day has acquired a role, something he has finally defined after spending, like Roberts, some time in limbo. You know exactly what's expected of you to come in there in the game. In my case, I'm not going to be playing 10, 15 minutes at a time where it's going to be four or five minutes. So I know my job is to play tough defense and rebound and get the ball to the right people at the right time. That's the key to being a part-time player. What happened to the part-time team is that its center got hurt, and without a center you don't have a team. You just have a collection of players. The subs got so much attention as a unit last year that their lack of production this time around has become the local preoccupation. You're always going to say something. The team won 67 games last year, and this year I guess we won 59. But when you think about it, does Bill Walton mean those eight games, when all those games came down to winning by two or three points? I think he does. I think he was the key reason why we didn't win as many games this year. I think we played well in stresses this year, and there were stresses where we didn't play well, especially towards the end of the season on the road. But this is a whole new season. The playoffs is a whole new deal, and I don't think they're going to come into play as much because we know the starters are going to play a lot anyway. That's what happened last year, which people tend to forget. In the postseason, the green team was reduced to Walton, Seesting, and Wedman. This year it'll be Walton, Seesting, Roberts, and Day. And what of the starters? Robert Parrish has had a stellar season operating in the shadow of his fellow frontliners, and Parrish says he has never felt stronger at this stage of a season. Bird is bird. He's going to log the most minutes when it counts, even if he's bleeding. Kevin McHale has shown the most signs of wear and tear, but Roberts has shown that he is an able insurance policy. In the backcourt, Danny Ainge has become a shooting star. And there may not be a tougher man than Dennis Johnson, especially in the biggest of games. Labels can distort perception. Was the green team as such the difference between the Celtics and the rest of the league last year? No. In the NBA playoffs, you live and die with your starters. The green team turned out to be one red head with a couple of extras mixed in. The depth of the Celtics then and now rides on the fragile feet of Bill Walton. The chronicling of the green team has been the chronicling of Walton's year, and at last he is getting closer to where he wants to be. This is Jack Edwards reporting. When I was growing up, you know, UCLA and the Boston Celtics were my team. I loved their style, I loved their personnel, and you know, fast breaking based on speed and hustling, pressing defense. That's the way I liked it. All the doors like those one time will open up again. I'll be back in the high life again. All the eyes that once me once could smile and take me in. And I'm drinking that one hand drink, and there's the world back into me. And so I'll be a sight to see, back in the high life again. It's everything I wanted, and it's more. It's more exciting, it's more fun, it's more fulfilling, it's more thrilling, it's more satisfying. There's nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile. Let's go, yeah. We want it. You used to be the best, to make life be like to me. And I'm hoping you're still out there, and you're like you used to be. So have a good time, and for that's the morning sun. I will let the good times come in, and we will stop till we're done. We'll be back in the high life again. All the doors like those one time will open up again. We'll be back in the high life again. All the eyes that once me once could smile and take me in. And we're drinking back with one hand free, and have the world so easily. Good to be back. Great to be back. Back in the high life again. The Volvo 760, the car for people whose means have changed, but whose values haven't. One word distinguishes the American Express card from the others. Member. I seem to have lost my wallet with all my cards. To us, Steven Gardner is a member. Mr. Gardner, I can have a new card for you by tomorrow. And at American Express, our card members are entitled to a world of privileges. We lost our card, our cash. Even our passport. You've come to the right place. I can help you. That's great. I think I can fix it, honey. That's why I got buyer's assurance. Hello, American Express. I left my prescription medicine at home. Don't worry. Global Assist can help. I know we're late. We have an assured reservation. We have a room waiting. Mrs. Kelly, I found you an attorney and he speaks English. Oh, and you're very old. Just in case. Oh, Daddy. Bangkok today? Yeah. Yeah, I'm packed. Members carry our promise of respect, recognition, unsurpassed personal service. Membership has its privileges. To apply for membership, call 1-800-THE-CARD. Well, the so-called NBA experts will tell you that the Atlanta Hawks are the team that the Celtics fear most in the Eastern Conference, mainly because of their youth and talent and the devotion of the entire state of Georgia. As a matter of fact, Clark Booth went down to Atlanta recently and he visited some of the nearby historical monuments. He found out what we have suspected all along, that the New South still loves its past, but it yearns for a golden future. And a flashy, brilliant basketball team is the best way to make that statement to the world. Increasingly, cities yearn for pro champions. Flamboyant pro teams become logical symbols for new, assertive communities. Success as a Major League city has to be affirmed by a pro sports championship. Have-not NBA franchises and their fans dream of the day when they'll knock off the Celtics or the Lakers and become number one. The people of Atlanta believe that that day has finally arrived. This is a story about a lean and hungry basketball team, but you can't separate a club from its town nowadays nor a town from its regions. Much as the Knights once despoiled the colors of their princes' fiefdom, today's hired warriors represent much more than their own needs. And in this case, the turf we're talking about is all of the Southland with its revived sense of itself. We're talking about that boom town of Atlanta. And yes, we're talking about that particular state of mind called Georgia. Could it be that not so long ago, this was America or the America most of us knew? Do you seek a return to a time of idle fancies with nothing much to do and few interruptions in doing it? Then try Warm Springs in southwestern Georgia's Piney Valley region, where you can reckon yourself to be back in the 50s or even the 40s. Of course, if it was back then, you'd be swimming in the mainstream of history. Because it was then, in the 30s and 40s, President Franklin Roosevelt's little home away from home. And doesn't it say something about this place and that man that it was so? He treated his withered legs in Warm Springs thermal waters, making the place a symbol of hope for the handicapped. And it revealed the humanity of this complex patrician to degrees that have never been displayed in the presidency before or since. You entered this kitchen through the service entrance on the floor to probably the old fashioned icebox. No modern construction for him. Some 150,000 folks who remember all of that so well pay homage at this shrine every year. And so the president of the United States has passed away at Warm Springs, one of his favorite places in these United States. Warm Springs, as the rest of the nation, is now in deepest mourning. This sweetly scented so peaceful place is Georgia at its best. The sense of the South, that so charmed FDR, is something as soft as a spring breeze, as elusive as a sunbeam. But you do not have to look for it in picture books, for it is not gone. Far from it. Too long they lived the lie of the legend of the lost cause down here. But at some imprecise point around 1970, they came out of the closet, memorialized the folly of their past, wept a few lost tears for the good old boys of history, and moved on. Aided by the lightning bolt ascension of one of their own to the presidency, the South in general, Georgia in particular, and Atlanta above all, have been doing mighty fine. Progress with style and grace. Skip Peterson, who lived in the North, feels he has the good life in the South. He understands the historical accord that's been reached between North and South, and says it's predicated on this fairly simple demand. Don't tell us how to live and how to run our cities and counties and so on. Come on down, enjoy the weather, enjoy the park, enjoy Braves baseball and Hawks basketball. Come on down. Look, learn, enjoy. If you don't like something, fine. If you do, fine. Go back home. But just don't tell us how we should do this or do that. There is only one element left, one domain in which this booming region will confess it still lags, and that is the area of professional sports. Which leads us back to the Hawks. It is a nice team. The Hawks have the game's smallest player in Spud Webb, one of its truest artists in Dominique Wilkins, one of the more earnest and frenetic coaches in Mike Fratello, and indisputably the most eccentric owner in Ted Turner, aka Captain Outrageous. It's just nice to win a few games for a change, that's all. Winner's identity, is that it? Well, you and Boston have known what it's been for quite a while. Nice for Turner, nice for the Hawks, but above all, fitting for Atlanta. The siege of growth in this very corporate city is rampant and voracious. Skyscrapers, spring-like weeds, and highways are carved as casually as you might plant a spring crop. Already the crossroads of the South, Atlanta won't quit exhaling until it becomes what it perceives to be world class. It is admittedly an unqualified subservience to growth, but there has been little time for sentiment here about since the Union Army left the area in cinders. What's on the outside of the dome up there? Gold, that's exactly right, gold, real, live, actual, expensive gold. Perhaps it is a paradise for the Pabre Noux, but don't underestimate their ambition, and don't take lightly how much they feel they need a sporting champion to symbolically top off their rise. They have the Braves, they've had some fair moments, but now rank with the Dormats. They have the Falcons, perennial cannon fodder of the NFL. They head the Flames, who didn't blossom until they moved to Calgary. Occasional glorious moments have been known in college sport, but scandal has blighted such memories as the Herschel Walker epic at the University of Georgia. Will they ever forgive Professor Jan Kemp for blowing the whistle on the corruption in Georgia's athletic department? Probably not, but in their heart of hearts, folks here know she was right. At the professional level, there's never been a champ sprouted in the old Southland, and Atlanta, lusting to be first in everything down here, wants above all to be first at that. We're known as losers down here, we've never had a championship team in any sport except soccer, you know, and they don't play down there anymore. We've been sorely lacking as far as having a winning team, so it'd be neat. That's what people look forward to, everybody wants to be associated with the winner. I think the community here has really rallied behind the hawks. They're the only winner we've got in this town right now, and I think it's very important. Got the batter of the hawks, and you know they're gonna win, so everybody... And so you wonder what chance these hawks have. Wonder whether the fact they nipped at the Celtics' heels all season gives a true picture. Atlanta wins! Atlanta wins! It is a deep team. The gum-snapping, jersey-born coach deploys more players, runs them in and out more liberally than any coach in the league. Young, exuberant, bonded by Fratello's tireless supplications, they have quaint zeal and no grave ego problems. Ultimately, they rise or fall with the graces of the lilting Dominique, called in the popular cliche, the human highlight film. Dominique J! There are also Bush League features in Atlanta's act. Can you imagine the Celtics trotting out Playboy magazine's monthly playmates to strut and preen during timeouts, as the hawks did in their playoff opener with Indiana? It was hardly urbane, let alone world-class, but perhaps we should be charitable and describe it to their innocence. They are simply bursting with expectations down here. The Celtics are probably the most successful sports dynasty in any professional sport, and they've garnered up a lot of respect. Now, we've got the hawks, and they're coming on. Wouldn't it be nice? Wouldn't it be nice for the hawks to beat the Celtics and go to the finals? Wouldn't it happen right here? Wouldn't it be nice? You never know until it's over, right? Who would have ever thought that the Mets were going to beat the Red Sox? Everybody in Boston thought that. Surely he jests, but don't count on it. From Atlanta, this is Clark Booth reporting. It all started 68 years ago. What followed were the most extraordinary driving machines of their day. But none more extraordinary than this, the 168-horsepower BMW 325i, the latest expression of our seven-decade passion for driving. Test-drive the ultimate driving machine at your New England BMW dealers. Some people see the sunset as the end of the day. Others see it as the beginning of an evening. We, however, see it as the start of a new day in London, Hong Kong, and Tokyo. Expanding the horizons is capitalism at its best. And why you'll never look at a sunset quite the same again. Shearson-Lehman Brothers. Minds over money. Say you're John LaCardi. John, we need an answer now. With a fast decision to make. And your people are in three different cities. Just use your touchtone phone to talk with all of them at the same time. Are we going to junk the format? Who's he talking to? It's called AT&T Alliance Teleconferencing Service. From equipment to networking, from computers to communications. I want it. AT&T comes through. Set up your own conference call. 0700-456-1000. In 1977, the Nova looked like this and was brought to you by Chevrolet. In 1987, the Nova looks like this and is brought to you through a joint effort of General Motors and Toyota. New Chevy Nova. This new import has a turbo that can go from 0 to 60 in just 8.9 seconds. But even more amazing than how fast it goes is how little it goes fast. Four. Now you may not realize it, but the Celtics spend as much time in their locker room watching video tape of other teams as they do practice on the floor. But for the past week, they've been watching tapes of the Bucks and the Sixers because they weren't sure who they're going to play. But now they know that it's the Milwaukee Bucks. They've got to gear up for Milwaukee because the Bucks were embarrassed by the Celtics last year after being swept in four. This year, the Milwaukee Bucks are quicker. They are faster. But they also are smaller. But that did not seem to hurt them yesterday against the Philadelphia 76ers. But against the Celtics, it just might. What was absolutely chilling yesterday was the performance of Craig Hodges. Fourteen fourth quarter points that ignited a Milwaukee explosion. A 17 to 2 run that finished the season for the Philadelphia 76ers. Now you recall that a year ago, the Celtics swept Milwaukee in four. But this year, the Celtics split six games with Milwaukee during the regular season. They have Jack Sickma and they have John Lucas, and they believe they'll be playing well into June this year. Not to be lost yesterday in the Bucks win was the departure of the incomparable Julius Irving from pro basketball. Neither Roges or any other thesaurus has enough adjectives to suitably describe his impact on the game. Simply said, we will miss you, Doc. Goodbye. Bucks coach Don Nelson wasn't around to personally say goodbye to the doc. He was given the gate by Earl Strom in the first half. But Nelly's assistant, Del Harris, capably filled in. Under his guidance, the Bucks simply ran the Sixers right out of the Mecca. Now, if Kevin McHale does not play tomorrow night, then the Celtics defense will be severely tested against these new, swift Milwaukee Bucks. Game one tomorrow night at the Garden. Well, this locker in this corner of the locker room is always the most crowded after just about every game. The reason is quite obvious. Kevin McHale has been called everything from the human coat hanger to just plain unstoppable. Just a few days ago, I had a chance to sit down and talk to Kevin McHale about this remarkable season. About someone 15 years ago were to tell you that you were sitting here in this gym getting ready for your fourth, fifth final or whatever it is. And you're making this kind of money and enjoying this kind of life. What would you have told them? Well, I probably wouldn't have believed it at the beginning. I was 14 years old. I just said, who gives a **** shot more basketball? You know, that's all I do know is that I just played basketball. So, you know, I probably wouldn't even thought twice about it. I just would have gone out and took my ball and got on my driveway and said, who cares? You know, at that point, I had as much fun playing ball in my driveway as I had playing anywhere. And I still probably, looking back at that age, might have been the most enjoyable time I've ever had playing. Just a friend had stopped by and we played. Yeah. . . . . . Good morning. This is WSBK-TV in Boston, Massachusetts. WSBK-TV is owned and operated by New Boston Television, Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of the store or broadcasting company, and operates on UHF Channel 38, as authorized by the Federal Communications Commission. WSBK-TV studios and offices are located at 83 Leo Birmingham Parkway. The transmitter and antenna are located at 140 Cabot Street, Needham, Massachusetts. Now, our national anthem. for the land of the free and the home of the brave. Happy holidays from all of us at WSBK-TV 38, Boston. Warning, the following program depicts exercises which depending upon your physical condition may be hazardous to your health. You are therefore warned not to attempt any of these exercises without consulting your doctor. Even with such approval, each exercise should be done in moderation and should not be performed if tired or to the point of fatigue or pain. Do not over-exert yourself. This is the 20-minute workout, the exercise show that benefits the most important muscle in your body, your heart. Scientifically developed, the 20-minute workout offers the maximum aerobic benefit in the minimum amount of time. Begin slowly, working at your own pace, and watch the timer in the corner of your screen to set your goals for improvement. Be patient, like any exercise program, it takes a while to learn the routines. Just try to do a little more each day. Give yourself enough room to move, wear comfortable clothing, and jogging shoes. Whether you're a beginner or in great physical condition, the 20-minute workout is for you. Enjoy it. Part of the fun is learning the movements of aerobics. Bass is demonstrating an exercise called Feet Together, Arm Meets the Leg, an aerobic movement to really get your heart going. Keep your ankles pressed together as you jump, and let your arms move freely from the shoulders. To simplify the movement, take your feet apart and continue to let your arm meet the hip. Keep your stomach in tight, and remember to breathe out. The incoming oxygen will take care of itself. Hi, my name is Bess. Coming right up, the 20-minute workout, an investment that pays off with interest. Stay tuned. Hi, I'm Terry O'Reilly. On behalf of the entire Bruins family, I'd like to wish you and your family a happy and healthy holiday season. With the new year upon us, the Bruins are thankful for your support, and hope you'll join us at the Garden to continue the holiday cheer throughout the new year. Wishing you the best of the season, and promising you our best. The set up. What's the set up? The girls. Animals! If you don't get back on the ball, I'm gonna end up with your job, and I don't want it. You can't believe the things these people do. Well, so you be careful. Oh, the ghost! I don't care. Don't let anybody in. We're poking into a murder here, and the fact that I'm 30 years old doesn't seem to make much difference. Blue Grant goes to press on January 5th, weeknights at 5, on TV 38. The Bruins take to the road as they battle the devil, Friday at 7.30, right here on TV 38. We're feeling together, yes we can. We're feeling futures in our hands. Hi, I'm Ray Ward. This is my wife, Chris. This is Christopher, and this is Melissa. We'd like to wish you all a happy holidays. Ready to go. Stomach tight. Dropping your head forward, and five, six, seven. Take it front, and back, and front, and back. Four more. Three more. Two more. And looking right and left. Take it right, and left, and right, and left. Stomach tight. Come on. Four more. Three more. Two more. And take it side to side. Reach from side to side. Right and left. Come on, come on. Four more. Three more. Two more. Reach up for two counts, starting with the left. Take it left and right. Come on. Left and right. And single counts, reaching left and right. Come on. Seven. Stomach tight. Six and five. Four more. Three more. Four more. Two more. And back to side to side. Reach out and out. Come on. Stretch it. Right and out. Four more. Three more. Two more. And twisting it out. Come on. Come on. Twist it out. Waist up only. Hips are still. Stomach tight. Don't hold your breath on me. Four more. Three more. Arms cross your body, and throw your hands away. Come on. Press out, out, out. Four more. Three more. Two and flat back over in four, pressing down. Hands around your ankles. Pull your head through. Four head to the floor. Four more. Three more. And bounce your bottom down for four. Press up straight legs for four and take it down. And up. And down. Come on. And up. And one more set. Pressing down. And up. Single counts coming at you. Down and up. Come on. Seven. Six. And five. Four more. Three more. Right hands, your left foot. Four counts. Come with me. To the left. Three. And to the right. Four. Four. Three. Going right again. Four. Four. Three. Two. And other side. Four. Three. A single count. Take it to the left. And right. Seven. Stomach tight. Six. And five. You get that elbow to the floor. Come on now. Three more. Two more. And press behind your heel. Take it left. And right. And left. And right. Six. And five. Four more. Three more. Two. And lunging to the left. Pressing down. Stay there. Four. Three. And take it to your right. Hold on for eight. Six. Four. Three. Going left for four. Pressing four. Three. And to the right. For four. Three. No hands. A single count. Release. And left. And right. And left. And right. Come on. Don't you stop. Stay with me. And five. Hold on. Just four more. Three more. Two more. Opposite elbow finds the knee that is right. And left. And pressing over. Come on. Six. And five. Four more. Four more. Three more. Two more. And back to the lunge. Pressing left. And right. Come on. I know you can't do it. Stay with me. And pressing up. Four more. Three more. Two more. And reaching it up. Take it right. And left. And right. And left. Come on. Stomach tight. Really work it. Four more. Three more. Two more. And double each side. Take it right. For two. Come on. Left. For two. And right. And left. Four more. Three more. Two more. And back to single count. Reaching right. And up. Come on. Come on. And left. Six. And five. Don't stop breathing. Four more. Three more. Two. And one. Inhale. Up. Take it up. And out. And up. And out. Again. Up. And out. Last time. Take it up. Feet come together. Flat back over. And pressing it down. For two. And up. Stay with me now. Down. And up. Come on. Exhale. Last time. And go to single count. Come on. And up. And down. And up. Come on. And down. Four more. Three more. Two. On your hands and knees. And pressing it down. Over on your right hip. Legs come around in front. Take it back. Knees are together. Hands behind the head. Shoulders off the floor. Lifting five. Six. Stomach tight. Come with me. Take it up. And up. And up. Come on. Come on. Stomach tight. Shoulders off the floor. Hold on. Four more. Three more. Two more. And arms across your chest. Keep lifting. Up. And up. And up. Come on. I know you can do it. Come on. Get tough. Get strong. Stay with me. Come on. Four more. Three more. Two more. And hands outside the knees. Keep lifting. Up. And up. Four more. Three more. Two more. And now bicycle out. And bicycle. Come on. Come on. Just kick it out. I want you breathing. Don't hold your breath. Another set. Come with me. Eight. Hold on. Seven. You're strong. Six. And five. Don't you stop breathing. Now four more. Come on. Three. Two. Take it up on your elbows. And keep on pressing. And pressing. Four more. Three more. Two more. Up on your fingertips. Keep pressing it out. Let's go now. Eight more. Seven. Come on. Six. And five. You keep that stomach tight. Just four more. Three more. Two more. Legs are out. Knees come to the chest. And take it in. And in. Just one more set. Stay with me. Come on. Come on. One more. And one more. Put those feet together. Just four more. Three more. Two more. And one. Good. I want you to come up off the floor and start jogging in place. Left and right. Keep pressing it down. Four more. Hold on. Three more. Come on. Get tough with me. Two more. And cross your hands in front. Come on. Hold it on. Eight more. Six more. Four more. Three more. Two more. Take it front and back. Come on. Front and back. Four more. Three more. Two more. And just in back. Come on. Pull tight. Pull tight. Pull tight. Pull tight. Little tiny twist. Come on. And double. Right. Left. Right. Left. Good. Just let those arms cross your body. Stomach tight. Don't hold your breath. Keep breathing. Jogging it out. Regular aerobic exercise can substantially reduce the effects of stress. Keep jogging through our commercial break. Don't you stop. Hold on. Hold on. Saturday night at 6. Boy, it's gonna be busier than ladies' room on Nickel Beer Night. You've got a date with It's a Living. I got this hot date tonight. Got anything back there to help get her in the mood? Fun number of another guy. Next at 6.30, Vicki Lawrence in Mama's Family. The cat's out of the bag now. Oh, are we gonna have fun? Next at 7, Danny Thomas has one big family. Know what they call a father who doesn't make mistakes? What? A bachelor. Saturday nights here on TV 38. What are these days? Don't miss the fireworks this fall. It's the honeymooners like you've never seen them before. Join the celebration as dozens of outrageous, hilarious, all-new honeymooner episodes make their broadcast television premier. Weeknights and Saturdays at 10 and 10.30 on TV 38. Take me out of the ball game. Take me out of the crowd. Buy me some vials of crack, Jack. I don't care if I never come back. For kids today, it's a whole new ball game. You've got to watch for the signals. Crack is killing kids. Don't let it kill yours. Weeknights on TV 38 at the stroke of midnight, an hour of horror in the dead of night with Alfred Hitchcock Presents. First at midnight and again at 12.30. Put an end to your day with 60 minutes of murder. It's poison. Blackmail. Mystery and foul deeds. Better late than ever. Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Weeknights at 12 and 12.30 here on WSBK TV 38. Hope you didn't stop moving now. Come on. Left and right. Left and right. Stomach tight. Don't hold your breath. And arms come in and out. Let's go. Hold on. Stay with me now. Eight more. Six. Push those heels down. Four more. Three more. Two more. And arms cross up. Take them up. Come on. Four more. Three more. Two more. And arms cross in and up. And take them in. And up. And in. And up. Six. And five. Four more. Three more. Two more. And jumping jack. Let's go. Come on. Go. And up. And up. Come on. Get tough. Get strong. Don't you stop. Stomach tight. Come on. Come with me. Don't stop. Four more. Three more. Two more. Take a side to side. Come on. Take a right. Left. Right. And left. Four more. Three. Two. And lunging left and right. Let it go. Four more. Three more. Come on. Go with me. Two more. Just one arm. Take it up. And up. Don't stop now. Come on. Four more. Three more. Two. Take it to a punch. Let's go. Punch it out. Come on. Work it. Come on. And back to your lunge. Left and right. Four more. Three. Two. Double twist each side. Right. Left. Right. Left. Don't stop breathing now. Come on. And go to single count. Come on. Work hard. Get tough. Get strong. Don't stop. Hold on. Four more. Three more. Two. And legs are left and right. Come on. Take it out. Four more. Three more. Two more. And arm meets the leg. Come on. Come on. Come on. Four more. Three more. Two more. Feet together. Right and left. Come on. Ankle together. Knees together. Thighs together. Press now. Come on. I know you can do this. Don't stop. Out feet apart. Stay with me. Just four more. Hold on. Three more. Stay strong. Two more. And back to jumping jack. Come on. Go. Hold on. Arms crossing in and up. Come on. In. Up. In. Up. Three more. Two more. Same arms jogging it out and taking left and right. Two more now. Punch it to the sky. Come on. Go. Go. Tapping strong. Don't stop. Exhale. Come on. Don't forget to breathe. Take it front. Let those arms go left arm up. Come on. Press it side to side. Don't stop. Come on. Don't stop. Double each side. And back to singles. Hold on now. Four more. Three more. Two more. Lifting left and right and taking left, right and left and right. Four more. Really breathe it up. Three more. Two more. One. Inhale up. Come on. Take it up. And out. And up. And out. Hold on. Two more. And one. Left arm coming over and take it over. Flat back. Chin up. Try not to bounce. Relax into the knee. Drop and dance. And through the center. Hold on. That's the knee. Three. And two. Left and take left. And flat back. Come on. I know you're breathing. Come on. Take that right arm over. And slowly lift it up. Flat back over. Walk your hands forward. And slowly lift those heels. Pressing up and up. Come on. Press them up and up. Don't stop. Don't stop. Come on. Take it up. Hold on now. Four more. Three more. Two more. And heels to the floor. Press it through. Nice and strong. Hold on. Keep breathing. Just four more. Three more. Two more. And feet come together and pressing right. Four two. And left. Four two. And right. And left. Four more. Three more. Two more. Single count. And pressing right. And left. And right. And left. Don't you stop. Come on. Stay with me. And back. Hold it now. Just four more. Three more. Two more. And heels to the floor. Pressing down. Flat back. Stretching out. Come on. Six. And five. Walk those hands back to the feet. Four more. Three more. Rolling it up. Two more. And one. And inhale up. Come on. Take it up. And out. And up. And out. Two more. Come on. Deep inhale up. And out. And left time up. And out. Left arm over. Nice and slow. And back. And right. And back. Stretch that rib cage all the way through. Four more. Come on. Three more. Work it out. Two more. And one. And lifting up. And out. Again. Up. And out. Head circle. Take it all the way around. All the way. And again. And reverse. And again. Dropping your head forward. Take it front. And back. And front. And left. Come on. Right ear to your shoulder. Press it right. And left. And right. And left. Four more. Three more. Aerobic benefit number three. Better muscle tone. Last one. And inhale up. Come on. Take it up. And out. And up. Hi. This is my wife Debbie. This is my son Jared. And my daughter Clydeen. We're the Middleton family. Happy holidays to everybody. Happy holidays. Hi. I'm Michael. I am Linda. And as we say in Swedish, god jul gott nyt år. We are Frank and Maria Simonetti wishing you the happiest of holidays and a happy new year. The ruins take to the road as they battle the devil. Friday at 730 right here on TV 38. There's a special place in every town, in every city, a place where the hungry are fed, the cold find shelter, where young people come for guidance and neighbors gather for prayer. It's the hub of an incredible network of schools, hospitals, shelters, nursing homes, community centers, parishes, the place, the people. It's the church, the Catholic Church of the Archdiocese of Boston. Weeknights at 7 and 11, laughter is always welcome on MASH. Press humor on MASH. Weeknights at 7 and 11, here on TV 38. That's it for today. I hope you've worked as hard as you could. Don't be discouraged if you couldn't complete the entire workout. I want you to add 20 minutes to your life every day. You stay fit. See you next time. While in Toronto, the cast and crew stayed at the Sheraton Center Hotel. The Sheraton Center Hotel. TV 38, a part of your holidays. In all the galaxies, there is only one ultimate power of good. Bulldron, a legendary champion from ancient time. Bulldron, called back to save mankind. Get ready for a thrilling space adventure as young galactic space explorers rediscover the secret of Bulldron. Come, join the Bulldron Force. Bulldron, defender of the universe. Weekday mornings at 630, right here on TV 38. Bert Reynolds, a con man in WW and the Dixie Dance Games tonight at 8. From days of long ago, from uncharted regions of the universe, comes a legend. The legend of Voltron, defender of the universe. A mighty robot, loved by good, feared by evil. As Voltron's legend grew, peace settled across the galaxy. On planet Earth, a galaxy alliance was formed. Together with the good planets of the solar system, they maintained peace throughout the universe. Until a new horrible menace threatened the galaxy. Voltron was needed once more. Here is the story of the super force of space explorers. Entrusted by the alliance with the ancient secret of how to assemble. Voltron, defender of the universe. Two planets side by side. One of the most beautiful sites in the universe. Bring the ship in closer. Beautiful and so mysterious. The blue one looks amazingly like Earth. The orange one is like the moon, except it's huge. We sent out signals, but no response. Maybe they didn't want to answer. Look, what's that? Commander, there's no response from those burning ships. Looks like the strangest thing I've ever seen. Voltron force, check it out. Something's definitely weird about those ships. Cliff, you take the left side. Crick, you take the right. I'll circle around and check up front. Great, Jim. Voltron will be back after these messages. When freedom is threatened, the call goes out. Get me Rambo. Now it's my turn. Sorry, mom, but I got a plane to catch. Rambo. New adventures. New excitement. New every weekday. Rambo. Weekday afternoons at 4 right here on TV 30. Here's a chance. Brett's hockey. The greatest point scorer in hockey history. NHL most valuable player seven times in seven seasons. He's Wayne Gretzky, and if you play hockey, you want to play it his way. Now on videocassette comes Wayne Gretzky, Hockey My Way. Kids can work on this drill. In Hockey My Way, Wayne reveals his special training techniques and talks about the skills that have helped make him the greatest international star in sports today. Your feet are like another pair of hands, and if you know how to use them, you're a better hockey player. From basic drills, crossovers along the blue line, to the subtleties of team play, Wayne Gretzky, Hockey My Way, teaches good hockey to players and coaches alike. To order, phone 1-800-523-5503. Just $39.95 plus $3.50 for handling and shipping. Have your American Express MasterCard or Visa number ready. That's 1-800-523-5503. Makes a great Christmas gift. Set a course for Earth. The Gobot invasion continues. Prepare to pop with us. Every weekday, the forces collide. Gobot renegades. Gobot guarding. Leader 1. Psycho. Turbo. Alright! Crusher. Copter. Shooter. The challenge of the Gobot. Weekday mornings at 7 here on PD38. And now, back to Voltron, Defender of the Universe. Hey, they're taking off! Let's go after them! Seth, forget that now. I want you to check out those planets. Okay, no problem. We're on our way. We may need some additional firepower. Air team, form stratofighter! Land and sea teams, stand by for assembling. Land team, set to go. Sea team, ready! Land team, form turbo terrain fighter! Sea team, ignite nuclear power thrusters and form aqua fighter! Time to explore this new world. Land team, take the surface. Sea team, take the ocean. Air team will cover you in case of trouble. Watch out for that ghost fleet. Okay. These specimens from that planet's soil are nothing like Earth's. These samples from the ocean show absolutely no similarity to any other water in the universe. So, Dr. Page, what does it all mean? That planet is a strange place. It could be very dangerous. Cliff, the land is so still it's nerve-racking. Yeah, I know what you mean. This place might look like Earth, but it's quiet as a graveyard. Explore a land team reporting the surface is deserted. Crick, there's not a single fish here. No life at all. If you were going to go fishing, you wouldn't want to come here, would you? With you? Explore a sea team reporting nothing here. Air team reporting, it's a beautiful planet like Earth. It's got lots of trees. I'm flying over a lake now. Pretty harbor. Perfect for landing. That's what's weird around here. Everything's too perfect and much too quiet. I'm picking up strange noises. Maybe it's those ghost ships. Sparks, run a check. Captain, I don't have to check. There they are again. They only seem to fly over water. Maybe they're protecting something and don't want us to land. Jeff, we've spotted the ghost fleet again. We're going to land in that lake harbor and investigate. Okay. Bring her down. What gives that ghost fleet's disappeared again? Commander Hazard, the plan is working perfectly. The explorer will be destroyed. Too bad for them. We discovered the secret of the lake first. This is Captain Rogar of the attack fleet. When they find out what's in that water, it'll be too late. Rogar, contact Mongo. You must make sure that alliance ship does not escape. No matter what, keep it in the water. Yes, sir. Anybody bring a surfboard? Dr. Page has some samples of lake water. I wonder what he'll find. We'll know soon. Why can't anything live in this planet's water? It could be polluted. We'll see. Maybe Dr. Page can tell us. We've found micro-water samples from all over the galaxies, but this is the strangest case I've ever encountered. It looks like Earth, but it's a dying planet. Why? It's something in the water, and I'd better find out what it is while there's still time. I'm a water bird, and I have the feeling we shouldn't be sitting on this lake like a bump in a log. Yeah, what if that ghost fleet comes to life? Everyone knows the drool empire wants to conquer the universe. I'll bet they're at the bottom of this. The drool empire may be behind this, but they're not at the bottom of it. There's nothing at the bottom of the lake, or we would have found it. Hmm? Hey, team, look. They've got the automatic subs in the water collecting more samples. Automatic subs? Don't they think we're capable, or do they think it's too dangerous for us? Hey, look who's back! We got company! It's the ghost fleet! What should we do? If they don't bother us, don't bother them. But who are they? By the time they figure out the ghost fleet belongs to us, the damage would have been done in just another few minutes, and the Explorer will be a useless hulk. Now, take the attack ships down and hold them there. Yes, Mongo! It's a drool attack squad! This is Commander Hawkins. Take the Explorer up quickly. Take her up, take her up! Uh-oh. We'll be trapped! Take her out to sea! There's the ghost fleet! Move! Voltron will be back after these messages. Evil threatens the universe as plants turn into creatures that attack mankind. Only one force can stop them, the Lightning League. Led by the magic of an ancient ring and a brave boy's courage, it's the monster minds against Jace and his friends. Be sure to watch when lightning strikes. Jace, weekday afternoons at 2.30 right here on TV 38. He is the ruler of the evil horde. You have an objection? She is the leader of the Great Rebellion. I am She-Ra! Join them right here each weekday as She-Ra and her friends strive to free Eteria from the evil forces of Hordak. She-Ra, Princess of Power, is here. She-Ra this afternoon at 3 right here on TV 38. They found the perfect place to take the whole family to the New England Aquarium. Oh, Daddy, you have great surprises! Come on, around here, there's sharks! Look at you! Nino, look at Daddy! How does that feel, Karen? Hey, look how cool they are! What a giant turtle! I can't look, I can't look! Look at the mirrors! Hey, Mom, the dolphin shark! The New England Aquarium, where families get together. Rocket into the new frontier of adventure. Into worlds of unknown dangers ride the Galaxy Rangers. Ride with them. The Galaxy Rangers now at 7.30 weekday mornings here on TV 38. And now, back to Voltron, Defender of the Universe. The drool really put one over on us this time. We fell right into their trap. And now we must escape. If we send out the Voltron force, the enemy will attack from above. If they don't go, that ghost fleet will finish us for sure. They can't escape from me now! They're trapped! Blast them! Captain, we're pinned down and losing power! Battle alert, hold your position and fight! This is why they wanted to keep us in the water. Doctor, what are those horrible things? These creatures destroyed two worlds. They are deadly micro worms. They'll eat anything, even steel. Commander. Are you telling me those micro worms can eat the explorers' hull and turn us into a ghost ship? And after they get done eating the explorer, they'll have us for dessert. Captain, if we're going to do something, we better do it now. The enemy's closing in. Newly, I only have one choice, the Voltron force. It's our only chance. You don't need my permission, sir. You're the commander. It just might work. The Voltron force can get their attention, then we'll attack. We hope. And if they're fast, they'll be able to form Voltron. The enemy units are combining. For Voltron? We must not allow them to form Voltron, sire. This time their giant robot's too late. The micro worms are eating away at the hull of their command ship. Soon the command ship will sink and there will be nothing to defend. And if he should win, the mighty Voltron will have no place to go back to. He's finished. What are your orders, sir? No matter what it takes, keep them in the water. The explorer is very strong. They're trying to break through the barrier. Stop them. In the water. Use the beast. A giant electro beast. Lift off and fire at the same time. We must not let them pass it off. Quick, fire. We must master a short circuit in all systems. We're going back down. The explorer's in trouble. Use Voltron. Let's go Voltron. Form feet and legs. Form arms and torso. And I'll form the head. It's escaping. Let's go get him. Voltron's left the explorer unprotected. Now's our chance. Destroy the explorer. Blow it up. Watch out. Form blazing sword. Hold on. Oh, man. Voltron, can you take care of those enemy attackers? Go Voltron. Come on you fool. Let's get out of here. I am not afraid. I will not run. I am loyal to the drool empire to the very end. Voltron will be back after these messages. TV 38, a part of your holidays. Watch out. Here comes Scooby Doo. It spills, thrills and chills. With your favorite canine sloop. A roller coaster half hour of fun. Watch out. It's Scooby Doo. Weekdays on this channel. Weekday mornings at 8.30 right here on TV 38. Share a little bit of yourself without even knowing. When you share a little bit of yourself you'll find good feelings growing. The GoBot Invasion continues. Every weekday the forces collide. Leader One. Weekday mornings at 7 here on TV 38. And now, back to Voltron, defender of the universe. The job you've done has saved us once again, but we're not out of danger yet. We still have to make repairs on the Explorer from the damage done by those micro worms. Attention all members of the crew and especially those of the Voltron force. The mission of the Explorer is to locate friendly worlds and bring peace to the universe. Our job is not easy because there are those who challenge our efforts for justice and freedom. Every one of you made the decision to join us. I just want you to know it's good to have you aboard. Now let's get busy and clean out those pesky worms. The GoBot Invasion continues. The GoBot Invasion continues. The GoBot Invasion continues. For some free tips on taking care of soil in your backyard, just write to Eddie and Ralph. National Wildlife Federation Washington DC 20036. Happy Holidays from all of us at WSBK TV 38 Boston. The GoBots! The GoBots! The GoBots! Hey, Edgar! We finally found you! Scooter, Smallfoot, we thought you'd never get here. We've got to get moving! Forget it, AJ, we're too late. He did it, Stock Car fans! Doby Danger in his custom supercar has just jumped 12 garbage trucks! I can't see anything from down here. Okay, let's go find our seats. Where's Leader One and Turbo? They're running late. Oh yeah, they're putting the power suits through some tests. Now for the big event of today's rally, the AAA Stock Car Race! Uh-oh, my scanners are picking up remodeled frequencies. They're very close by! Ready Gates? Where? Down there! Are you sure? Hey! Flytrap! It's Bookie Man! The scheduled novelty act! Let's give them a few driving tips! Hey, pal, this ain't a demolition, Derby! That's what you think! I see you've got a very pressing engagement. Move! The Guardians are in the stands! Right! They're coming right at us! Oh, radio Leader One! No time, Scoot! We've got to stop them ourselves! Incredible! Now a pickup and motor scooter are in the race! Now that's Heather David! Out of our way, Guardians! We want the boy and girl! You better back off before you get us mad! Don't make me laugh! Hey, what's going on? I don't like the looks of this! Come along, kiddies! Let's go for a ride! You're asking for trouble, Crusher! Are you threatening me with a loaded soldering gun? I want you! I want you! Stop it! I hate being tickled! That's fancy footwork, small foot! Big bro buggy man! Get away from me, kid! You'll bother me! Oh, no! I'm just short of my Homo Projection Unit! Having an identity crisis? Buggy Man can fix it for you! Permanently! We've got to reach Nathaniel, too! New form? Too late! Flytrap's already got them! Get on the hold, Scooter! Now, pull hard! Alright! Good thinking, Scooter! Uh, small foot really did all the work. We're not wasting any more time on you ruts! Blast them! No! I can't walk! Challenge of the Gobots will return after these messages. Er, she's chocolate fun, one of the all-time greats! You're milk chocolate, delicious and smooth! Hershey's is a fun one! Er, she's chocolate fun, one of the all-time greats! Excuse me. What the? It's my evil twin brother, Black Dragon! Now we'll see whose ninja skills are sharper, White Dragon! Use your hook, Cat! Fly aboard! Goodbye, White Dragon, my ninja twin! Gotcha, Black Dragon! White Dragon and Cat, figures and helicopter, reach Seoul separately. Whoa! Feels like the wind's picking up soon! Not yet! And it's gonna pick up you and me! Time for a powerful Cheerios breakfast! A balanced breakfast like this one! You can't go with Cheerios, energy-os that help you run! You can't go the high-high clouds, run! Try my lunch, run with Cheerios! You'll feed your Cheerios! A Cheerios breakfast! He is the ruler of the evil horde. You have an objection? She is the leader of the great rebellion. I am She-Ra! Join them right here, each weekday, as She-Ra and her friends strive to free Etheria from the evil forces of Hordak. She-Ra, Princess of Power, is here! She-Ra, this afternoon at 3, right here on TV 38. Now, back to the challenge of the Gobots. Can we crash your little party, Crasher? Yeah, we brought the fireworks! Oh, Bungie Man! Come out, come out, wherever you are! I just love sandblast! Two against one? Doesn't look good for you, Leowan. Unless one has a power suit with Mega Blasters. Had enough, Crasher? Yes! I'm getting bored with this! Scoot, you're hit! I can take care of myself, Smallfoot. Okay, okay! I guess I could use a systems checkup. Stop squirming, Scooter! I've got to astrobeam you back to Gobotron, Scooter. Maybe the Professor can fix your holoprejector. I certainly can't. Hmm, maybe that's not all he can do for me. But it was a perfect plan, Cygil. If we grabbed the two kids, I thought... You thought? All you did was lose to the Guardians again! The plan almost worked, and you're an almost pathetic flytrap! But they used their power suits against us! They've had that advantage long enough! We're going to steal those power suits and give the Guardians a taste of their own medicine! Ah-ha-ha! What you ask is out of the question! You realize that to install a blaster unit, I have to take something out? But my holoprejector is wrapped anyway! Take it out! All right, Scooter. Out with your holoprejector and in with your blaster unit. We'll have to lure the Guardians away from their command center. Screwhead, you will attack Unicom's Hawaiian satellite tracking station. Here! Ha-ha-ha-ha! No problem! Bad boy, Scoot, you stand by to strike the glacier installation in Alaska. As you command, Cygil! Buy me enough time, Renegades, and the Guardian power suits swear be ours! Hang up, Scooter! That's better. Your blasters have a 60-day warranty, and don't use them against any force fields for about... But, Professor, I don't feel any different. Fire, Scooter! Did I do that? I must adjust your setting. You blasted your old holoprejector to atoms. Again, avoid force fields for a month, and then read the instructions manuals if you have any questions. Oh, I can't wait to meet those Renegades again! But Commander Kodo, why monitor all of Unicom's satellites in the same place? Why monitor all of Unicom's satellites from this one station? Well, we can bounce off the Van Allen radiation belt from here, and we've never had such seismic activity. What is it, Commander? Earthquake! Punch me up some visuals, mister. There, Commander, the mountain! Impossible! There are no volcanoes on this island! Aloha, Unicom! Mind if I borrow one of your satellite dishes? Psycho wants me to fall in a hole! Ha ha ha! You get it? Ha ha ha! Quick! Where's your communications room, Commander? Uh, hurry up, will you, A.J.? Don't be so impatient! My trigger finger's starting to itch. Hey, Psycho! Question! You're talking to me? Cry, you Renegades snake! Cough, cough, cough! Yeah, that'll show those vermin! You'd better look again, Scooter! Huh? Uh, shouldn't you be working on that power surge problem, Scoot? After I get some more target practice. Nick, A.J., report back to the command center. You too, Scooter, immediately! Ooh, he sounds mad. Uh, I really was trying to fix that power surge problem, Leader One. Quiet, Scooter! Repeat your last message, Matt. We can't hold Screwhead off any longer. Screwhead? We're on our way, Matt. Renegades! I volunteer to go! Oh, me too, Leader One! Sorry, I need you both to guard the command center. But I can really help this time! I've got splasters and everything! Smallfoot, you keep him from getting blast happy. Oh, I don't need her to babysit me! If Matt's in trouble, A.J. and I want to go with you. Okay, you guys can come. Scooter? Yes, Leader One? Fix that power surge, will ya? Oh, what are you looking at? Come, Pressure Scoop! Our parachutes are waiting! Leader One made a big mistake not fixing me with him. Renegades! Renegades? Quick! Ratee on Leader One and Turbo for help! Don't bother. Those Turbo Makers need to be totaled lessened. Don't be ridiculous! We can't take them on by ourselves. Did I say we? I'll handle it by myself this time, Smallfoot. Those morons left the command center unguarded! We've outsmarted them this time, Psychil! Yeah! Not so fast, Insect Whip! Don't move! You're my prisoners! Who's kidding who? Where are the power suites, Pip-Sweep? I warned you! Scooter, are you all right? I'll move Smallfoot. Let go of me! Find the power suit, Scott. Yes, Psychil. His wild blasts destroyed the communications consoles, Psychil! Thank you, Little Gobot. It was an accident! Who cares? Now you're cut off from the outside world, and after we have the power suits, you guardians are all through. Throw them into a detention cell, Pressure. Oh, what have I done? What have I done? Challenge of the Gobots will return after these messages. Rocket into the new frontier of adventure. Into worlds of unknown dangers ride the Galaxy Rangers. Ride with them. The Galaxy Rangers now at 730 weekday mornings here on TV 38. Rocky Road Cereal presents, live at the Cereal Bowl. It's the Rocky Road Breakfast Band. Chocolatey chocolatey puff, it makes my heart sing. And vanilla puff, it's such a tasty thing. And I've got something really special for you. It's got a chocolatey nutty coat and marshmallow too. It's Rocky Road Cereal, a rocking part of this complete breakfast. Way to get up to Rocky Road and show them the thing. Rocky Road, Rocky Road, Rocky Road. You the man, Wonder Woman, Batman and Robin. Buck the man, Black Vulcan, and the ride, Apache Chief, El Dorado. Together they form the world's greatest force, dedicated to truth, peace and justice for all mankind. These are the Superfans. Weekday mornings today, right here on TV 38. Share a little bit of yourself without even knowing. When you share a little bit of yourself, you'll find good feelings growing. You get a glow that feels so all inside. You share yourself and your heart opens wide. When you share a little bit of yourself, you'll find good feelings growing. From the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to Mormons. Now, back to the challenge of the GoBots. Give up, Turbo! Never! Sorry, Sprewhead. No drilling allowed. Oh, come on up, you galvanized gopher! Don't worry, Turbo. What goes down must come up. Psykill the Sprewhead. How goes the battle? I got him pinned down. I found the power suits, Psykill. Excellent! But they're protected behind an energy grid. I can't break through. Dread! Psykill the Sprewhead. We need more time. Break off your attack. That boy a cop tour will take over for a while. Hey! Why'd he quit like that? I don't think this was an ordinary attack, Turbo. We've just received word from the Unicom Glacier installation in Alaska. They're under Renegade attack. That's really clever, Psykill. Aw, do you know what's going on, Leader One? Yeah, just a hunch. Let's mop up in Alaska and prepare for the real showdown with Psykill. If the Renegades get our power suits, they'll be twice as hard to fight. The power surge problem. Maybe I can use it to my advantage. My blasters! I thought I'd be the last! Now, release the power suits, Guardian, or I'll rearrange your circuits. I-I don't know how. Don't toy with me, Smallfoot. Look, Psykill, there's an energy flux. The power grid is fading. He must have knocked out the entire power system. Ah! The power suits are ours! We're now ready to engage Leader One and his Guardian rebel. Psykill calling Bad Boy and Kaptur. Can't keep the force field up. Indefinitely turbo. Finish it off, Leader One. Let's get this over with. So, Leader One, this is how it all ends. Bad Boy and Kaptur, we are victorious! Stop the attack! Psykill, please let me finish him off. Negative, I want to dispose of them myself. Major Spectre Throster, you must get fitted with your new power suits. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, this is getting very discouraging. Not at all, Turbo. It's ingenious. Leader One calling Command Center. Come in, Scooter. Scooter? Smallfoot! Ah, just as I feared. While we've been away, Psykills moved in on the Command Center. Time to go! Let's see how these power suits fit, shall we? I've got to do something. A stray shot might hit Smallfoot if I only still have my holo projector. That's it. I can't change my appearance, but I can still mimic those voices. Turbo, guard the loading bay. Partians, he's already impossible! Really, Smallfoot? Leader One, how do you... ...show? Ow! Come on! Out of them! They're gaining on us, Scooter! Chopper, coming up! Get off me, imbecile! Sorry! The books are like the Suncar Rally! Uh-oh! Quick, Smallfoot! In here! Maybe I can fool her, too! Grasher? Psykill? Come here at once, I need your help. I'm coming, Psykill! Enough! A guardian trick! We're gonna make it, Smallfoot! Back the other way! Grasher! Going somewhere? I'm gonna blast you two pests into gold bits! Hold it right there, Psykill! Give it up! I'm not going to fall for that trick again! Leader One? Turbo? It's really you! Yeah, we missed you too, Psykill. But I won't miss you now! Not thinking of leaving, are you fellas? I had the power suits in my hand! In my hand! Should we go after them, Leader One? No, no, let them go. We'll get them next time. Um... I'd like to astrobeam up to Gorbatron. I left something very important up there. I'm going to go after them, Leader One. No, no, let them go. We'll get them next time. No, no, let them go. We'll get them next time. I'd like to astrobeam up to Gorbatron. I left something very important up there. Check the launch window. Power's back up, Leader One. Stand by for liftoff. Anybody here order a pepperoni pizza with anchovies? Hey! How'd you get on board, buster? Oh, what's the matter, Turbo? Don't you like anchovies? Scooter, you nut! You got your holo-projector back! The old Scooter makes a much better gardener. Yes, I think we all agree. Now the old Scooter still needs to repair the power surge problem. Um... give me a hand, Spellford? Well, if you really want me to, Scoot. The name is Scooter, but you can call me Scoot. Ha-ha-ha! Challenge of the Gobots will return after these messages. Uh-oh, kids, cook up some fun. Here come the Spaghetti-os! Uh-oh! And everybody's up. Uh-oh! For those fun-to-eat Spaghetti-os. You forgot. One tasty little oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Oh, gosh, you sure know your ohs. Uh-oh! Spaghetti-os! SunKist has been searching and searching for new kinds of fun fruit trees, funny enough to grow new kinds of fun fruits. Whoa! Whoa! And we finally found them. Now there's Tropical Fruit, Berry Bunch, and Fantastic Fruit Bunch. Every chewy one is real fruity fun. New SunKist Fun Fruits. Travel in the strange and magical worlds of adventure and excitement. Jace and the Lightning League. Battle the evil of the Monster Mind. Lightning Strikes! Don't miss Jace and the Wheeled Warriors. Jace, this afternoon at 2.30, right here on TV30. Since the beginning of time, not one drop of water has been added to the Earth's supply. Yet every day we use more and more. Water. Our most precious and wasted resource. A water conservation message from the Metropolitan District Commission. Now back to the challenge of the GoBots. A message from your Shriners hospitals. You know kids, the kitchen ain't a playground. There's a lot of danger hiding in here. That dangling cord can be a disaster. Especially if they grab hold and yank me. My cord should be up! Hey, you said it. Keep dangling cords out of reach. Delicious cookies can be a tempting treat. I should be over there. Keep the goodies away from heat so kids don't get more than a treat. There's a lot of things in here that can burn you. Oh, me? By itself it's harmless, but filled with scalding hot water. I just wait for a child to grab my handle then. Uh oh, a really bad burn. If you ever stay out of hot water, keep those pot handles tightened in. Share a little bit of yourself without even knowing. When you share a little bit of yourself you'll find good feelings growing. Share something no one else can, yourself. From the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the Mormons. Happy Holidays from all of us at WSBK TV 38, Boston. In 2086, two peaceful aliens journeyed to Earth seeking our help. In return, they gave us the plans for our first hyperdrive, allowing mankind to open the doors to the stars. We have assembled a team of unique individuals to protect Earth and our allies. Courageous pioneers committed to the highest ideals of justice and dedicated to preserving law and order across the new frontier. These are the Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers. Angels these worlds are fun, no danger they lie. That Galaxy Rangers will make you shine, no that's no story. Oh, did you say? Ready to prove it again? I can't wait to get to the S'mores Crunch cereal. I think we're being watched. Oh no! Where's the S'mores-er? On the prowl, pals. We're hungry for S'mores Crunch, so is he! Then it's a perfect time to... Wave my wand for swirls of chocolatey grains and marshmallows galore. It's S'mores Crunch! An enchanted part of this nutritious breakfast. Can I have S'mores? S'mores Crunch cereal. It's S'mores fun for breakfast. Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman and Robin, Aquaman, Black Vulcan, and Mariah, the patchy chief, El Dorado. Together they form the world's greatest force, dedicated to truth, peace and justice for all mankind. These are the Supermen. Weekday mornings at 8, right here on TV 38. A message from your Shriners hospitals. I'll spring the old bedroom quiz on them. Daddy, what are you doing here? Well, it's quiz time. First question. How do you burn proof a bedroom? One way's that gadget up there. Aha, a smoke detector. Every home should have at least one. But just having one isn't enough. Kids usually know the sound a smoke detector makes. And what does that sound mean, kids? It means get out of the house. And fast! How? It's skate ritz. Right, the whole family should map out a few of the boys to get out of the house if there's a fire. A meeting place is most important so everyone knows everyone else is okay. True or false? Under the bed is the best place to go during a fire. That's false. You should never hide under the bed. What about the closet? That's a definite no-no too, Daffy. Make sure your family gets an A on my burn prevention quiz, okay? I've never seen them like this, Goose. Something is driving them crazy. So why didn't you ask them what it is? I did! They said they only want to talk to you. Figures. Winter. What is it? Easy, guys. The goose is here. No question about it. The dolphins have heard a telepathic distress call. Have you deciphered the message? My brothers, the darkness encircles us. Help us. What? We traced the signal to an unexplored planet in the empty zone. The planetoid is water-based. There appears to be only one landmass. Alright, prepare a survey mission. Take the dolphins. Survey nose pod in position. Prepare to load flying sub. Rover coming on cargo pod. I've modified your headsets to help you pinpoint life readings. Bye, Tube. Bye-bye, Byway. Good luck, team. Okay, guys. Road trip. All tweakers falling. Firefly here. Pathfinder here. Life line present. Pathfinder is ready. What about me, Doc? Sorry, Pixel, but you still have too many bugs in your programming. Nico, what have you got? No traces of high-tech energy sources. I can't pinpoint it. Something seems to be diffusing the signal. I suggest two teams. One checks out the land, the other checks the ocean. Alright, Goose, you and Nico take the wet side. Doc and I have the dry side. Check this out. Toxic fumes over the landmass. Nice choice, Zack. Flying sub launch codes green. Wow, this place is a mess. You got your carbon monoxide, carbon dioxide, nitrogen dioxide. All the signs of basic hydrocarbon poisoning. But there's no industry on this entire planet. Here, right. 30 degrees. I see it. Large structural masses. So much for your low-tech theory. Looks inactive. Any life form readings? Negatory. Pollutants are blocking the sensor. Let's check it out. But first, break out the armor-plated tuxedos. Deserted factory of some kind. Who or what could possibly live here? Deserted, huh? Nico, I sense something nearby. Check it out. There are life readings down here, Goose. I think they're scared of the sub. Cut engines, Alma. I'm taking the life raft out. Follow me at a safe distance. Right. Come on, they're getting away! Go ahead, Winter. I'll be right there. Why not run with us? Another time. Goose, I'm detecting a power source. Can't lock it in. Boost the direction finder. I'm sorry, Goose. Too much magnetic interference. Take us up. Nico, I'm scouting out the area. Roger. Continuing video survey. What? Goose, unidentified craft sighted. Ah! Alien Spice! Flywheel! Fire torpedoes! Goose, torpedo approaching! Hang on, Alma. Right. Fire, Alma. Nico? Okay, thanks. We spotted the alien, Summer! Winter? Winter! Goose, what is it? They found the sub. I'm going in. Hey! Don't shoot! Don't shoot! Goose! Help! Hang on, guys. Help! Help! Nobody messes with my dolphins. Help! Some kind of high-strength super-metal alloy. Get us out of here, Dalton! Nico, they've got the dolphins. They're headed for an underwater tubeway. Follow them. I'll get Alma. Lousy dolphin rustlers. This polluted air is a byproduct of heavy industry. But what's being manufactured and where? Why don't we ask him? It's heading into the bottom. You okay, Doc? I'm okay, but it's not. Let's get it into the rover. It's alive, but look at these scans. I can't believe these brainwave readings. Its biosystem's been contaminated. It's been driven berserk by the chemical pollution. I'm surprised it's made it this far. It should recover now. Come on, let's find the source of this garbage. I'm with you. Visibility almost zero. Readings intensifying. We're close. We're here. There it is. That's your pollution source. That's where it's from. Shall we ring the doorbell or send a telegram? Aliens, you are trespassing on private property! Leave at once! We are the Galaxy Rangers, and you're under arrest for violations of the Interplanetary Clean Air and Water Statute. This planet is ours now! We know our rights! Go find your own factory! Into the rover. Good idea. The Galaxy Rangers will return after these messages. Legions of Power! Build for Battle! Legions of Power, motorized forces of good and evil you build for battle, each sold separately. Your fate is sealed, Jeffron. The Tech Dynasty has no mercy. The Bells just beginning war, Taxi Star Legion, surrender to no one! Legions of Power! Build for Battle! Legions of Power, new from Tonka. Rambo! In Rambo's world, this guy's trouble. Savage's top sergeant, one mean tough bike machine with a nasty battle action bazooka. Think you're bad havoc? Turbo! Rambo's one man army with a battle action night vision helmet. What's the matter, Havoc? You're to the dark! Havoc and Turbo, each sold separately with their battle action accessories from Kalito. Whoa! Feels like the wind's picking up soon. Yeah, it's gonna pick up you and me! Time for a powerful Cheerios breakfast. A balanced breakfast like this one. You can't go with Cheerios, energyos that help you grow. You can't go with Havoc, Power, or Turbo. Try my luck strong with Cheerios. You'll feel those Cheerios. A Cheerios breakfast. Hey, hey, Fat Albert every day. With all the Cosby kids fun, including brand new adventures. Hey, hey, hey, shoot one my way. Boy, this is fun. And full of surprises. Man, that was great. And the great news is that you can tune in Fat Albert Monday through Friday and catch up on what the Cosby kids are up to. Bill Cosby's The Adventures of Fat Albert. Weekday mornings at 9 and afternoons at 2 right here on TV 38. Now, let's ride with the Galaxy Rangers. It's a pleasure to finally meet you, natives. I am Plywheel and this is my brother, Gilplex. We are not natives. We are here because of our distress calls. Why did you attack our friends? Friends? They are corporate spies sent to steal our secrets from us. Just what is going on here? That should be self-evident. We are building progress. And a better way of life through chemistry. We must draw their fire away from the rover. Any ideas? How do you talk me into these things? Great. We're safe up here. We arrived to find this factory dead and we started it back up. That is what we do, Plywheel. Why? To manufacture super alloys. To return industry to your world. This is not our world. We are visitors. What? Then where are the natives? We came to find out. Having fun without me? Oh, are we glad to see you. Ditto, buddy. What's with these jokers? They're making super alloys for robots. They're messing up the environment. Let's go. The alien is back! Call out the robots! Uh-oh. Stay back! Get out of here. I'll leave these droids away. Back to work! That's an order. You've got to find that distress signal source. This muck's disgusting. I know what you mean. How about it, Doc? Just take care of everything from the neck down. You got it. Much obliged. Pathfinder, ask this heap where their main computer's located. Right on, Doc. Hooray! These guys are tricky. Where is it, Chum? Right behind you. In the middle of Spook Stat. Now all we need is someone dumb enough to climb down there. There's something up ahead. Let's go back for Ghosts. Ocean Brothers, thank goodness you've come. We need your help, brothers. Follow us. Let's go, Wizard. You see? The darkness encircles us. Awfully hard to see down here. Uh-oh. You are not the regular technician. Yeah, about that, my cod. Whoa! Oops. Wow! An underwater city! Our home. Welcome, friends. Thank you for answering our call. For centuries, the land factories have remained dead. Then the mighty factories started again and brought us a terrible darkness. We tried to tell them the darkness will kill us, but they do not understand. So we turned to the stars for help. We tried to tell them the darkness will kill us, but they do not understand. So we turned to the stars for help. So we turned to the stars for help. Nico! Hi, Icarus, Winter. This is the source of the distress signal. It was sent years ago before the pollution blocked the transmission. Come on, there's still time to save the natives from the darkness. Honest, I swear this is just a routine checkup. Tell me another one. Zack, help! Oh, you haven't accomplished. All right, what company are you from? Who sent you? Come on, Doc. Quit crowing around. Uh-oh. You're on your own, Doc. Your friend cannot help you now, you hacker. Searchlight, Firefly, get up here on the double. We can't get out! What's up, Doc? Pixel, oh, no. I'll help you, Doc. What should I do? Let me at it. I'm mortalizing. Just tell it to let me go. Right, Doc. Now, please, that tickles. Let go of that! Whoa! Yeah, real funny. Stop! I don't kill you. Tell us the truth. I admit it. I'm not the central computer. You're not? I'm a decoy. The central computer is nowhere near here. Do you mean the central computer gets preferred treatment? Oh. Well, I never thought of it that way. Hey, doesn't that make you just a tiny bit jealous? Now that you mention it, it doesn't seem fair, does it? I mean, here I am, cooped up in the smokestack, fending off invaders, while he's mass-producing real cool robots. There's no justice in this world. That's what you think. Yes, I showed them. I just said the right thing. You . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .